Sadly Finished
by ThePersonWithTheReallyLongName
Summary: A fanfic writer never seems to finish any of her stories, that is untill she's sucked into hyrule and goes on an adventure of her own Link/OC/Sheik hopefully better than it sounds
1. Begginings and intro joy

**AN: I'm gonna say what you all must be sick of hearing before you read every story, I don't own Zelda, Just Mickey Andrew and a coupleof others**

Have you ever just started something, not really planning on finishing it? Of course you have, who hasn't? That happens to everyone. It's different for every person though. For me, it's my stories, I can always start one, but I won't ever finish it. This story is different though. This one actually has an ending. Only reason why is because I was there, it happened to me, and quite frankly I don't care if you believe me or not, because it happened. And I'll never forget.

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Chapter 1 The happening of random events

I guess in order for you to know what I'm talking about you'll need to hear the beginning. Well, it started like every other normal day in the so normal town I live in, the sun was shining the birds were chirping, and just like every other day, I was being annoyed. You see even though it was a beautiful day outside I was stuck inside, for school. Yes, I know, it sucks. That's what life is like when you're a sophomore though, you get constantly bickered at then you can't even go outside when it's nice out.

Anyway I was scribbling in my little orange notebook, about my stupid teacher who will remain stupid for the rest of her life. She can't even teach. I know right? She should be fired, but that's another story and I'll tell you all about it later. There's something special about this notebook, it might look like a normal notebook, might smell like a normal notebook, but that's because it is a normal notebook. The thing about it that makes it so special is that it's my notebook of all the stories I've never finished.

"Hey Mickey!" Leah, my best friend who also hates our teacher with a burning passion, whispered to me.

"Hey what?" I whispered back to her still scribbling down in my notebook.

"Whatcha' writing?"

"Letters that will eventually turn into words, that will eventually becomes sentences." I said in a low voice. I don't even know why we're whispering. Our math teacher is deaf. Seriously I called her a whore when she wasn't even like two feet away, and she didn't hear. Yeah she's that pathetic.

"Can I read it?"

"No,"

"Please."

"Okay maybe later." The thing about Leah is, she understands why I can't finish a story, I don't like staying in one spot for too long. Dwelling on the past bothers me more than you know. Carpe Diem, it's what we are taught but apparently I'm the only one that actually does it.

When the bell rang I let her steal my notebook from underneath my arm so she could start reading. I didn't get it back for about an hour which I found pretty sad considering it's only six pages long.

"Mickey that's really good." She said as she handed it back to me.

"Thanks."

"Let me guess it's a Zelda fan fiction."

"Yeppers" I said as I reopened to the page it ended on. "It's going to be called Behind Dark Doors."

"So are you actually going to finish this one?"

"Who knows? Hey you know what would be funny?"

"If our math teacher got hit by a car?"

"YES!!!! HAHA but not what I was thinking. What if I was in a legend of Zelda fan fiction?" Leah rolled her eyes as she pulled out a notebook to take down notes, like the rest of the class. Notes are so boring. The rest of school day was spent writing the story.

"Hey Mickey," I heard a deep voice sound behind me.

"Hey Idiot." I said as I rolled my eyes and went back to my notebook.

_And the trees rusled slightly as the moment seemed to slow down. Elenya stood there frozen before the man in front of her. His blood red eyes seemed to shine strangely by the moon light…_

"Come on, what I ever do to you?" Die you stupid little moron that won't shut up!

"You bug me, now shut up and leave me alone." He sat next to me and started to hum some tune I've never heard before. "Andrew what part of leave me alone don't you understand?" I ssaid as I moved away from him.

"What's your story about?"

"Twilight Princess, will you leave me alone now?" Of course not, he has no friends of his own to bother.

"I love that game. Can I read it?"

"No."

"Come on.."

"No. Now leave me alone, before I hurt you." I snapped the book shut and threw it into my bag trying to get him to leave me alone. Okay cue the awkward silence time… Well maybe not, how about I tell you about this guy since you have no clue who he is. He is a jock that won't leave me alone he gets straight A's plays world of war craft and Zelda. He sounds like a dream come true to a girl like me. In all honesty I use to have a crush on him. Now I just find his random sounds his stalker breathing and his random debates annoying.

"So, you going to the dance?"

"No, now shut up."

"Me either. Want to go catch a movie or something?"

"No."

"Why not?" I groaned. Doesn't this guy get a hint???

"Because frankly your annoying."

"You love me."

"No I hate your existence now go!" Stupid bell ring already! Finally God answered my prayers and let me leave, but sadly luck wasn't on my side. Once I stepped out of the classroom I got run over by something or someone fell down and smacked my pretty little head on the tiled floor. Oh happy days…

The strange thing was when I got back up I wasn't in school anymore. I was now in the middle of a forest. I still have all my school supplies though. I dropped my books and walked down a short path.

"Hello?" I called out walking down to an entrance of a small field, I heard voices of children coming from that area so went further to investigate. What I saw next made me want to do something, not sure what I wanted to do but it was something.

"Uhm, Hey do you think you guys could help me?" I asked three children wearing weird clothes. Honestly it looked like I was at a convention or China or someplace. The three children looked at me with a strange look on their faces. "I'm wondering if I could get some directions." Why won't they stop staring at me??"

"Miss can I help you?" a strangely firmiliar voice asked me. I thought I just got rid of that stupid Andrew! I looked at the source of the voice and he definately was not Andrew. He had the same blue eyes as Andrew, but man was this boy pretty.

"Uh, yeah. Could you tell me where we are? I'm afraid I'm a … Little lost," Not to mension confused hell.

"Oh sure. This is Ordan Village." I felt the blood drain from my face. "Miss are you okay?" Ordan… Village… That means… Is this …Link?????????? With that thought I suddenly got really dizzy and blacked out.


	2. What the?

Chapter 2 What the?

"Oh, I think she's waking up." A young voice called out. Man that was a weird dream.

"Good, Colin go ask Link to fetch some water." A deep voice said. Wait since when was there a Link that went to my school? Don't tell me that was real! I opened my eyes and saw brown ones staring back down at me. "Miss are you all right?"

Well, I was just sucked into a land that wasn't supposed to be existent, my head is killing me, and I just met Blue eyed wonder. How exactly was I supposed be all right?!

"Fine," I mumbled as I started to sit up and rub my forehead. Looking around I realized I wasn't where I had fainted. Now I was in a small cabin, strangely it seemed really cozy. It was probably Colin's home. How are four people going to live in here? "Where am I?"

"In my house, and as Link told you earlier, this is Ordan Village. May I ask where it is your from?" The man seemed to be in his late thirties, maybe early forties. Must be Rusle.

"Um, I would love to tell you but I can't really remember…" That's a total lie, I'm from Salisbury, but just like in all the other Fanfiction's none of these people know about America so what's the point? Rusle seemed to buy it though.

"Do you have any where to stay?" I started feeling a little guilty about lying to him, he seems like a real nice guy, but really how many people do you know of that is sane and told you they're from a place you never heard of before or on any maps? Logic people.

"Uh, no I don't think so…" We stood up and the door opened. I spun around to look at who was there, sadly I spun around too fast and lost my balance. Before I knew it I was falling forward. A small scream escaped my throat as I went down.

"Whoa, there!" I heard Andrew's voice call out. Wait a second I mean Link. Wow this is going to be tough. I took me a moment to realize that his arms were the only thing keeping me up. "You okay?" Concern was in his voice.

"Yeah, yeah I'm fine." His arms let go of me as I regained my balance and stood on my own two feet.

"What's your name?" Rusle asked me once I turned around again, this time seven times slower holding on to Link's arm for support. Should I tell him my real name? Probably. It would be easier for me to actually respond to something directed toward me. Then again they'll probably fined my name freakishly strange, well what about that girl that's in love with Link… Oh yeah! Beth that's it! It's a name from America. Mickey it is then.

"I 'm not sure… My things! Maybe there's a clue in there!" I knew they can't read English, but hey I could and people with Amnesia can do these things so yeah.

"We already tried that. Know one in the village knew how to read that language. Then again it is yours. Maybe you can read it." Oh my God just give me my things! I tried to remain calm as I saw it but it was too much for me to deal with. I had to write in it. I had to write all this down. My fingers twitched as I the orange notebook came my way. Rusle gave me the love of my life and I felt complete with it once my fingers came in contact with the cardboard cover.

I opened it and started reading. Elenya came up really often and my real name never did. So I just stuck with that. My name is Elenya.

"I think it's Elenya." Surprise came to both of their faces. What? What did I say? "Is something wrong?"

"No it's just that, Elenya is the name of the heroine one of our legends." Well I wasn't expecting that. I would laugh if they were like the stories I got half way through. "She helped the Hero of Time." Really now. As Jack Sparrow would say, well that's interesting. Oh man I really want to watch that movie now… "My name's Rusle by the way." Finally he introduced himself so I can call him by his name. Yes!

"Nice to meet you Rusle." Rusle made a move for the door and before he left he told us he was going to talk to Bo. "Who's Bo?" The first question I asked that I didn't actually know the answer to. I remember that name, I just don't know who it belongs to.

"He's our Mayor." Right! New that. Definitely new that. "Do you know where you're going to sleep tonight?" What time was it now?

"No. What time is it?"

"It's almost dark. You can stay with me if you want." I know that attitude. That cocky attitude was just like Andrew's. Figures. Why can't I ever get away from that kid? Looking at all my options I realized it was probably best for me. He isn't all that annoying, and he already knows not to bug me so I guess I can deal with his attitude. Besides, every other house has a little kid or the Plot Device. Plot device is Ilia if you didn't figure that out already. She's like that werewolf from Twilight. His name is completely blanking right now. She has no real purpose in the story and she annoys me to no end.

"Sure. I don't see why not." He smiled at me when he heard. It wasn't like a cocky grin; which was what I was expecting. It was more of a tired smile, as if he's been through a lot.

"Follow me." That's what I did. I followed him up the path, and up the ladder. I always wanted to know what it was like to live in a tree house. "You can take the bed it's up on the balcony." His house looks exactly like it does in the game, a roaring fire with very little furniture.

"No it's alright. I don't like sleeping in beds." It's the truth. I can't sleep in a bed with out being in pain.

"Don't worry about it."

"Just take the bed already. You look tired." I walked back over to the door to go outside showing him I wasn't about to take no for an answer. I left his house to go outside and look at the moon. It's my favorite pass time when I'm awake at night. I've been doing it since I can remember. The moons pale glow made everything visable, it was even bright enough for me to write, and that's exactly what I did.

I didn't stop until I couldn't see the moon because it was hiding behind the trees. I decided to go back in and once I did I saw Link asleep on the carpet in front of me. So he thinks that he'll get me to use his bed does he? Think again Elf-boy. Quietly I shut the door and laid down next to him using my arm as a pillow. Nice try. You lose.


	3. Stupid Plot Device!

**AN: here's Chapeter 3. I tried to make it long for your own entertainment **I know that it randomly goes into italics, but I'mnot sure how to fix it because it does that when I ever I upload a new chapter so bare with me

**Special thanks to zeldafan10101, Sleepless Heroine, vamyrgirl1997, and Fiery Diamond**

**and as you already know I only own the plot and the oc's **

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Chapter 3 Stupid Plot-Device!!!

I'm not a morning person, it's a fact everyone should know, but strangely I woke up the next morning really early, and man am I thankful for it. The sun wasn't even up yet when I came back from dreamland, but even though I was full of energy and everything I was too lazy to get up. Actually I was too lazy to even open my eyes, which I'm still kicking myself for it by the way, because if I opened my eyes once I woke up then I would have noticed that my pillow wasn't the body pillow I usually sleep with. In all honesty I didn't even realize I wasn't even in America anymore.

"Hey, Elenya… Wake up." I groaned at the thought of leaving the warmth that surrounded me. "Really Elenya, I need you to get up so I can go to work." The voice rumbled my 'pillow' that I had a death grip on. Which was actually really firm, and what do you do when you have a really hard pillow? Why, you punch it of course! Well you might not, but I do, and that's mistake number two. Once I punched it, it went 'oof' which of course shouldn't have happened because pillows don't need to breathe, and that brings me to something I should have noticed long before. My pillow was breathing.

Even though there were all these obvious signs that I wasn't using my body pillow I just snuggled in closer, that is until it started to move, and that's when I realized that my pillow wasn't a what, but a who. My eyes shot open to look up, half expecting to see my beige wall, instead I saw Link's face with the most awkward look being expressed. Now I remembered everything. By everything I mean everything, even the fact that Link never actually told me his name. I feel so bad for the kid, he had me clinging on him and he I didn't even ask for his name.

Realizing I still had my leg draped over his hips and my arm was draped over his stomach, I jumped back and stood up.

"Sorry." I mumbled, I felt my face and neck get hot as I looked down at him. I don't know how I could have missed the fact that he changed out of his normal day clothes into what I can only guess are his pajamas. The garb was a light white sleeveless tunic with loose pants made from the same material. Me being the teenage girl that I am couldn't help but notice that his tunic was open giving me a perfect view of the perfect chest this guy has.

This my friends, brings me to mistake number three, and here's a warning for you, when you can see a guy with his shirt off, don't stare at him. You might think that he doesn't notice, but he does, he's just nice enough to ignore it then call you a stalker later on in his life. Elf-boy though… Not so much.

"Why are you staring at me?" Me being me, did what I do best, no not lie… even though I am very good at that. No, I made up an excuse that is perfect and completely logical and half true.

"Because I'm a teenage girl and you're a teenage boy that's putting his chest on display for the whole world to see." I responded with a smart ass tone. Sadly it didn't go as well as planned. He wasn't joking about it, no it was much, much worse. He was blushing and being modest. How the hell am I supposed to be normal with him if he's being so _good?_ I decided to laugh off the awkwardness between us. "Didn't you say your had to go to work?" I asked him as he looked my way.

He shook his head then brushed his fingers through his blond hair before getting up. Link started to go up stairs to get clothes to change into, that's when I realized something… I had a problem. I had a problem fore I had no clothes on me. Other than what I was wearing of course.

"You know, you never told me your name." I said loudly making sure he could hear me. I heard the opening of a chest then rustling of cloth. Didn't really realize that video game characters had more than one outfit. When I heard the chest shut I walked over to the ladder and looked up half tempted to go up, but I wasn't about to risk seeing him naked so I decided not to.

"My names Link." I heard him say. I already knew his name, but he didn't know I knew that, and if I called him by his name that would have been even more awkward.

"Nice name. What does it mean?"

"I think in the ancient language it means courage, not sure though." I heard him put his pajamas away. Then a thought popped in my head.

"Do you know what Elenya means?" I was straining my neck trying to see him, but alas I could not. I'm still amazed that Elenya was an actual person. She's the main character of most of the stories I started writing, and in my stories her name is supposed to mean darkness or shadow. Her name suits her perfectly, she has green eyes and pale skin with long dark hair, and her personality is just as dark as her name. Calm, quiet, patient, and knows that you shouldn't fear the dark, you should fear what's in it.

"It means Light." What?!? Light? Well I was way off.

"Are you sure?" I asked him as he started to finally climb down the ladder. At about half way down he jumped off the ladder.

"Yes." Huh, how about that. Once again I Mickey Darley, am wrong. His clothes were almost completely different from what he was wearing yesterday, making me wrong about the whole 'videogame characters only have one outfit' theory. Yesterday he was wearing a white sleeveless tunic with almost cargo pants and a green wide sash underneath a thin yellow sash. Today he's wearing The same white tunic, but this time his pants were a dull green and his waist was wrapped in a blue wide sash tied together by a green sash. Speaking of clothing…

"Um Link? Do you know where I could buy some clothes?" I inquired noticing how out of place I felt in my faded old jeans and green hooded shirt. He apparently thought I did something wrong because he told me to go down to Bo's house and ask His daughter Ilia, whom I hate. Well more along the lines of dislike with a great passion. And he doesn't really know that I don't like her, and really I shouldn't dislike her, I never actually met her…

I was so right in wanting to hate her. She won't stop giving me these full length dresses! I can't do anything in dresses! I can't even walk in them so how the hell am I going to have fun in one? I was currently in her house sitting on her bed watching her pull out dress after dress after dress. I looked into her chest seeing if there was anything that I would wear and you know what? She had ten different tunics and leggings that I could wear.

"Ilia, not that I'm not thankful for your help in trying to get me something to wear, but I would really like it if you let me pick." I know it sounds polite and everything because your reading it, but really my voice was laced and drooling with frustration.

"I'm sorry do you not like what I picked out for you?" She said concern in her voice… Well I think it was concern anyway. It might have been curiosity. I don't know.

"Well… Not trying to be mean or anything, but I hate dresses." Plus my top is too heavy for them, I'll pop out.

"Sorry, but that's all I have." Liar! I just saw at least ten tunics and leggings, she can at the least spare me one!

"What about the tunics?" I quirked my right eyebrow. Hehe. I like that word, quirked. Quirked quirked quirked quirked quirked. Okay that's enough of the quirk fest.

"That's what I wear when I'm working." I leaned back on her bed supporting myself on my elbows looking at what she's wearing and then studied the dresses. The dresses didn't look too elaborate, actually they were pretty plain looking. Just one solid color, but it had an elegance to it that just made me feel uncomfortable just by looking at it. That's when I had an idea.

"Are you ever going to wear these again?"

"No, you can keep them."

"So they're mine to do whatever I want to them?" She turned around and looked at me with her brows brought together in confusion. Then she slowly nodded her head looking at me with a wary eye once she figured out what I was going to do with them. I threw the dresses into my arms and struggled with them to Uli. You know, the blond pregnant woman from the game. She was sitting on her porch with a content look on her face. Her round blue eyes looked almost grey in the sunlight, and when she saw my struggling she seemed very entertained.

"Elenya, do you want help with that?" Everyone knows me here but I'm not supposed to know anyone's name… So how's this going to work out?

"No thank you. I'll manage." I said trying to make sure none of the clothes bundled in my arms would hit the dirt. I mean how would it look if I made a pregnant woman get up and help me? "Are you Rusle's wife?"

Her smile widened and her eyes had a soft glow to them. She was a very pretty woman.

"Yes I am,"

"I was wondering if you could help me change these dresses into tunics and pants." She gasped so loud I thought she was going into labor. Apperently she likes dresses too.

"But these are so beautiful!"

"I know, but I can't do much in dresses other than sit and look pretty. They don't fit too well up top anyway." Uli listened to my reasoning then agreed to help me. When she sat up I asked if there was anything I could do to help her then she told me that she'll be just fine.

Uli opened the door to her house and had me put the load on the couch, by the time we were done I had several tiny little holes in me, and ten different outfits.

"You know as painful as this was I had fun." I said as folded them neatly into a basket. It's a shame I couldn't stay here. By here I mean with Uli and Rusle. Not that I have anything against Link, it's just that he's stubborn, and I'm' always awkward around him, just because I'm afraid to get sarcastic.

"Mom, I'm home!" a little boy with blond hair said as he opened the door to the house. When I saw him I felt homesick. He looks just like my nephew EJ. His clothes looked a little too long for him, but in reality it was the perfect length. He had his mother's hair and face.

"Hello!" I said in an almost sing-song voice while waving to him. He stared at me a little then gave me a coy hello. "Well, I better get back to Link's place. Bye." After standing up I picked up the woven basket and carried it up to Link's house. Which sounds a lot easier than it really is because in order to get into his house you need to go up a ladder, and in order to do that you need at least one free hand. So it took me forever to get up there.

Once I got in I changed into a pale green tunic and matching pants. I looked very similar to Ilia, but it's all I got so I can deal with it. After I changed I noticed it was late in the day and decided to go visit Link on the ranch.

"Hey Link!" I called trying not to scare the goats. Oh yes, I know all about the death by goat thing in the game, and I wasn't about to attempt to try that theory out.

Link was on a horse galloping around and jumping fences, but stopped when he heard me call out him. His horse galloped over to me when he nudged it with his heel.

"I never saw Ilia wear that tunic before." He stated once he jumped off the saddle. What, no hey Elenya how ya doing first? Real smooth.

"That's because it was once a dress. She gave it to me so I could wear it. Hey don't look at me like that! I asked her if I could cut it up first don't worry about it!"

"I'm just about to go home, you want a ride?" he asked putting his hand on the stir-up or what ever that thing in the front of the saddle is called.

"Sure, I don't see why not." I said as I grabbed his hand so we could hoist myself up. Everything had a red tint to it because of the sun setting. Man did it look pretty. The sun sets in Nova Scotia don't even come close to how magnificent this seen looked. A blood red sun was falling between tree covered mountains that surrounded the village. Most beautiful thing I have ever seen.

"You better hold on, we're going to jump the fence."

"Wait wha-?!?" I clung on to him when he kicked the horse so we would go into a full gallop. When we landed from jumping the fence I smacked Links shoulder hard yelling at him to never do that again. He just laughed. Stupid Link, with his stupid horse.

We went into a canter as we past through the village, when we got to his house Rusle was there waiting for us.

"Good evening you two."

"Good evening." We said in unison.

"Elenya, if you don't mind, I'm going to steal Link and Epona. I need to collect firewood for the village."

"It's fine." I said as I swung my leg over Epona's hide to get off. "Have fun you two." I said as they started to leave. I took this to an advantage. I could use this time to write in my notebook with out them noticing anything weird. After about half an hour I saw Uli and Colin come up to the clearing or Link's yard, whatever you prefer. "Hello again." I called and waved to them putting my notebook down along with the pencil that came along with it.

"How has the rest of your day been Elenya?" Uli asked me putting a hand on her son's shoulder.

"Fine, how about you?" I climbed down the ladder to go join them.

"It's been good."

"That's good." We shared some small talk until Rusle and Link came back. Colin seemed so excited when he saw his father and Link. He really must idolize that boy. When we were saying good bye and everything Link and I were just about to go inside when the Ranch owner called him to go put the goats away. Once Link was out of sight I put my notebook away and went down to go into town. Introduce myself to everyone around there. It was all going fine till Ilia came out.

"Hi Elenya." She said with a smile on her face. "Great job with making your own tunics." What was she trying to do?

"I had a lot of help."

"Really now?"

"Yep."

"From who??"

"Uli. She was more than glad to help me."

"That's good." When we fell silent I just started to head back to Link's house ignoring the glare I was getting from Beth on my way there. Oh jeeze this is going to be interesting.


	4. to follow or not to follow?

**AN hey guys this is going to be the last chapter before the drought of Sadly Finished updates because I have a lot of testin and everything I have to do, but I'll try to make them long when ever I update and I'll try to nkae them good. By the by, if you want to contact me my AIM SN is crazypixie11 and my email is **

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Chapter 4 To follow or not to follow. (Part 1)

I already had a very good idea of what Rusle told Link when they went on their little walk, but I still wanted to make sure. I'm sorry to say this but I've actually been getting close to that little Elf-Boy. Bad I know, life's going to suck when I have to go back. Besides, I need to say something to him when he gets back.

"Elenya, I'm back. Sorry it took so long." It was him, and Link looked tired as ever. Link probably thought that dinner would be on the little table very close to my sleeping spot. Speaking of food, I would kill for some calamari right now. "I don't have to work tomorrow, so I'll actually be able to hang out with you."

And here I was, thinking that Link was a quiet little boy that seemed very hot. Oh well, that's just one of the parts of life that no one likes I guess. Right now he's kind of reminding me of… An-. You know what never mind. Don't want to think about it.

"That's cool… So… What did you and Rusle talk about on your little walk?" I propped my head up with my hands as I lied down on the floor. Link's face turned bright red and he quickly walked over to the fire that I started a while ago. Maybe I was wrong about what they started talking about. He was in the middle of making our dinner when he finally answered me.

"Rusle asked me to do something for him." That's all I got from him till when he actually served our dinner. He was sitting in a chair and I was on the floor relaxing while picking at the fish on my wooden plate, the room was very quiet and a little awkward. I think he was trying to be discrete about stealing glances at me, but I'm finding it hard to believe that he's going to be the one to save the world, considering how obvious he's being.

"So, are you going to tell me what he wanted you to do or not?" Link's face got all red again. What the heck did Rusle say to him?! I'll laugh if it has something to do with me. "You do realize that if you don't tell me Rusle will eventually. If not him, then Uli." He mumbled something but I couldn't hear a word he said. Link kept staring at his plate staying quiet. Then I tried a different technique. "Secrets don't make friends." more silence. "Fine be that way!" I said very loudly, hey I was getting very frustrated with his emo kidness. I mean, you would be too!

"I'm going to present a sword Rusle made to the Royalty of Hyrule." Okay I know that's not what all this is about. "And-" come on! Say it Link! "Rusle thinks it's a good idea to bring you with me. He said that it would be smart if we went over to Kakoriko Village to go see if the healer can help you regain your memory." Oh shit… Not good. Ranado lives there. He knows everything; which means that he'll read me like an open book written in large font. I'm in a pickle… Then again everyone is suppose to get kidnapped before he can actually go anywhere. That will probably give me enough time to come up with a back up plan for when we get there.

I finished my fish and put the dish in a wooden bucket. Yes a wooden bucket, and yes everything here is made out of wood, except for the silverware…. I'm afraid to find out what those are made of… Everything was quiet, and the moon was low in the sky. I was lost in my own thoughts when suddenly I remembered something, Link seemed embarrassed about the fact that I was going with him, and that my dear friends is weird considering I live with him.

"Why are you embarrassed about the fact of my going with you?" I asked leaning against the wall. My arms where crossed and my hair was laying on my shoulders, all in all I was in a very comfy position. Elf-Boy put the dishes away and didn't answer me. He just climbed up to his bed and fell asleep in his working clothes. I'm not sure if he was ignoring me or if it was just the little factor of him not hearing me, either way it made me giggle. Not sure why I'm always so happy to see Elf-Boy in awkward situations either, but it works for me anyway.

I got my night clothes out of the basket and changed into a nightgown with sleeping pants. Once I was done I just sprawled myself out on the rug and just stared at the dying fire in front of me till I was in my own little world of dreams.

"Mickey! Are you okay?!" Leah? What is she doing here? I opened my eyes and saw Leah staring straight down at me, her grey green eyes bore down into my own as I suddenly felt a huge wave of pain take over my head.

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"Ow!" I yelped holding the back of my head in my hand. How long was I out for? I glanced around and saw that I was no longer in Elf-Boy's house, but I was in school. What the?…

"You should be careful, you got a concussion when you got trampled on by Brendan." So I just thought all that up? No that's not possible. I never bring my school things into my dreams. Even when I have a dream about school I don't have my school things. What about my journal?

"Hey, you okay?" I looked up and saw Brendan standing next to me, gangster outfit and all. How could this stick of a thing knock me down?! Am I really that weak? "Sorry I knocked you over." For once he actually looked sincere, and that scared me more than the fact that I was recovering from getting a concussion. I know I'm a messed up kid. You see Brendan was one of the kids that constantly teased me when I was younger, so him being nice is just weird…

"I'm fine, don't worry about it." I stood up very slowly learning form my last fainting experience, I held on to Leah's arm for support my right hand still holding my head trying to make the throbbing go away. I searched for my stuff and saw Him holding my things. By holding I mean dragging my bag and carrying my binders. A smirk came over my face, the sight was priceless I'm telling you. "Having fun?" I asked Andrew, seeing him struggle with my things I slowly walked over to him to take them from him.

"How the heck can you carry this thing?!" He asked too loudly. My head felt like it would explode.

"Could you try not to be so loud?" I asked softly taking my bag and throwing it over my shoulder with ease. He just scoffed at me and handed Leah my binders before he started walking away. Before he could get too far away from me I grabbed his wrist to keep him there. I let go of his hand before thanking him. I know it's out of place for me but I haven't seen anyone in the past two days so I'm a little different. I can blame it all on brain damage later anyway.

"Mickey, you ready to go home?" Leah asked me. I'm finding it hilarious how know one even noticed I got a concussion in the middle of the hallway. The teachers didn't even seem to care.

"Yeah, let's go."

The bus ride home went by quick, sadly it was because I was too busy thinking about what just happened. Was it all just in my head? It couldn't be. Could it? I finally pulled out of my thoughts as we pulled up to Brendan's stop; which is right before mine. When he walked past me he gave me another look of sincere regret for knocking me down. He got off the bus, the doors shut, and we started to drive down a long road that lead to my house. My house seemed the same, but something didn't feel right when I thought of it as my home. This concussion is really starting to screw with my mind.

Two thoughts came to mind when I got into my room. First was I was going to go pack an extra bra and underwear just incase it wasn't a dream. Second was if this was all just a dream then it would make the greatest story anyone has ever written. So that's how all of this started, why I suddenly started to finish a story. I searched my bag for my orange notebook to start writing in it, but once I sat down I looked at it not feeling the will to write my story down. I guess what happened to me was what it feels like to want to change, so I didn't write it in my little orange notebook. Instead I took out a little green notebook, drew the triforce on it, then started writing. I'm not going to tell you what exactly I wrote because then this would be the story that never ends, so if you really want to know what I wrote then go back and read everything you just read.

I wrote till my hand was sore, well that and when my mom threatened to ground me for staying in my room. And dinner, but hey that doesn't count, I mean when you've been eating nothing other than Link's cooking for two days you'd be dying for a cheezeburger too. Unless you're a vegetarian, then you just don't count. I mean I love you?…. Don't hurt me!

It was about midnight when I stopped writing because I ran out of things to say, things to talk about. I changed took a quiet shower and went to bed. Thinking that when I woke up the next day I'd wake up there in my bed that I rarely ever slept in. For the first time in a long time I prayed to God that I'd see Hyrule again.

This just keeps getting stranger and stranger because for the first time in my life I was right about something. I woke up in my bed with a huge pain in my back. I was so stiff it's not even funny, okay maybe it was funny for everyone else, but it wasn't funny for me. Standing outside waiting for the bus to come pick me up I realized Brendan was walking down towards my stop, another weird happening. If he was coming down here to say sorry again I might shoot myself. He stood next to me in all his wangster glory. His short blond hair was covered by his hood with his hands in the pockets of his sweater.

"Hey," I said, I'm sorry I just couldn't stand the silence. I was already in a bad mood because it was morning, but when someone keeps breathing down my neck and doesn't say anything, they better know how to defend themselves because I will go bitch on everyone's asses. It's true.

"Hey," Okay… Well then if this wasn't so awkward then I might have made fun of him, but it was and I wasn't. So I just stood there with my binders in my arms. "Do you know what the history homework was?" Come one seriously? You're an A student! And I fail every subject known to man kind!

"No, sorry." I said to him hoping the bus would just get here already. More silence, boring silence. I heard the roaring of the bus engine, and my eyes rolled up so I could look up at the sky so I could thank what ever heavenly being answered my wanting. I let him get on first and then I followed him on. Note to self, when Brendan tries talking to you ignore him. And when he walks down to your bus stop for some random reason go back inside pretending that you got sick or something.

I spent the whole ride asleep, and I would have missed getting off if it weren't for Brendan waking me up. Stupid Blond jerk waking me up from my sleep. Did I mention that it started raining on the way to school? So now the floor was wet and my shoes like slipping… So when I was stepping down from the bus my foot slipped and this time I went head first into concrete, oh joy.

* * *

"Elenya, it's about time you woke up!" Link said as he entered his house with a slingshot in his hand. Wait what? Oh I confessed.

"You should have woken me up then." I said as I yawned and stretched. I stood up feeling so disguisting you have know clue. It's like I haven't taken a bath in a week. "Link do you know where I can take a bath?" I asked while gathering today's clothes. He stopped walking and looked at me with the strangest expression on his face. "What?" He just shook his head in response and told me to go see the Plot-Device, well he called her Ilia. So what. I did, feeling almost desperate for a good bath.

"Elenya, did you know you have really nice hair?" Plot-Device asked me as she washed my hair for me. I washed everything else and shaved my legs before getting out. I know I have nice hair, it's the only nice thing about me. My eyes are a dull shade and my skin makes me look constantly sick, well I think so at least. You know what I look almost exactly like Ilia except that my nose isn't as pointy and my hair is much darker and much longer. Ilia and I had some small talk, I forget what it was about, something about horses. After getting to know Ilia here's something you need to know, she's a real person here, not just a tool like I thought she was. Actually she reminds me of Leah a little.

"So how do you like living with Link?" She asked as I stepped out of the tub to dry myself now feeling clean and ready to go.

"It's not bad. Get's a little weird sometimes, but that's just because that's how we are." She nodded in complete understanding. I got dressed after thanking her, I told her I was going to go hang out with Link now, and she told me to keep making sure that Link didn't get too bigheaded. With a laugh I told her not to worry about it and left her home.

I got there just in time to see him finish showing off for all the other kids. What I saw nearly broke my heart, because I noticed Colin being all on his lonesome. He really was just like my nephew, you have no idea. I decided to go talk to him, about what ever he wanted to talk about. I really didn't care just as long as he didn't feel as lonely as he looked.

"Hi," I said with hopefully a gentle smile. He seemed surprised that I was communicating with him.

"Hi," his face turned into a tomato. He really was a cute boy, really sweet too.

"You like Epona??" I asked him as I started petting her mane. He nodded before he started watching Link show off again. I sighed, I wasn't getting anywhere with this boy. And it was killing me, oh so very slowly.

"Isn't he great?" Oh my god he said more than two words? I looked down at him with confusion.

"Who?"

"Link." I scoffed, Link has skill sure but he's a show off.

"Great people don't like being in the spot light." I said watching him milk all the attention he's getting.

"They asked him if he would, not if they wanted to see him do the tricks." Colin must really adore Link if he was defending him like this. Not that I can blame him, Link's a real great person, it's just that he seemed to remind me of Andrew, and that bothers me to no end.

He came our way and I left with a cold look on my face. Not sure why I did it, but I did. I guess I'm just a little crabby. I know it's almost time for Link to follow the kids but I'm not so sure I want to get into all of that. So I just went down to the spring and sat on it's bank waiting for the sound of children running and a screaming monkey.

I heard the chase begin and I soon followed them across the bridge. When Epona came with Link on her back I pointed in the direction Talo went in. I decided against going with Link to go save Talo, apparently my decision doesn't matter to Link, considering how he just threw me onto his horse. Guess I'm going to follow him anyway. A fence was coming up quickly and I grabbed on to Link's torso making sure I don't fall off thinking all the way Why me???


	5. to follow or not to follow? part 2

**Special thanks to Sleepless Heroine and The Silent Orion for your opinions for the next chapter.**

**Okay guys I want to know your opinion too so I want to know which idea you like more**

**1) Elenya/ Mickey goes into Twilight with Link**

**2)She gets kidnapped with everyone else**

**tell me what you think in your review please :) **

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Chapter 4.5 to follow or not to follow part 2

"Link will you slow down!" I yelled at him as we passed through narrow green path ways on Epona. It's been a good five minutes since he pulled me up onto his horse and my eyes were sqeezed shut and I was holding on to him for dear life. All of a sudden we came to a quick stop and my head collided with Link's shoulder; which is actually very bony. I opened my eyes and let go of his waist so he could go save Talo. We were right in front of a cave, I'm guessing it's the cave that leads to the heart of the forest. I'm not going to pretend to be brave, because I'm not. Frankly I'm a coward, and there is no way anyone was going to get me in there. There's bats and evil rats things and spider webs and man eating plants. No not going to happen. I refuse.

"It's locked!" Link said in an angery whisper. Good, well good for me, bad for Talo.

"Hey Guys over here!" A man with the largest afro I have ever seen called to us. Are those birds in his hair?!? Link threw me off the horse and dragged me over to Afro dude. "Hey I locked that up because weird monsters were coming out of there." I shouldn't even be here right now! "It's dark in there, your going to need this," Afro dude handed Link a fair sized lantern. "And you'll also need this," he gives me the key, me the girl who doesn't even want to think about going in there! He's officially on my hit list.

"What makes you think I'm going in there?!?!" I asked nearly screamed at him. He cringed and almost fell off his chair/rock thing he was sitting on. Link just took the key from my hand and dragged me to the locked gate. He is going to get in so much trouble after this, I swear on my wii, he will pay.

"Elenya, hurry up we have to go save Talo!" Link yelled back to me once he entered the cave. The only reason why I followed him the rest of the way through is because I was too scared to go back. He had the only source of light.

"We?! We didn't show him how to use a sword! WE didn't let him go chase a poor monkey to abuse it! It was all you!" My voice was overly harsh and my voice was a few octives higher than usual. He just stayed quiet, but I could tell he was tense too. When we got to the end I realized my celebration of freedom was bitter sweet, I completely forgot about needing to find the other key, and the field of purple evil monkeys. "Link… I think I'll just stay here till you get him and come back." My voice cracked in the middle of my sentence.

"Fine," Wow, he's really serious about all this. Well of course he is, this is one of his friends, not some silly little toy. I never realized how self centered I am. I would only slow him down if I went any way… Then again, I know where the key is. Before Link could get too far a head of me I called out to him and followed him.

"Wait, maybe I can help you." I said breathing heavily. I'm not very athletic. It's a fact. " I saw that there's a locked gate over on the other side, I'll help you look for the key. Just try to make sure neither of us get killed okay?" Yes, I'm still scared as hell, but I think it'll be all worth it in the end. Besides this isn't just a video game, this isn't just some two dimension character on the screen that you try to save five millions times and you can just try again if you die.

Link expression became less severe and he smiled a little. My eyes skimmed the wall of rock on my right looking for any indent to indicate that there's a cave. I spotted an area a good length away that had bats coming out of it. Not like a huge flock, but enough to show me that there could be the cave that held a chest that held the key to the gate north off us. I broke off in a sprint towards the cave and heard Link following me. I may not be athletic, but I am pretty fast. Well when you live my life you have to be.

I may be a fast runner, but my mind isn't as fast as I'd like it to be, because right when I was almost at the cave, one of those venus fly trap things tripped me. The result of that was my shoulder hurt like a bitch, my knees has grass stains and grass burns on them, and my elbow was all bloody by landing on a rock. I scurried back on to my feet as Link beet the monster to a pulp with the wooden sword.

"Link be on your guard, there's probably going to be a lot more than that in the cave!" I told him while waiting for him to catch up with me. I suggested that he should go into the cave first considering he's the one with the sword, and everything. As dark as the cave was I could see the outlining of a small wooden chest and one of those purple monkey things standing in front of it. I hid in the shadows after stealing the slingshot from Link and shot it in the head three times before Link smacked unconscious. He opened the chest and picked up the key, then he whispered that we were ready to go make a run for the gate trying to get passed as many monsters as possible with out actually having to fight any.

The gate lead to another clearing that held three, maybe four purple monkey things. I think they're called moblins, I forget. Any way after having Link go in and battle them we ran past a bird that kept trying to get us to buy stuff from it. Huh, yeah like that's going to happen anytime soon.

"Link I think Talo is just up ahead." I said pointing towards the forest temple. We went up and had Link go up first because he has all the amazing swordsmanship talent. There were two more purple monkeys that I had Link finish off, then he broke open the wooden cage that Talo and the monkey were trapped in.

"Link you saved me!" Talo exclaimed as he nearly tackled Link. The monkey looked at me then ran off screeching. Do I really look that bad? "You know she really wasn't all that bad. Actually when the monsters came she tried to protect me and that's what got her caged too." My gaze went from where the monkey disappeared to Talo, then to Link. He seemed so relaxed and relieved, it's strange to think that just a few moments ago he was so intense.

We met Rusle at the entrance to the cave that made me hold on to Link for dear life, when we exited Rusle saw me hanging off him and I think he took it the wrong way, either that or he finds my fears amusing.

"Colin told me what happened, and I came to go find him, but apparently you two already did that for me. Thanks." It wasn't till Rusle gave us a little weird look that I remembered that I was holding on to Links arm, and I quickly let go of it. "I'll take him home, you to go and get some rest." He said before turning around to inform Talo's parents of the most resent events. Link jumped on Epona and lowered his hand to pull me up. Before I grabbed hold of his torso, I said something that seemed to rap this whole thing up pretty nicely, if I do say so my self.

"Hey Link,"

"Yeah?"

"Do you wanna know what the lesson of this is?"

"Sure,"

"Don't go chasing monkeys with a stick, purple or not." He started laughing, even though it isn't all that funny. I think he was laughing just because he needed to.

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**hey guys remeber to tell me which you would rather want her to stay or her to be kidnapped by green troll thingys that can't talk**

LUV YA- Bloody Emma


	6. AN I know they bug me too

HEY GUYS!!!!!! I have decided to have Elenya/Mickey get kidnapped tahnks everyone but if I hold out on the poll for much longer I don't think there will ever be a next chapter, and again thank you so much because if she went into twilight then she'd be a total Mary Sue and I don't want that, at all.

Actually I'm thinking the next chapter is going to be fairly long or just longer than the others and it's going to be funny! Well what I have planned out in my head is funny (yes for once in my life I'm planning something, everyone run, duck, and cover) I also wanted to say sorry for my sucky grammar and spelling and I hope you guys will like the up coming chapters 

Don't be afraid to throw some suggestions at me. AND I DON'T MEAN LITTERALLY!!

Lots of hugs because that's what makes the world go round and round and round, and lots of love

-Emma

ps- if it's not the direction you think it should be going don't be afraid to tell me


	7. Kidnapped by the evil green walking pigs

**HEY GUYS THANKS FOR REVIEWING oh and I know I said I was going to make this longer than the other ones but I guess you can call that a lie. It was suppose to be longer but I figured I'd just update a shortish chapter so I could work on the long part later**

**hope you all enjoy it!**

**Oh and another special thanks to all those who have reviewd and answered my little poll peace and love**

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Chapter 5 Kidnapped by the evil green walking pigs

The night was peaceful as I slept on the floor like usual and Link slept in his nice cozy bed, thankfully I didn't randomly go back to my world because in all honesty I have a math test that I really don't want to take, besides hanging out here in Hyrule is five million times better than being in the jail cell of a classroom. I didn't have any dreams either, just complete contentment.

When I woke up the next morning Link was gone and there was a bowl of grains on the table calling my name. I learned to trust Elf-Boy over the past couple of days, he really is a good guy, if you take away his bigheaded annoyingness and his strange way of knowing exactly what buttons to push. Well it's the fact that I found this new trust for him and the little factor that I can't cook unless you want to die. Seriously I burn water. It's very sad. Scooping up the mushy oats I looked all around the little house looking for some type of distraction, even though I know I should be thinking up a plan for when I arrive at that village I can't spell the name of. Maybe I can suddenly regain all of my memory then help Link with his quest. Nah, to Mary Sueish.

I finished my oats and threw my plates into the little bucket sink thing so I could go watch Link get beaten up by a girl. Got to admit, it's my favorite part of the game. So much humor, and it's so amazing. Sprinting isn't my thing, even though you have to admit I'm pretty good at it. My only problem is the fact of I have horrible endurance and that it will be the death of me. Mom told my to join track once, I almost broke my back just so I wouldn't have to do it. Hey I'm dedicated what can I say? If I don't want to do it I will do anything to get out of it. One of the reasons why I don't ever get any of my homework done.

Link was guiding Epona down the tiny dirt path that he was following along with Ilia by his side. They were laughing and I felt a little twinge of loneliness, thinking that I never had that type of friendship. Which by the way is a complete and total lie. I really hope that I get out of this game for good because it's slowly turning me into a Sue.

"Hey Elf-Boy!" I called to him running and still slightly out of breath. He still seemed in a very good mood even though he didn't say anything. Actually I wasn't even sure if he even acknowledged my existence. Standing there watching the scene play out before me I saw Link get off of Epona and start talking to Bo, wasn't sure what they said so I moved closer. One of my most hated faults is my timing, it couldn't get any worse than it already is because right when I got close enough to hear I got Ilia's high pitched screeching in my ear. Sheesh make me deaf why don't ya? Link's face was priceless as he was being scolded by the girl at least a foot shorter than himself. Note to self, never get on Ilia's bad side. It's not pretty, much like me in the morning.

She lead Epona away by the bridle as the men just hopelessly watched. I laughed so hard when I saw both of their reactions. I'm sorry, but I just think it's funny. I know I have a weird sense of humor. Like when I saw Haunting in Connecticut I couldn't breathe I was laughing so hard. I mean dead bodies were just falling from the ceiling on fire! Tell me that's not funny!… Okay I know it's not but still…

When I was done laughing at the discomfort of the men I decided to follow Link, seems like I've been doing that a lot lately. What I saw at Link's house pissed me off so much that I wanted to beat that ungrateful little monkey beater up! Talo was yelling at Colin for doing the right thing! I wanted to smack Talo soooooooooooo bad you have no idea.

"We got an ear full last night! Why did you have to tell our parents?!" He yelled at my Colin. Yes I dubbed Colin as my own, deal with it. My nails were digging into the palms of my hands as I tried to retain myself from hurting that no good…

"Hey guys," Link said, as he walked up to his fan group. Colin seemed happy to see Link and Talo seemed to forget about harassing my poor little blondie. I knew what was going to happen, and I wasn't going to stay around to watch Link pat Talo on the back after doing that to Colin. Sorry but I'm just angry at Link right now, I think I'll go join Ilia and be pissed at him. Us plot devices need to stick together don't we?

I was standing next to Ilia petting the horse's main as she brushed it and spoke to it. I talked Ilia out of keeping the gate locked just long enough for me to get in so we could both blow off some steam. Sure I don't have that great of a reason for staying mad at Link, but I didn't want to be in a friendly type mood, just because I have the right to be angry with him.

"I'm sorry about keeping you from your journey," Ilia apologized, brushing the side of Epona's rump.

"Don't worry about it, Link is being a pain." She gave me a small smile as she continued brushing the horse. Then I had a real sudden urge to sing, so that's exactly what I did. I'm not going to say I have an amazing voice, because I don't. It's just as crappy as the next person. It's just the fact that I like to sing no matter what it is other people think about my dieing moose calls. My song choice was probably not the best though. I was accidentally humming Epona's song, and that caught Ilia's attention.

"Where did you learn that song?" She asked me purely curious in how I knew Epona's song.

"What song?" I asked playing innocent. She shook her brown haired covored head as she chuckled.

"Hey Ilia, Elenya!" It was Colin, which means the jerk face of all jerk faces was right around the corner, Jack ass. "Please open the gate Link is really sorry!" How can Colin defend Link like that!?! "It wasn't even his fault though!" I walked away and sat down on the sandy strip of land as Ilia opened the gate. She is way too forgiving. What ever he says Ilia don't listen! He's one of his minions!!!!

"What do you mean?" Ilia asked letting Colin in. He retold the story of yesterday's happenings. I saw Link come over through the little hole in the side of the wall, and pretended to not notice. He was staring at me, I'm use to it by now it's like watching me is his favorite pass time. "Oh I didn't know…" Come on Ilia DON'T FORGIVE HIM!!! She apologized to him, and let him take his horse back. That's when the ground started rumbling underneath our feet, and I knew it wasn't a good sign.

"Elenya," it was Link's voice but I was too busy trying to think of what the rumbling might be.

"Do you feel that?" I asked them feeling the vibrations get stronger and stronger. What a tick isn't this the part when…? "Oh no," there right in front of me were those green monster things aiming arrows at us. I heard the twang of the bow and felt the sharp pain pierce my shoulder. A giant one came into the spring and picked me up right before I passed out from the pain, and to think I didn't even notice that Link was laying in the spring knocked out cold.

"Elenya.. Are you okay?" I know that voice, Colin? Yet again there was grass underneath my body, the only difference between this time and last time is the fact that this time I felt a shooting pain go through my shoulder that some how got bandaged. I hissed in pain before telling him that I was alright. Looking around I saw that the children were with me, well every one except for Ilia.

"What happened?" Colin looked over to the other children before retelling me what happened. Come on, I thought that I was suppose to help Link! How the heck am I suppose to help him if I'm kidnapped? I took in my surroundings to look for a weapon or something, then I saw Talo, he was holding on to Link's sword like it was a teddy bear, or like when I was holding on to Link when we were riding Epona. Crawling over to the other children I made sure that the pig like green monsters didn't notice my activity. "Pssssssssss Talo!" I hissed to the other children when I came with in hearing distance. "I need to use Link's wooden sword okay?"

He just glared at me and held it tighter to his chest.

"Look, if we're going to get out of this mess I'm going to have to fight them." I said explaining my plan to them. Once again I'm scared out of my wits, but if I don't do anything who will? I put my hand on the blade of the sword waiting for Talo to lighten his grip on the hilt, eventually he decided to go with my plan, of course it's not much of a plan, but it's all we can do till we run into Mister Healer Man.

I waited till night fall for me to make my move, I know it's dangerous but it's all that we've got… I took hold of the sword in my good hand and held it above the head of the guard that was just in front of me. Oh god please let this work! All of the other monsters were sleeping, and I was hoping to god or what ever heavenly being was up there that I wouldn't just end up waking up the others. With all the force I could muster I brought the sword down onto the monsters head. CRACK!!!!! Oh shit… that can't be good…

Link's sword was snapped in half, but the monster was knocked out, I quickly looked around looking at the monsters that surrounded us, they were all still asleep. Wow they're heavy sleepers! I quietly dropped the other half of Link's sword and snuck away leading the children away from the 'campsite'. Looking up I saw the moon was starting to fall and that's when I had the kids start running trying to get to the village as fast as possible, little did I know that Beth was shot through her leg and she couldn't move very fast. When I noticed her fall behind I went to her and had her to jump on my back. I know it hurt her, but we were able to keep moving faster and at this rate we'd be in the village by sun rise. Let's just hope that Zant hasn't gotten to it yet.

I was thankful when I saw the path way to the village wasn't blocked by a black and yellow wall of twilight. We were all exhausted, but we were almost in a safe zone, and the sun was almost up. I lead the group of children into a narrow pathway between two giant walls of rock.

"How much longer Elenya?" Colin asked me fear still visible in his eyes.

"I'm not sure." I said as I slowed my pace. I'm pretty sure the only thing keeping Beth awake was the pain in her calf, just like the pain in my shoulder was throbbing just like it's been doing for the past twelve hours. "But I think we're almost there." Hoping would be a better word for what I was feeling. At least this was a sign that we were approaching death mountain, we could all see the smoke coming from it for a while now, but only lately did I realize that I could actually see most of the mountain meaning we're close to our destination.

Our exhaustion was getting to us and it was slowing down our pace tremendously. I stopped walking when I noticed the children were so far behind me. I took their catching up time as a blessing so I could rest a little. In order for me to rest Beth had to get off my back though. Sitting down with my back against the wall, I waited for the rest of my group. Blood was oozing out of my wounded shoulder though the makeshift bandage. Malo was the last one to catch up but once we were all together again we kept walking. Finally, we arrived.

A dark skinned boy was in the distance, and just as long as he could get help, that was fine with me. "Hey! Boy!" I yelled with what ever energy I had left, I was loosing blood, fast, and we all need to be attended to. "Get some help!" I called. He turned to us, then ran into a large building. The last thing I remember was someone calling my name before I went black form lack of blood and energy.

Pain, it's all that went through my head as I tried to sit up in a bed that I was in. Great more pain. My whole entire upper body was stiff from sleeping on a mattress. The pain in my shoulder wasn't as bad as it was before, but it still hurt like a she-dog. I opened my eyes only to find an empty room that I've never seen before. The walls seemed to be plain and old fashioned like from the walls of the houses in Ocarina of Time. Stiffly I swung my legs over the edge of the mattress only to realize that my legs were in pain too, probably from walking so much. The kids!

A rush of worry came over me, I can't say I forgot all my pain, but the worry definitely did dull it. It was dulled enough for me to be able to move quickly through out the building I was standing in.

"Colin! Talo! Beth! Malo! Are you guys here?!" I called out into the quiet building.

"They're outside, and you should still be in bed." A gentle yet strong voice told me. I spun around to see a pleasantly plump woman holding a broom and looking at me. Her hair was a dark brown that matched the color of her eyes, and her skin was a dark tan. The woman's clothes were very different from the ones in Ordon (A/N HA I SPELT IT WRITE THIS TIME!), they almost seemed like an Aztec style, or a Native American. Some how she reminded me of my mother; which is funny because she looks nothing like my mom except for the pleasantly plump part. Well it was that she looked fat, it was the fact that she looked like she had about seven kids. It was a very nice look, I think so at least.

"Are they alright?!" I asked panicked about their condition.

"They are fine. You sleep now." She said pointing to the room I woke up in. I dragged myself back into the room but refused to go back to sleep, at least not on the bed. I stole the sheets, pillows, and blankets from the mattress and put them on the ground. Once my head hit the pillow I was asleep again.

Why does my face sting? Pavement, not the floor of the room I was just in, oh please no! I'm not here again am I?!?! Opening my eyes I saw the sidewalk of my school stretch out beyond and the nice shiny white shoes of Brendan.

"Can you go twenty four hours with out hurting yourself?" He asked warily eyeing me. I groaned from pain and frustration. Great now I'm not just in pain here I'm also in pain in Hyrule. Can my life get any worse right now?!

"I'm fine thanks for asking," I responded to his smart ass remark as I pushed myself up of the pavement. Damn, I still have to take that stupid test! When I got to my feet I saw my papers scattered all over the ground soaked and covered with little dots of blood. "Oh and to answer your other question, no I tried, actually my brothers and I took a tally on how many times I'd hurt myself. Thirty times." Okay don't talk, talking hurts. I must really look like crap right now. I tried my best to pick up the soggy papers and the blood stained binder. Sadly once the papers touched my fingers they broke into tiny little pieces. God I hate my life.

The bell was ringing and we were the only ones still outside.

"Shit! We're going to be late for class!" I yelled making a run for the entrance. I kept running, didn't really see the point, I had Math first and I was already going to be late so what was the point? Well anyway I kept running till I slid into my chair next to Leah.

"Oh my god Mickey what the hell happened?! You look like shit!" She exclaimed too loudly, I love her but is the yelling really needed? No of course not, but she does it anyway. I took the test and failed, I don't even need to know what my actual score was I just know that AI failed, want to know why? Because I kept thinking about Hyrule and the kids. I'm still worried, even though I know that they're alright.

I have Gym next and guess what?! We're playing Volleyball! It's probably the only sport in the world that I'm actually good at playing. The net was all set up and it was girls against boys, did I mention that Andrew is in my class? Well I just did. He's in my class on the other team and he kept giving me weird looks. We both went to the front line to play offence and that's when he asked me.

"What the hell happened to your face?" Was he smiling? That son of -

"I looked at you and it broke." I stated ready to play. Okay so you know how I can play volleyball? Well Just because I can doesn't mean that the other girls in my class can. Next thing I know I hear some one calling heads up and felt the hard volleyball come in contact with my skull.

Okay, what was the point in going back? There wasn't one unless.

"Oh you sly devil you," I said to the ceiling. What ever heavenly being there maybe they just wanted me to take the Math test and screw my life over a little bit more didn't they? God my job is really starting to give me a headache, literally.


	8. Series of Unfortunate Events

**HEY EVERY ONE!!!! I just wanted you guys to know that I have been having some major writers block and the only way to get ride of writers block for me is to let me kill some of my characters off. An I know I promised a long story but I just wanted you guys to know that I don't have the patience to type up a chapter just to not update unless the chapter is like two sentences long. Oh and this time I'm actually going to ask all of my lovely readers to review and not just the ones that want to because the more reviews I have the more I'm wanting to write so review the story please and thankyou!!!!! Love you! **

Oh yeah and I chnaged my Pen name to Killer of MarySues hehehehe I hope that doesn't give too much away about my future plans..

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Chapter 6 Series of unfortunate Events

Days like this make me miss winter. The sun is too freaking bright I'm starting to get a headache and I keep choking on the dust that the freakishly warm air keeps blowing. With the sun beating my back like this I think it's safe to say I'm going to be sun burnt for a few days. Kakoriko Village is now on my most hated places list. God I'm really starting to hate this place. There's a good side to this place though, there's no bugs! Thank the sweet Lord. If I had to see a bug and be in this much torment I would kill myself and everyone around me. It doesn't help that it's that time of the month either. Do you know how hard it is to stay out of the water on days like this?! It's like putting a cookie in front of a fat kid! (AN: Just letting you people know that I don't have anything against fat kids. Okay ANYWAY….)

"Hey beautiful!" Great, will that stupid Gary Stu leave me alone! Yes there is in fact a Gary Stu in the village. Thankfully he gets killed by all those monsters in the game so you never get the chance to meet him. I'm not so lucky though. His name is Kehoe and he's the son of the most amazing woman in Hyrule… Okay that's a lie, he's not Impa's son, but that would be awesome! No he's Zira's son. Zira is the woman that helps me from time to time, and with out her I'd probably be a murderer right now. Seriously she's the only thing keeping me sane. I remember when I first met her son…

______________________________________________________________________

"Hey Zira!" I called out to the dark skinned woman who took care of me in my dire time of need. I guess you can call her the Nanny of the village, I think she's Ranardo's sister. Anyway she saw me dressed in the same type of clothing that the natives here where. Yes I call them natives, I really don't know what else to call them considering how they are like a completely different race of human.

"How are you my friend!" She called back to me her hands gently folded in front of her and standing next to Luda. Zira has got to be the most motherly person I have ever met in my life, and I'm not even kidding. She is kind and gentle to everyone, Uli would like her. It's a shame that she…

"I'm good! How about you?" A gentle smile stretched across her aged face. It wasn't like she looked much older than Mr. Voodoo, I know I need to pick a name for him and stay with that one name but oh well I'll call him whatever I want to call him. Sorry I got off track, anyway my point is she doesn't look a lot older than him, just by maybe three years or so.

"I am content. Have you met my son yet?" I shook my head in response; which is probably the worst mistake of my teenaged life. "He should be up on the watch tower," Being the stupid idiot that I am I ran up to the roof of the building to go and meet him, I'm not shy, me being shy is impossible, but God I wish I were. Gently jogging up the stairs of the bomb shop and getting a very loud yell from the owner of the shop for running through there, I get to the slope and start walking up that.

Once I got to the end of my mini-journey, I saw a very good looking boy. His hair is a dark brown and his skin was the same color as Mr. Voodoo's and his mother's. The boy was standing close to the edge holding a man eating chicken. I think he was going to jump off, but he never actually got around to it because of me. Oh well, better I distracted him than him braking his neck legs and every other bone in his body from the fall. Well at least that's what I thought at the time. Now I keep wishing that I just let him jump.

"Hey! You're not gonna jump are you?" I asked in a really loud voice. He jumped and let go of the chicken… Over the edge… poor chicken…

"Why the hell did you do that?!" He yelled at me before turning around. The boy was clinging on to the wooden post next to him for dear life.

"Why not?" I asked innocently fluttering my eyelashes, I was joking around and pretending to flirt with him, but apparently jokes don't exist in Hyrule so he actually thought I was being serious. "Are you Zira's son?" I inquired him sneaking a peek over the edge of the building. I don't know why anyone would want to jump from up here.

"Yes, are you the girl my uncle saved?" You know the guy who plays Caspian from Narnia? Well he sounds just like this kid, all proper and Spanish. Yeesh. Oh want to know another reason why I'm an idiot? Because I started copying his accent. Didn't work out too well.

"One of them," What bothers me the most is that this guy just stood there checking me out and he didn't even bother hiding that he was doing it! A smirk came on to his face before bowing to me.

"My name is Kehoe, and name do you have? Oh beautiful Lady?"

"That, my friend, is none of your business." I told him before making a U turn to head back.

_________________________________________________

…Ever since then he's been a pain in my ass, and hasn't left me alone. Unless his mother is around of course, but I'm not counting that because as gentle as she maybe with everyone else in the world, she is one scary woman in the eyes of her son. Trust me, that, I am truly one hundred percent thankful for.

"Leave me alone you idiot," I grumbled at him, tying my brown hair up and off my back. Kehoe was pretty much breathing down the back of my neck. At least he was creating some shade for me. He better run before I murder him. This heat was not doing my attitude any good, nor was the dust that he kicked up while running over to me.

"Hi Kehoe!" God bless you Beth! As many Gary Stus do, being amazingly attractive as they are, Beth has developed a little crush on the dark skinned boy and just as he wouldn't leave me alone, she wouldn't leave him alone. I swear I heard him growl at her softly before turning around so she could speak with him, or he could go give her false hope, either or I'm not really too sure.

"Greetings Beth, how are you this beautiful day?" He asked her, I could hear him say through gritted teeth. Ha-ha that's what you get for being a Stu, JackAss. Turning around I saw her take his hand and drag him into the Sanctuary telling him that there was something that he had to see. When I saw a bug in Kehoe's place I freaked. I hate bugs, I really do, you have absolutely no clue how much. When I was younger I use to love them but now… Not so much. Suddenly I realized how familiar the bug looked, there were strange symbols all over it and it was a strange yellow color. That's when it hit me, first comes bugs, then comes screams, then there's monster Twili. Oh shit, not good! Not good! FALL BACK!!

To tell you the truth I don't know how I felt, being a none Mary Sue and standing underneath a twilight portal. It was the weirdest feeling I have ever had before. The wind started picking up and that's when I realized now would be a good time to go get everyone to go inside.

"EVERYONE GO INSIDE! NOW!" I screamed as black monsters started falling out of the red and black portal above my head. The sky suddenly became dark and everyone started scurrying around. I started counting heads once I got into the sanctuary, everyone that I personally knew was there minus Burns… Well everyone except for…

"Mother!" Kehoe called out to Zira, who was standing there in front of the monsters with a bow in hand. As she drew an arrow the wind started picking up and the monster's attention was caught by the brave soul in front of them. The sight I saw was one I was hoping I wouldn't have to see as long as I was here. When the arrow was released from the tension of the bow, one of the monsters were hit, but it seemed unaffected by the blow. Burns ran up behind her and handed her bombs which she tied to her arrows, to combined the blow and hopefully bring the monsters down. I knew I should have helped them, but I couldn't. I don't even remember being able to breathe because of how scared I was at that one moment. The fear that took me over was much greater than any I have ever felt before in my life. What happened next… I… I can't even…

I started crying and backed away. My sobs became loud as I felt a small hand touch my shoulder, how pathetic I was. How much pain… Zira.

"It'll be alright Elenya." Colin's soft voice said as he hugged me. A wave of helplessness over came me and my wailing stopped, but my tears just kept coming.

"I…. I'll be okay Colin." I said wiping the wetness from my face before thanking my little friend. "Kehoe… I-"

"Don't even say it." He snapped at me. I wanted to hug him or something, I wanted to make his pain go away, but how the hell was I going to do that if my pain wasn't lost yet? "Now isn't the time to mourn over the dead. Now's the time to protect what we have left." He growled. It wasn't till that moment that I realized how quickly things can go from good, to bad, to worse, and then the worst. A boy a year or so older than me… Just became an orphan before my eyes.

Kehoe started towards the door, but right when his hand touched the handle Ranardo's called out in a quiet voice.

"What do you expect to happen once you leave this sanctuary?" Luda stood next to him in quiet confusion. She had no clue what was actually happening. All the other children knew though. You could tell by the looks of agony on there small faces. Beth was actually crying so hard she was shaking. These poor children… Going through this at such a young age… "Do you expect to go out there and destroy those beasts? Do not loose your self in anger Kehoe. Your mother will be avenged, but right now we must wait."

"Wait?! How can we wait?! Our village is being ripped to pieces and the best idea you have is wait." The fire in his eyes was frightening, the fierce raw anger shined through his eyes like the light of a flame shines through glass. The tears in the room were uncontrollable. Mine finally ceased, and now I just felt numb. I threw him away from the door before he could do something stupid.

"Kehoe, wait. Please. Help will come…" I whispered my eyes started stinging again from tears prickling at my eyes. Stepping back to see his brown irises looking into mine was almost bitter sweet, the anger that was shown actually made tears fall and slide down my cheeks, and the tears in my eyes made him loose some of the anger that was in his soul.

"There's nothing nobody else can do!" Burns exclaimed hiding beneath the window acting like a scout…

Hey wait a minute! When did he get in here?!

"Those monster's didn't seem very impressed with my bombs!" he said shivering in fear his fire mask slammed down on his face. I would have laughed if I weren't in this situation, "You all saw what they did! My bombs didn't even hurt them! They're gonna find us then, then they're gonna-"

"BURNS!" Ranardo and I yelled at the same time making Beth cry even harder into her hands. Colin put his hand on her shoulder only to get it shrugged off.

"Don't worry Beth. Link will come save us." Link… He's suppose to be here right now… Watching us. I looked up at the roof and saw a hole at the top, how is it none of us even noticed that?! Directly underneath the hole, is where Link is, with Midna. " I know it!" I finally broke away from Kehoe, to go over and give Colin my support knowing he needed it.

"I know he will too." I said in a quiet voice. Link, please don't let us be wrong…

Time passed, and all we did was wait. I sat in Kehoe's lap half the time, or used his shoulder as a pillow. I'm not sure exactly how long it was before the sky started to get bright again, but it was way over due. We looked outside and saw that the monsters were gone, and sadly, so wasn't Zira's body. I'm still finding it hard to believe that every thing that happened this morning was real. Taking Kehoe's hand, I lead him out of the sanctuary and into the sun. Even though the sun was still obnoxiously hot, I enjoyed it. I was happy this time, because this time I saw a very welcomed face, but what I saw almost threw me into shock.

Let's just say Link wasn't exactly alone… Actually you know what, I'll just tell you what I saw so you don't have to wait all that long. Next to him was a girl with pitch black hair, pointy ears, and beautiful pale skin. Her eye's shined like green emeralds against the sun. All in all, she looked like a full time killer of sanity, which is what her race is meant for. No I don't mean Hylian! I mean the species all of us readers hate… Mary Sue…


	9. Mary Sue, meet Gary Stu

**Emma:Hey every one! I'm so very happy that I have actually gotten past chapter 5! sadly I must say school is being a major pain in the ass, thankfully it's over next week which probably means writing writing and more writing because I'll have nothing better to do. Any way I hope you enjoy!**

**Oh by the Way I am PISSED OFF! and slightly depressed so yeah... you wanna know why????? well I don't care if you do or not I'm gonna tell you any way. The Legend of Zelda Movie is a FAKE!!!!!!!!!!! and I'm so pissed off about it because when I saw the preview on youtube and got all excited about it but when it never came out I was ready to shoot someone and then tonight while talking to my good ol' buddy I was like maybe it was like a Toby Kieth movie and only came out in a certain area of America where it would be most popular or something so I spent like five hours looking for it on DVD only to find out that it really was only an April Fool's joke on every one and I"m ready to kill someone!!!! *Takes out ninja stars***

**Link: Uhhhh... should I be afraid?**

**Emma: HELL YES!!! IT'S YOUR OWN FREAKING MOVIE AND YOU DIDN'T TELL ME IT WAS A JOKE!!**

**Link:*runs and hides behind Princess Zelda* Uhhh here you can hurt her vent all your anger out on her just don't hurt me!!**

**Zelda: Aren't you suppose to be protecting me?!?!?**

**Emma: From Ganon yes, but from me... No one can protect you from me...**

**Ganon: ** **True... Emma is one scary bitch...**

**Emma: Thank you my pet. Here have a cookie*gives Ganon a cookie***

**Link: I want a cookie!!!!!**

**Emma: You don't diserve one.**

**Link: Why not???**

**Emma: First off YOU DIDN'T FREAKING TELL ME ABOUT THE STUPID MOVIE!! Second, you never joined the dark side.**

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Chapter 7 Mary Sue meet Gary Stu

"LINK!" I tackled Link once he stepped out of the healing spring, well tackled him to the best of my ability any way. My shoulder is still injured, but it's almost healed. Hopefully I'll be able to go with him to the next temple, or to the mines, what ever you want to call it. He hugged me for a little while then let go of my waist. Too bad for him I wasn't going to let him go.

"Elenya, it's good to see you too, but do you think you could let go of me now?" He said in a quiet voice. I nuzzled his shoulder and took in the same old sent of hay. Just like before all this evil stuff happened. Strange, everything is going by so fast, I wish this story could just slow down a little… Maybe I can talk Link into taking a short break for a little while, believe it or not I really did miss him, I just refused to admit it out loud.

"Nope, not going to happen." I just held on to him tighter. Little did I know that there were two jealous morons glaring at our backs. Speaking of idiots… "Link, who's that girl?" my curiosity won me over, I really did want to know what her name was, well just so I could pick up some ridiculously obnoxious nick name for her.

"Um, I'm not sure what her name is…" he said looking back at the dark haired beauty. The girl had a freakish grace about her. The Hylian, stupid Mary-Sue, was still glaring daggers at me, her reasoning is completely unknown to me.

"My name his Sakira Rose Elizabeth Josephine Loretta Samantha Claire Dianne Maria Stevens." Are you kidding me??? SREJLSDMS… I gotta remember that. You know what, I think I'll just call her Srej, because there is no possible way I'm going to remember the rest of it. I let go of Link and blinked a couple of times before going back over to Kehoe, who by the way, was still glaring at Link's back.

"Wow, you have the most obnoxious name I have ever heard before in my life." You could tell she was offended. But honestly I really don't give a rats ass. "I think I'll just call you Srej."

She was about to respond but Link suddenly ran towards the mountain. Leaving the three of us behind. "Well Gary Stu meet Mary Sue, Be nice to each other, and be all romantic and perfect or whatever it is you guys do," I said before sprinting after Link. "Hey Link wait up! I need to tell you about something!" I called out to him while waving my good arm around like a mad woman. He rushed to turn around. "Link! Stop!" I tried again. "Goddamn stupid elves with their stupid stupidity!" I cursed before entering Death Mountain's trail. "You moron! Don't you know what the meaning of stop is!" I yelled at him right before he crawled over the edge of the cliff.

5... 4... 3... 2... 1... And here comes the biggest idiot in Hyrule's history falling off the cliff after getting beat up my a Goron.

"You idiot. I tried to warn you! They aren't acting like themselves. You have to be more careful." I said feeling a great need to kick him in the side to teach him a lesson. His only response a deep groan of pain. "Great now I have to drag you to Ranardo. Link, you're a imbecile." I said while trying to get him up with my good arm.

After a good five minutes of painful grunts from both of us we finally spotted Ranardo. Why couldn't he of come any closer?

"I saw you two heading this way and chased after you." Of course you did, that's why we are BOTH in pain. "The Gorons aren't acting like usual. They seem upset." Well that's the understatement of the year. When someone is upset they don't throw you off a twenty foot high cliff just because you climbed up on their property. "The only way you can get up the mountain is by wrestling them. There is only one person I know of who can defeat them in a match, and that is Bo, your town Mayor." Oh great I have to deal with that giant idiot again. Joy.

A very familiar rumble came from the ground as Elf-Boy and I walked around the corner to the village. Looking down the path I saw a herd of those stupid green pigs coming our way, a couple of those pointless monsters were on Epona's back clinging on to the saddle for dear life. They lost the battle against gravity and a very loud crack was heard as they hit the ground. Serves them right.

Once they fell off Link sprinted towards the horse in full speed in order to calm her down. I'm almost jealous of how skilled that moron is. The children were watching him with fear written all over their faces afraid that he'd fall off, Srej was watching him with worship in her eyes, and Kehoe was, well actually he sort of just vanished. I don't have a clue where he is. Too bad for him, he would have enjoyed the show.

Epona finally settled down and Srej went up to him to be all Sueish. After that I stopped paying attention to what was going on there and went looking for my Gary Stu. I will be pissed if that wanna-be whore killed him with her annoyingness. I seriously will, killing him is my job and my job alone. No that's a lie, Luda can kill him considering how they're cousins and all.

"Kehoe!" I yelled as I went around into the direction of the graveyard. Eh, dead people, I hate dead people. I love graveyards, just hate the living dead. Entering the graveyard, trying not to be killed by evil birds, I saw Kehoe's figure staring at one of the stones propped up in the sandy ground. "Hey dude you okay?" I asked as I walked up to him. No answer came from him, he just kept staring at the gravestone, which made me look at it. I don't know what that was going to accomplish though, considering how I can't read Hylian.

"My father died when I was little." The softness in his voice was astounding. I didn't even know he knew that being quiet was possible. 'Come on Mickey, be sensitive, it's one of those Gary Stu moments. At least attempt to be Sueish.' I thought to my self holding in laughter. Don't ask, I just can't keep a straight face in graveyards. Never could. My mom asked me why once, I told her it's because the dead don't like it when we cry over their deaths. She bought it though.

"I'm sorry," I mumbled, my shoulders started heaving, trying to hold in my laughter. My hands attacked my mouth trying to muffle the noise coming from me.

"I don't even remember him at all. My mom said he died of some rare sickness that no one knew the cure of." Oh God, no. My laughter was getting really hard to control. "He was one of the best warriors I have ever heard of, I remember when I was little I always wanted to be like him in every possible way. Strong, brave, handsome. Sadly, I only got one of those traits," I bowed my head and hid my face with a curtain of hair, letting some of my laughter flow. Idiot you're not helping! I never really realized how vain this guy is. Okay that's a lie, I knew how vain he is, but still. "Now I have no one." Oh shit, he's turning around. "Why are you crying Elenya, it's not that sad," actually I don't think it's all that sad at all. I know I'm a heartless bitch. I couldn't help it anymore, so I just let all my laughter flow out of me like laughing at someone becoming an orphan is a funny thing.

"Sorry, I know you must think I'm rude for laughing Kehoe, but really I find this whole world of your's hilarious." I chuckled as a strong gust blew my hair into my face. "You think just because someone died means that they're gone, and frankly I think you're an idiot for thinking that. I mean haven't you ever heard of ghosts? Plus, this world doesn't resolve around you," My eyes started to water, at this point I wasn't sure if I was crying or laughing, or did I have a clue that what I was saying actually somewhat made sense, I just felt like I needed to say it. "I don't know if you're just fishing for compliments or not, but you really are brave. Just not all too smart. Before your mother died you almost ran out of the sanctuary to go help your mother remember."

Kehoe wouldn't look at me, actually I'm pretty sure he stepped away from me. In all honesty I don't really care too much.

"Oh and by the way, you're not alone. Not sure if you remember or not but I'm still here and so aren't you uncle and cousin." With that said I turned around and walked back to the village not even thinking about how stupid I looked as I skipped out of that evil place. Hey I think the dead need to laugh at something too once in a while.

"COLIN!" someone yelled once I got to the back of the sanctuary. Oh shit! I started to sprint to the center of the village to see a sight that really pissed me off. That fat stupid giant pig leader was holding a unconscious Colin in his fist and road off with him.

"Link hold on! Take me with yo-" he left me. That stupid son of a bitch left me here! And you know what's worse? He took that stupid whore with him instead! God I hate Mary Sues!

"Ranardo! Do you have a horse?!" I yelled down the road, he nodded and Luda pointed next to one of the abandoned houses, a black horse stood there. Did I ever mention that I have two older sisters? One wanted to teach me how to ride horses, thankfully I still remember some of it. Just enough to go full speed at least. When I sprinted to it I saw a black bow and a quiver of arrows… Zira's…

Picking them up I equipped them and jumped on to the horses back and kicked it into a full gallop. Galloping at full speed I took the bow and arrow and shot the first green monster I saw. Just so you know, I actually am very good at archery, my brother Chris and I have contests all the time at home. I never win, but I'm pretty good at it. I know I'm throwing all this info at you right now, but I just wanted you guys to know that it wasn't some Mary Sueish thing that made me able to do these things. It took years of falling off of things and killing the neighbor's cats.

I kept firing more arrows praying that they wouldn't hurt Colin or Link. I don't really care about Srej. She can get hit. Actually I hope she falls off. Maybe Epona will run over her. She's not helping or anything of the sort, she's just sitting there hugging him. Eventually all the pig things were dead except for the ones on the edges, protected by the white walls. At that point there was nothing I could do but watch in horror as Epona almost got scratched by the wooden fence. Srej just jump off! You're weighing her down!

Mister Ugly Pig and Elf-boy started to joist each other on the small bridge beneath them. I was running low on arrows and used my last ones shooting the green archers, making it a fair game. Well, it was almost fair anyway.

"Srej! Just jump off!" I yelled, frantically watching from my stead's back. "SAKIRA JUST GET OFF THE STUPID HORSE!" Once again the moron just completely ignored me. Epona almost got knocked off the bridge because she just barely moved out of the way. "SAKIRA! YOUR SLOWING DOWN EPONA! GET OFF!" The Giant Green Pig's back was facing me giving me a clear shot. After ripping one of my used arrows from one of my victim's backs, I took aim and fired. It arched backwards in pain and gave Link the perfect opportunity to stab him.

When the boar felt that his rider had diapered, and by disappeared I mean fall off dead, he stopped running, giving us, and by us I mean Link, a chance to cut Colin down from the post he was tied to. Finally, he's safe.

Colin road with me on my horse once Link got over to me. The whole ride I was making sure to make sure I didn't drop him. Neither of us spoke a word to each other the whole ride back. I'm pretty sure the two of them knew I was pissed off at them. Srej because she almost got Link and Colin killed, and Link because he took her with him in the first place. She was just dead weight the whole time. Completely useless! I'm going to kill her I swear it! I'm going to kill her before she destroys Hyrule.

We got back safely with out any problem. I handed Colin over to Link with a glare and started to silently stalk off. It was only when I walked passed Srej that I spoke.

"If you want someone to die, then go kill yourself. Don't put everyone else's lives at risk." I hissed at her with a glare before hitting her shoulder with my own as I passed her.

Hours passed, and night was coming around, but I still refused to get down from the watch tower. My mood got a little better, but I'm still pissed and I'm still angry at the two of them. If Link didn't want to play the hero then it wouldn't be so hard to save people, but he always needs to bring a girl with him for the ride doesn't he? Girls that he's pretty sure will be completely defenseless. Just like the time Talo ran off after that monkey, it's exactly the same…

"Elenya?" No, I'm not talking to you. You need to learn a lesson. "What's wrong?" Just leave me alone you jerk. "Are you angry at me?" What the hell do you think Elf-Boy? You brought a completely defenseless girl onto a battle field! You didn't even have the decency to give her a weapon first! I just glared at him giving him my answer.

Link sat down besides me and looked over the town as the sun began to set behind us, making the village look even more red than it usually is during the day time. We sat there in silence for about five minutes, Elf-Boy's body language told me he wanted to tell me something, but he wasn't going to.

"You're an idiot," I whispered bringing my eyes up from looking around the town to look at the sky searching for the night's first star. I saw his bland head turn in my direction. He was either surprised that I spoke, or he was confused at my accusation. Not sure, but I refused to look him in the eyes. Actually scratch that, I refused to look at him at all. "You brought a completely stupid, idiotic, selfish girl on to a battle field when she can't even defend herself." More silence came and the sky turned from a dark orange to a beautiful shade of violet. "Do you always have to try so hard to play the hero? What the hell were you thinking? That you'll always be able to protect more than just one person at a time, plus yourself? You, Colin, and Srej would have died if I didn't follow you."

"I'm sorr-" he started, but I cut him off before he could finish.

"Don't be sorry, be smart. Think things through before you go kill yourself. You know, despite what you might want to believe, I'm not always going to be there fighting next to you." The stars started to shine brighter as the moon rose and the last tints of blood red vanished beneath the horizon. "One of these days you're going to get people killed. What then? Do you think you can just shrug off their deaths?" What am I talking about? Am I even making any sense?

"Elenya, who was that boy with the dark hair you were holding hands with earlier today?" You're joking… You're freaking joking! I faced him for the first time in about a week, and looked at him with an expresion of complete disbelief. "I saw him talking with Sakira earlier, and I thought that may-" a loud smack could be heard through out the whole town. Link gingerly touched the red spot on his cheek where I slapped him. "This has absolutely nothing to do with Kehoe!" I yelled at him angered that he would think that the whole reason why I was angry was just because I was jealous of that stupid Sue. "This is about two of my friends almost dieing because you had some stupid idea about playing hero! It's about you putting someone's life on the line just so you can pet your ego some more! Well you know what Link?! You're not a hero! You're just some stupid teenaged boy who can't get it through his thick skull that people are actually dieing!"

My chest was heaving from all the yelling I was doing, and he just sat there in a stunned silence still holding his injured cheek. "We are leaving for Ordan tomorrow, and by 'we' I mean you and me. No Srej, no Kehoe. No more innocent by standers are going to be dragged into this." I stood up stiffly glaring at him the whole time. "I'm going to bed and I suggest you do the same thing too."

I entered the hotel and went to the room I was currently sharing with Beth. When I saw her sleeping form I laid down onto the floor and cried myself to sleep. Little did I know Beth wasn't asleep as I hissed into the silent night, "Stupid Link."

I hate him. It's official, I hate him. I hate that goddamned elf! That no good son of a bitch left me here! He left on his own, only trace that he was actually here was the note I had Ranardo read for me.

Dear Elenya,

You're right, what I did was foolish and I'm not going to drag anyone into this. I'm sorry for acting like an idiot yesterday. By the time you read this I'm probably going to be on my way to the village, I wanted to tell you yesterday that the whole time you and the kids were missing it was you who I worried about the most. I'm not going to drag you into this any farther. I hope to see you soon.

-Link

He's an idiot! When I said don't drag anyone into this I meant everyone else! I'm already part of it you stupid moron!

"Ranardo, do you have any arrows?" I asked packing a bag of traveling food and a change of clothes.

"Yes, am I correct to assume that you are going after him?" I nodded as Luda went to go get me some arrows for my journey. Link is such a pain in the ass seriously! I now know why he isn't the triforce of wisdom, he's a complete moron… But he's my moron I guess.

The horse I road yesterday has become my own noble steed and I called him Sheik. Yes I named him after the most awesome Hylian ninja, sue me. With the sun barely raising I packed the saddle bags and was ready to go. Once I got on I road south, back to Ordon, where all this stupidity all started.

* * *

**Just reminding all of you dearies to review, fore with out reviews I feel the need to not write, besides I'd like it if I could get to 40 reviews before chapter 9... so thanks you guys are great!**


	10. Mix up my Ass

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Chapter 7 Mix up My Ass!

I've been Riding Sheik for about an hour now, and frankly I'm starting to be in great pain. I'm so sore it's like I've been sent to hell for no reason what so ever. I swear to god, once I catch up with Link I'm going to kill him. You know what, no I won't, I'll castrate him instead. But then again it's not like he needs anything down south anyway considering how he doesn't ever actually like anyone… Maybe he's gay…

Thankfully I haven't had a need to use any of my arrows yet. I ran over at least five of those purple monster thingies when they tried to attack me while I was still riding on my horse. Is everything in Hyrule idiotic?

The ride back to Ordan didn't take nearly as long as I thought it would. Sheik is one fast horse. Nothing compared to Epona, but he's still really fast. Once I stepped into the woods it felt like it's been for ever, when really it was only just about week. I never thought it was possible to miss a place so much. Sheik cantered down the long narrow paths that lead to the clearing I first met Link at, and suddenly I felt the need to be hugged. Or at least talk to Link about something. I almost want to apologize for what I said to him. I guess I over reacted a little, but it was a lesson he needed to learn.

Ordan was so quiet, it's almost depressing. You would have thought that some one di-… That's right, they don't know we survived do they? All the villagers probably think that all of their children died. No one was out of their house, and it's such a beautiful day out. When I noticed Epona being parked out in front of Ilia's house, I sprinted. So freaking close to Link I could almost feel his stupidity. Yeah, I have a stupidity radar inside my brain. It's actually pretty cool, but it's also hell at the same time. Can you imagine being able to feel other peoples stupidity? It's like feeling your brain slowly melt into mush. Maybe Hulu is really taking over my brain… Nah, they don't know about this place anyway, so I think I'm safe.

Anyway, back to the point. When I saw Epona I quickly went to Bo's house preparing a speech and everything for when I see Link. Right before I entered I put my scary face on, usually it would scare my older brothers, so just imagine what it would do to Elf-Boy. Once I was prepared to scare the hell out of Link, I opened the door, and my oh so scary pissed off expression fell when I saw that no one was there. Looking around I noticed everything was just the way it has always been… Well to my knowledge at least.

"Hey! Anyone home?" I yelled into the house. I listened quietly for a response and heard what sounded like a grunt. "Hello?" I said a little quieter getting an even louder grunt from the back room. Ilia never actually let me back there when ever I came over so I never really cared about it. "Link?"

I peeked into the back room and saw an image I hope I never see again in my life. Mayor Bo, big fat Mayor Bo, was wrestling Link… Shirtless. Do you know how pale that man is?!?!?! Being fat and pale isn't attractive, at all. Well, maybe to someone else, but for me it's just disturbing. So me finding the image of Link and Bo pretty much hugging each other made me do something loud and obnoxious…

"OH MY 'insert beep here' GOD! PUT A 'beep' SHIRT ON!" yes, I yelled at them and swore at them. What can I say, I'm still pissed off at Link and now I'm sore beyond belief from horse back riding for an hour. I think I have a right to yell.

My yelling at them only got Link's attention, so he pretty much became road kill because Bo ran him over then threw him out of the ring… Hard, really hard. He was thrown out so hard he went flying a good five feet and then landed with a grunt.

"You know Link, if you can't beat Bo there's no way in hell you'll be able to beat the Gorons." I said smartly putting my hands on my hips and smirking before going over to him. Link groaned in pain as he tried to get up from the nice rock solid floor that just collided with his back only a few moments ago. Too bad for him I wasn't about to show him any mercy. He doesn't deserve it. He really doesn't. "By the way Idiot, next time you decide to leave me behind, make sure I can't follow you." I was now standing next to him waiting for him to say something in response. "Well?"

Hissing he stood up straight rubbing his soon to be bruised back. He looked at me with guilt in his eyes and started to bite his lower lip. I'm not sure if he was being nervous about saying something to me, or if he was just in pain. All I know is that he got back up and 'walked' back over to the ring and looked up at Bo.

"She's right you know, if you don't beat me there's no way you'll be able to beat them. Let's try again." Link nodded, his red and starting to bruise back facing me. Oh I'm going to enjoy this. Little did I know that at the beginning of the wrestling it was tradition to stomp, and it was too late when I realized that when a fat man stomps he jiggles. No seriously, he was like Jell-O, pasty, nasty, white Jell-O. Yeah, let's not think about it any more it's making me gag.

I turned away from the scene so I would stop gagging, at least professional sumo wrestlers from earth aren't pasty white, the only way I can describe it is like watching Fat Bastard from Austin Powers: Gold Member. You know how he's Scottish and pasty and freaking huge, just like now except Bo isn't Scottish or whatever. It was only when I heard grunting and slapping when I turned around. I don't think I've ever laughed so hard in my life, reason being Link was being bitch slapped by Bo, over and over again. It's freaking hilarious.

Know how earlier I was telling you how I could feel the stupidity from Link melting my brain? Well I wasn't exaggerating, if I was then I wouldn't have been standing next to the ring; which Link was once again thrown out of, but this time he gave a fight so instead of landing five feet away from the ring he landed on top of me, and me being the complete klutz I am, ended up smacking my head on the rock flooring. Last thing I heard was a sickening crack, and my head never hurt more.

_______________________

I'm not sure if where I was is real or not, honestly I don't even know where my concussion landed me. I couldn't see anything other than completely darkness and water, well and myself of course.

"Where the hell am I?" I asked the empty space surrounding me. If this is my subconscious then I'm more simple than I thought.

"I am sorry for the pain that we have caused you but believe me when I say it was necessary…" A deep voice echoed in the emptiness. A bright light came from behind me and I turned around shocked at the brightness, causing me to fall down onto the water… but not into it… wow this place is weird. "Do not be afraid. I shall not hurt you Lost One," Strangely I could see passed the bright light to see a golden goat staring at me. Great it's bad enough that I'm hallucinating, but now animals are talking to me. Most people wouldn't talk back to a talking animal, but I'm me and this animal looks like it could kill me by stepping on me once, it's huge! "And to answer your question, you are in the Spirit realm. This is where we, the other Great Spirits and I, watch over Hyrule. If you don't believe me look down."

"I'll take your word for it, I'm not a huge fan of heights. And don't worry about hurting me, it happens when there's a war, people die." Of course what I thought he- It meant by hurting me was when he made people die before my eyes.

"Lost One, I am sorry about that as well, but that is not what I meant by hurting you."

"Say Wha?"

"As you may know by now, when you go from your world to Hyrule you need your mind to momentarily shut down."

"You mean my concussions don't you?" My face screamed 'you have got to be kidding me'. It's nod answered my question.

"In a panic to save Hyrule, we accidentally sent you here, Lost One. No need to worry though, the one that shall help the chosen one defeat this great evil is now here."

"You lost me," This is like trying to listen to Andrew explaining World of War Craft; which he has tried to do on several occasions, completely useless and pointless. "Are you trying to say that this is all one giant mix up?" Once again the freakish talking goat nodded it's head. "Meaning I'm not suppose to be here?" Nod, "Then who the hell?… SREJ! THAT STUPID MARY-SUE!!!" Wow, I'm not sure if I'm angry or just depressed. Talk about not being wanted. After a minute of me rambling on about how I hate her I finally just stopped and turned back to the Golden Animal. "What's going to happen to me then?"

"You will remain in Hyrule until the Chosen One saves the rest of the spirits of Hyrule. Then we will have enough power to send you back. For your own safety Michelle, leave this to the Chosen Ones,"

"Hell no. Link can't do this on his own. I won't let him. No matter what it takes. Next time you choose to steal some one from their world make sure you got the right person." The expression on the Spirit's face was sorrowful, as if he knew something horrible will happen.

" If that is what you wish." A greater light started to shine from between it's antlers and it blinded me, then suddenly the water was no longer holding me up, but dragging me down instead.

_______________

Shooting up while gasping for breath, I once again hit my head against something hard. This time I was almost thankful for the pain though, because I knew that I was home this time. When I opened my eyes and saw fierce blue ones staring back in relief, I had my proof.

"Elenya are you okay? You've been out for an hour." I could feel a smile slowly creep onto my face as I continued to look at him.

"Never better," And for once I think I was actually telling the truth. A small smile showed up onto his face before he helped me up off of the rock flooring. We walked out of the Mayor's house, side by side, to our horses. "Oh Link, you got the secret weapon from Bo right?" Link just nodded his head before we got on our horses and left Ordan. _________________

"Link, do you have a crush on anyone?" I asked bored of the silence between us on our trip back to the village. Besides, my future threats depends on his answer.

"Crush?"

"Yeah you know, secretly infatuated with anyone." I said hoping that I worded it correctly. His face went bright red, and he started choking on his spit or something. In that order. "Ooooh Link has a crush! Tell me tell me!" I said bouncing up and down in my saddle like a little girl, only to get Sheik to angrily snort at doing damage to his back. "Sheik cry me a bridge and get over it. So, Link who is she?" I asked with a sly smile on my face.

"W-well, I-if I told you it wouldn't be a secret now would it?" I turned my lips into a childish pout before sticking my tongue out at him. He just laughed at my childish antics. Once we got to Kakoriko Bridge I threw Sheik into a full out gallop before yelling 'race ya' over my shoulder to Link. Epona and Link quickly caught up with us, and once they did I yelled at Sheik to go faster while laughing.

We turned the corner into the Village and we slowed down declaring it a tie, even though we both know I won. I just wanted to sooth his ego… Okay he won and he was just being nice so he said that it was a tie. THERE I SAID IT!!! GET OFF MY CASE!! Epona and Sheik were panting as if they never ran so hard before, and they probably haven't.

"Elenya! You're back! I thought you left me for ever my love!" My eye twitched at the thought of me being anyone's 'love'.

"Kehoe you ever call me that again I swear to Go-Din that I will castrate you." Suddenly I was tackled to the dusty ground my two children. "Well hello." I said once I could breathe again. I saw Beth and Talo on top of me.

"Elli, your so mean! I thought that you left us here for good!" Beth said with tears in her eyes. Since when was I Elli? "I thought that you and Link weren't going to come back for us…" Tears started to pour down her face.

"Aw, Honey, I'd never just leave you alone. Ranardo was here with you. Besides someone had to tell your parents that all of you are alright." She nodded hugged me once more and let me get up off of the dirt ground. Once I got up I turned my head and saw Ranardo with his daughter standing next to the sanctuary in their calm demeanor. He just nodded to me in what I like to think was respect. He moved aside and let my little blue eyed soldier come out.

Colin walked over to me with the same soft face I saw him with last night. His blue eyes shined with admiration, for who I'll never know. Okay that's a lie, the admiration is for Link, it's not that hard to figure out, but still.

"Thank you," Colin said as he bowed down in front of me.

"Uh, your welcome?"

"Link told me about how you saved me, I owe you my life," I blinked a few times before finally having what he said process.

"What are you talking about?! Link saved your life not me! I just helped out every now and then. Really what I did was nothing!"

"Come on Elenya, if you weren't there I would have died and you know it." Link said attacking me with his fierce blue orbs. I turned to him, glaring.

"We'll talk about this later," He gave a deep sigh as he headed to the hotel. Jackass.

________________________________________________________

"Link, why the hell did you tell Colin that I saved him?" I asked angrily at him, why am I angry? Oh simply because Link gave me the credit for something he did. Sure he's completely right about me saving his little ass, but still that's not the point. The point is that he was suppose to take the credit, and he was the one that was supposed to do all that crazy stuff. On his own. If it wasn't for stupid Srej then there wouldn't be a need for me… Man that's a depressing thought.

"Because you did," He was sitting in the hot spring resting his head on a rock pillar. "If you didn't show up I would have died."

"No you wouldn't have! You little idiot!" I was waste deep into the water, my tunic was washed and now I was wearing it as water clothes. We decided we would take a break from the hero business just long enough to heal our bruises and our cuts, for me it was more along the lines of calming my sore muscles. "I only followed you because you brought Srej along with you! If you went on your own there wouldn't have been a need," I sat down in a shallow area of the hot spring letting the hot water cover my shoulders. " I know you can protect yourself. I'm not an idiot, if you couldn't protect yourself then we would all be dead right now. You saved us from those black monsters." My eyes looked up at the sky and I saw the red tint of the sky over head. " Why did you take Srej with you anyway…"

There was a moment of silence before he spoke his answer to my rhetorical question.

"Because she helped me fight. I needed to find something in the Forest Temple before I could come find you guys." My eyes found their way back to Link's face and I saw him staring back at me. His never ending gaze scared me, he really does have pretty eyes though. "I found her in the most dangerous room of the temple. Believe it or not she's very good with a sword.." I snorted in disbelief, I mean seriously? Srej doesn't even look like she can handle a tennis racket. " I guess I just thought that she would have helped me."

"I thought that's what I was for," Suddenly he got up and moved over to me, once he got to me he forcefully grabbed me by the shoulders and looked my in eye. I wasn't sure if I should be scared or shocked. "Link…"

"Don't even think that I don't appreciate what you've done for me. The only reason why I didn't take you to save Colin was because I didn't want you to get hurt." I refused to look at him, instead I looked off to the side.

"You did though… More than you know. When you took her instead of me… I…" I shut my eyes and took a deep breath. Trying to get off the subject that I know we didn't have to dwell on. This is stupid of me. "You know, let's just drop it. It wasn't that important." He let go of my shoulders and sat next to me. We watched the sun go down together as we just soaked in the clear water. I think this is the most at ease I've been in a long time. Then Link, being the idiot he is had to ruin my serenity.

"Did you learn anything from your past?" Oh shit, not this again. I felt my body tense, and I felt like I was about to have a nervous break down… Well maybe I can tell the truth.

"No," see it's the truth, I'm not learning about the past… wait no that's a lie. "Actually I did learn something," this grabbed even more of his attention than I could have possibly wanted. Ah great Mickey, what did you just get yourself into? "Srej and I were found by you for the same reason. Not sure what that reason is just yet, but still it's something right?" I tucked my legs in wrapped my arms around them and rested my head on my knees, so my face was looking towards him. "Why are you doing all of this?"

This time it was his turn to freeze. I know it's bad of me to put him on the spot like this, but it's going to make me feel better about what I have to do in order to keep him from finding out what's really going on.

"W-well s-someone has to right? I mean, what do you think would happen if I didn't?" He doesn't want to know.

"I think I would have one less friend." I guess what I said really got to him or something, because he didn't say anything after that.

"Hey Link get the hell away from my girl!" Damn him… That stupid Kehoe. He was just outside of the hot spring glaring hell at him. If looks could kill Link would be dead right now and I'd have to save Hyrule all on my lonesome. That would suck ass.

"Damn it Kehoe! How many times do I have to tell you! I'm not your girl! I don't like you that way and I never will!" That arrogant smirk of his just spread on his face like wild fire.

"Your just saying it because you're in denial. You love me more than life it's self! You think the sun rises and sets for me."

"No I think the sun rises and sets for Hyrule. Now go before how I hurt you." His smirk grew into a smile and a false soft look came into his eyes as he opened up his arms.

"Oh my Love! Come here and give your future husband a kiss." Okay that's it! I got up swiftly and stalked over to him.

"You really want a kiss? I mean if I kiss you will you leave me alone?"

"Of course my love." I gave him a false loving look and told him to shut his eyes. Once he did I curled my hand into a fist and kissed it. Kehoe started to pucker his lips next thing you know he was on the ground with a black eye..

"That's something I would like to call a kiss of pain. NOW LEAVE ME THE HELL ALONE YOU STALKER!" I stomped back into the water and sat right back down next to a wide eyed Elf-Boy with a gaping mouth. I looked at him with a blank face and then glared back at the scurrying figure of stupid little Kehoe. Oh come on Link, you know he had it coming." He just blinked and response before I started using him as a pillow. "You know, as awesome as this might be, we're probably will turn all prune-ish if we don't get out soon." Link just did his little gasp thing in response. "Yeah, I think we can stay for another ten minutes or so."

"Elenya wake up." I quiet voice called to me. Not like a shy voice though no. It was gentle voice, almost elegant sounding to the extreme. And there's only one voice that sounds like, it's so elegant that I want shoot the owner because it only makes her that much more perfect than she already is.

"Go the hell away Srej." I could only imagine her rolling her eyes at my want for more sleep.

"Elenya, it's already sun up."

"Shut up before I send Llama's after you."

"Link's leaving for the mines in ten minutes. If you don't get up now you're going to miss him." That got me up. He better not be thinking about leaving me all on my lonesome here. I love the kids just as much as the next person, but I'm not going stay here with them and some how get tricked into becoming Kehoe's fiancée. I'd rather get a bomb flower shoved down my throat and have it explode. You know what the sad part of that is? I'm not even joking at all. I'm completely dead serious.

When I got up from the spot on the floor I claimed as my sleeping spot I pushed Srej out of the door to put on my tunic on. It's dry so it's all cool. After getting dressed I ran to the corner of the room and grabbed Zira's quiver full of arrows and bow, but when I was leaving the hotel Srej saw me with my equipment and gave me one of those ' what the hell are you thinking about doing?' looks. Me being in a rush just ignored her and then ran towards Link who was standing right across from the hotel all set and ready to go.

"Hey Link! You ready to go wrestle some Gorons?" Strangely I was in a very good this morning. I don't have the slightest idea though. Link nodded with a slight smile before pushing himself off of the rock wall that he was leaning on.

"Link let's go… Elenya why do you have a quiver full of arrows and a bow? Are you coming with us?" Us… As in she was going to be alone with Link?! Wait why do I even care if she's alone with him? The worst thing she could do to him is kiss hi- you know what, I don't even want to think about it. All I know right now is my good feeling's gone and I completely blame that stupid Mary-Sue. It's all her fault. I blame her for everything including puberty. God I hate her with her unnatural singing skills and her parenting skills. She drives me nuts. I hope the fire slugs burn her or something.

I put a fake smile on my face after holding a strong urge to roll my eyes.

"Why yes Sue, I'm going with you. If you have a problem with it I suggest you learn how to deal with it." Link rolled his eyes at my attitude towards Srej, I guess he doesn't like the way I treat the people I have problems with.

"I never said I had a problem with it did I?" She stated as she quirked her brow.

"No but you were thinking it." I don't like this cat… he reads minds. God I really want to watch Ice Age… I wonder when the next one's coming out. I really do love Sid. He's amazingly stupid, but it's funny. Not like Link's stupidity. That's just stressful. Srej's face just fell at my comment.

"You can read minds?!" I laughed so loud you would have thought the tickle monster was attacking me and going to try to kill me.

"Yes, yes I can." my statement was dripping with sarcasm. That's when I realized Link already started to make his descent of Death Mountain. "Hey Link wait up! Don't leave me alone with a Sue! JERK!"

__________________________________________________________________________________-

"Are we there yet?"

"No,"

"…"

"…"

"How about now?"

"Elenya just shut your mouth." It's been about five hours since we started walking up the mountain. Now I'm really bored with out anything to entertain myself with. God right now would be an awesome time to have my game boy with me, and I bet Link does too, because he's getting very testy with me.

"I spy with my little eye… something that's green." I know it's a little kid's game but it's a game my brothers always play with me after they get hoodwinked into playing. They like to call me the 'I spy Nazi' which I am.

"Link's outfit."

"Nope." And this is why. It get's really intense when I play.

"Your eyes?"

"Aw Link that's so cute, you noticed the color of my eyes! You're such a sweet heart!" I jumped him from behind and kissed his cheek. "But no. Not my eyes." This guy is such a virgin it's hilarious, his face turned bright, bright red and couldn't say anything with out stuttering. He didn't say anything for the rest of the way there, so it was some what of a guessing game between Srej and myself.

"My eyes."

"No, why would I care what color eyes you have?" I'm a bitch I know.

"How would I know?" I glared at her and let her win this battle. But the next one… oh she'll pay.

Strangely the mountain has been quiet today; which really isn't something I was expecting. I thought that there would be Gorons coming at us from left and right. I hate it when I'm wrong, because when I'm wrong I end up getting bored, cold, or just in a really bad mood.

"Srej, you're a real pain in the ass I hope you know that." She just glared at me with her emerald eyes burning with hate. At least the feeling's mutual. It was only a few seconds later she pulled me out of the way of a rolling Goron that was thrown by our favorite Elf-Boy. "Din Link! Could you try not to kill me please?! It would be much appreciated." I pushed Srej away before I started to hike up the mountain again leaving Srej and Elf-Boy behind. In my defense I believe they completely deserve it. I mean Link nearly killed me and I just hate her so it's all good.

Too bad for me I'm only human though, because once I got over one of the million cliffs we have to climb, there was a Goron getting ready to run me over. Fear started crawling up my spine as the humanoid rock rolled closer to me.

"Link…. HURRY!," I yelled with my eyes closed. Right when I was ready for impact, and most likely my premature death, instead of hard rock, I felt a soft cloth rub up against the skin of my face. I hate how I always have and always will have the worst luck, but I guess right now I guess my luck is a little better though, because every time I get in trouble Link is always there to get me out of it. Sadly, my luck isn't too good because when Link was throwing the Goron passed me, he accidentally elbowed me in the chest… Hard.

Do you know how strong that guy is? It's freakish, I'm telling you right now, because when he elbowed me it had enough force behind it to make me fall to the ground and loose all my breath. How much you wanna bet that there's gonna be a huge ass bruise too.

"Elenya, are you alright? You shouldn't have went a head of us."

"Don't worry Elf-Boy, I'm fine." My sternum was throbbing and tears were falling down my face. Damn that hurt. That guy could give one hell of CPR, the person would never die… Or of course he would break the sternum all together and kill the poor person. The look on his face was so soft, it really scared me. I think he's bipolar or something. I stood up after Link got up off from on top of me. Okay he wasn't really on top of me, but still, he was leaning over me.

His eyes somehow looked different from before. The kind of remind me of Colin's. Speaking of Colin, I hope he's okay. I know he can probably go a day with out me watching over him, but I worry about him. I guess all the bad things that happen to every one around here always happen when I'm around. Man can today get any worse? I feel like an emo kid.

Dear Diary, mood epithetic. Stop my breathing and slit my throat… I must be emo, I don't jump around when I go to shows… I must be emo.

Any way… yeah… wow all this hiking is really starting to get boring. I mean in the game there's a Goron attacking you like every five feet. Why can't that happen now? Not like I want Link to be exhausted by the time we reach the mines, but still. I jus want something to happen damn it!

"Link?"

"Yeah Elenya?" He stopped walking and turned his head so he could look over his shoulder.

"Are we there yet?" He just sighed while Srej glared and I groaned knowing the answer. This really is the worst hike I've ever been on.

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"DUDE! That is one big rock! It's glowing too…I wanna touch it."

"No!. Elenya it's hot you'll burn yourself." You know that creator area, where there's about fifty Gorons already to attack you then you get them to curl up on a ball and use them as a slingshot to get Link up there? Yeah there's only one. I believe that there's this thing that came to Death Mountain and ate all the Gorons. I really wanted to see one too. So since I really don't have to worry too much about them giving me the hug of death, I was trying to entertain myself with the big glowing rock in the center of the creator. Well that and I'm trying to get Link and Srej pissed off. It really doesn't take much to piss off Srej, I just have to breathe and she gets angry at me. Well no, she hates me because I'm closer to Link than she is. Well what can I say? My little Elf-Boy is a cutie!

"Elenya, you are such a five year old."

"Yeah well at least I'm not a Mary-Sue…" She gave me a death glare as I continued to walk next to Link.

"What's a Mary-Sue? You love using that phrase but I don't have a clue what you mean."

"Some one who does everything perfectly and is annoyingly good at anything they do the first time they try something new,"

"Oh,"

"So you're just jealous of me then?" what?! I am not jealous of that whore!

"I am not jealous of you, you whore!" Link gasped at my foul language and accusation. Yeah, maybe it was a little much, but you know I guess I am a little envious of her. I mean she was the one that was picked to help Link, and she can do anything right the first time or at least she can catch on freakishly fast. "Come on Link grow up, we're all adults, we can use adult language."

"That's not adult language! That's just barbaric language, what makes you think that she doesn't commit herself to a loved one?"

"Because she's a Sue, that's what they do!"

"That's an unfair generalization,"

"No it's the truth."

"Link,"

" Do you have any proof?"

"Link…"

"Why the hell are you defending her?!"

"…There's a Goron coming after us."

"Why are you accusing her?!"

"LINK!"

"WHAT?!" We both yelled back at her, still angry at each other and caught up in the moment. She pointed passed us at a large round figure coming our way. Finally a Goron! It's about damn time. You know what I'm not going to talk to anyone for the rest of the trip… Unless I absolutely have to, like when Link is about to die. Yeah, that's it, only when he's about to die.

The Goron started to take a boxing stance and started to be ready to punch the life out of Link. Hopefully they don't hit girls, otherwise I'm screwed. Okay Link, now would be a good time for you to take out your sword. Any minute now… Come on before the Goron comes and kills us.

"Link just take out your damn sword already!"

"I don't want to kill it Elenya,"

"You won't you moron, Gorons are made out of rock." Wow… My silence lasted long… Okay I'll start once there isn't too much danger, but there's always going t be danger, it's Hyrule after all. "Just hit them in the stomach to have them curl up. They'll slingshot us up,"

Since there's three of us and Link has the only sword Srej went up first. Then I went with Link.

"Come on," Link wrapped his arms around my waste and when we were launched up I held in a wicked loud scream. Really, you know you would too. So in order to hold in my high pitched squeal and not freak out, I held on to Link as tight as possible, and dug my face in the crook of his neck.

"Link…" I mumbled as I kept my forehead against his shoulder and took in the sweet sent of hay that he held.

"Yeah?"

"Are we there yet?"

"Almost." I could almost hear his smile.

"Well, it's about time." I pushed away from him and he let go of my waste. I saw Srej roll her eyes at me before she started to walk over to the ledge and where one more Goron was standing with it's fists raised. Me being tired of all this fighting and what not and being the little grump that I am was tired from all the walking, it was near dusk and I was ready to kill someone. I was starving because I haven't eaten anything since this morning and we haven't even gotten to the little den of Gorons yet.

"Hey Mr. Goron, I'm tired, and hungry and I was wondering if you could just let us pass instead of forcing us to fight you."

"No humans only Gorons." It said in a deep voice.

"Don't you think that you could just bend the rules once."

"No humans."

"You know it doesn't matter if you let us pass or not, we're still going to get up there, so come on, be a pal and let us in." He well it, stood strong like the rock that it is with a frown on it's stony face.

"No humans." I sighed not wanting to make Link knock the wind out of this one, I just shook my head.

"Look, we can help what ever it is you need help with, just let us talk to your boss-"

"This Goron will not let a human pass,"

"Fine! Make us resolve to violence, see if I care. Link the honors all yours." I stepped awa9y from it and let Link jab it in the stomach to make it go down. He helped Srej on then knocked it down again a second time, this time he help me on and we repeated what just happened before. "Din I hate it when we have to do that!"

"Why did you try to talk him into letting us pass?"

"Because I was hoping if he just let us pass then he would hand me up to you guys so I wouldn't have to go flying again." Link just smiled before leading us forward.

The sun was completely gone now and we still had to go through the land of the evil geysers that will try to melt off our skin if we even think about walking near it and will randomly stop if we step away from them. I tried ten times to burn what's her face. Failed every time. Figures don't it? But now… Now we are in front of what I might just consider a miracle. We stood in front of a steel door way that had a circumference of about ten feet, and I think we all know what that means.

"If this isn't the entrance to the Goron City place then I might just have to kill someone. And this time I'm serious."


	11. I'M NOT HIS WIFE!

Chapter 7.5 I'm NOT HIS WIFE!

"Thank the sweet lord we're here!" I said as I did a little dance in happiness; which just gave me strange looks from the other two. "come on let's go!" I grabbed Link by the wrist and dragged him through the steel arch way.

"Whoa Elenya hold on a minute!"

"No time! Let's go! Time to go save Hyrule!" Finally Gorons! I walked down a hallway dragging Link behind me and Srej was just glaring at my back as she watched. I know, because I felt the glare send those shivers of pleasure down my spine. Those wonderful shivers of knowing that I pissed her off. That's my newest reason to live.

I stopped dragging him behind me when I saw four Gorons just stop what they were doing and turn to us. "Hiya!" I said with a great goofy smile on my face. The Goron den looked so much larger than in the game, and the Gorons looked five times more intimating in here than out there.

"Humans!"

"Well technically Link's an Elf and Srej is a Mary-Sue. So that's I'm the only human." Link got the strangest look on his face… Wait a minute, I know that expression… I know I know it. His face is bright crimson and his hand was all balled up. Is his eyebrow twitching? Yep… and his eye's are shut closed, tightly. Oh, right he's angry.

"Kill the humans!" I jumped behind Link in fear.

"Hey what I sec! Don't kill us! What ever we do to you!?" I yelled warily in Link's ear.

"Why do you keep calling her a Mary-Sue?"

"Why the hell so you care so much?!" He crouched into position as the Gorons all started to roll forward at high speed. Their high speed rolling kicked up a cloud of dust behind them and suddenly an old dry voice called out from behind the dust cloud.

"Brothers! Are these humans-"

"I'm the only human!"

"Such a threat to us that you have to attack them all at once?"

"Of course not!"

"Elenya, shut up." I shut my mouth at Link's oral attack on me and just hit my head on his shoulder.

"Meanie." I whispered glaring arm just because it was in front of me, well that and I'm still angry at him for defending that Mary Sue. God I hate her.

"Human, what is it you want?" the voice said. The dust clouds finally went down to reveal an old almost wrinkly Goron… How ever that works out. How can a rock be wrinkly?

"We need to go into the mines. There is something important in there that we need to recover." The short, wrinkly, old stood on top of a round plateau in the middle of the room.

"The mines are sacred to us." Link nodded and put his fierce face on as he looked down Mr. Short Goron Dude. "It is also dangerous, monsters have over run it."

"I plan on taking the thing that makes all the monsters appear." They stared each other down until Mr. Short Goron Dude laughed.

"I like your attitude kid! Let's make a deal, if you can beat me at wrestling than I will let you pass into the mines." Keep your shirt on Link, keep it on, keep it on, keep it on. Okay we all know that's not what was going through my mind, I was actually hoping that he would take it off again, that guy is ripped! Sadly for me though, he didn't take it off again, well I guess that just means that I've seen him shirtless and Srej hasn't ha-ha. I can honestly say I wasn't paying too much attention to the fight because I already knew that Link was going to win. And I don't like sports too much either. I find them fun to play but boring to watch.

"Come on Link!" I cheered from one of the rock chairs I sat down on. "You can beat him!" Hey just because I don't like watching sports doesn't mean that I don't like cheering people on. I mean I love making noise, it's what I do best. Some times too well.

"Human? Why do you cheer so loudly?" A buff Goron asked me with a scary glare coming off of his face. Hmm I thought Gorons were supposed to be cute… Like almost cuddly looking.

"Why not?" He just harrumphed and turned his eyes back to the battle in front of us. Ooh, and Link just got pimped slapped again. That's gonna leave a mark. "Elf-Boy come on! Don't let him be your pimp!" Everyone including the fighters just stopped what they were doing to turn and look at me. "What?" Link took advantage of the opportune moment to pick up Mr. Goron dude and throw him out of the ring. My throat was a little sore from all the screaming and yelling I've been doing with in the past twenty-four hours. I'm gonna kill someone if I loose my voice.

"Hmm, well done Kid. You beat me."

"Damn strait he did now can we go to the mines now?" I asked all excited from the game… I was just excited about him winning, not that I like wrestling or anything.

"No," I stood up from my chair and walked over to them almost stomping my feet as I made my way over. I glared at him suddenly fed up with everything.

"What the hell do you mean by No?" I asked almost at the point of yelling at him. "Link beat you fair and square!"

Goron Dude nodded and crossed his arms. "Link can go, but you can't."

"Why the hell not?!" Breathe Mickey, breathe. Don't kill him. Just breathe.

"It is too dangerous for you."

"Why your little-"

"Elenya, just stay here this time, please?" Hell no! I walked over to Link and looked him strait in the eye.

"No! I had to go through hell to get here so I could help you with going through the mines! There's no way in hell your leaving me behind!"

"Elen-"

"I'm coming and that's final." He grabbed me by the shoulders again and held me at arms length again, just like last time.

"I'm not going to let you get hurt." And here comes that soft look in his eye that scares me more than pink flamingos and clowns combined… What? They scare the hell out of me.

"Just let me come Link."

"You are the most disobedient wife I have ever seen. Going against your husbands word like that. We're is your respect? Have you no discipline?" Link and I just froze as both of our eyes grew large, I saw his face turn a dark crimson and felt my face grow really hot, like I have really bad sun burn hot.

"She's not my-" I broke free from him and took Link's sword from it's sheath. That's it. No more miss nice guy.

"I AM NOT HIS WIFE!" I know I can't cut the rock skin of the Goron but I need my anger to be taken care of. I started to beat him down trying in vain to cut him. "YOUR MORE OF AN IDIOT THAN LINK TO THINK THAT! DO I EVEN LOOK LIKE I'M OLD ENOUGH TO GET MARRIED?!" The Goron Leader blocked my attacks with his forearms as I swung at him over and over again. "I'VE JUST ABOUT HAD IT WITH THIS STUPID MOUNTAIN AND YOU STUPID GORONS! I'VE BEEN THROUGH HELL WITH IN THE PAST TWENTY-FOUR HOURS AND I'M NOT ABOUT TO SIT AROUND AND LET SOMEONE ELSE GO AND SAVE THE WORLD WITH OUT ME YOU GOT THAT YOU STUPID OLD GEIZER!!!!" I finally stopped attacking him and I was painting for breath.

"Hey, my swords sharper." Link said looking at the blade. I growled at him and turned around to let my glare attack him.

"You think so?"

"Elenya-"

"HOW ABOUT I TEST IT OUT ON YOU! YOU LITTLE IDIOT!" I chased him around with his sword in my hand not actually planning on cutting him so I dropped the sword and picked up a rock instead. "LINK YOU MORON!" I threw the rock at his head and hit it dead center, he's going to feel that in the morning. Good, teach him a lesson. The little jackass.

"I like her. You made a wise choice in your wife Link."

"I'm not his WIFE!"

"Fiancee then."

"God kill me now!"

_____________________________________________________________________________________hope you guys liked this one, remember review and check the memo for the last chapter and if you guys didn't sign the petition for the Legend of Zelda movie yet please do I left the preview for the movie and a link for the petition


	12. Gorons and Gummybears

Gummy bears and Gorons

"Stupid Link, with his stupid mission to go save stupid Hyrule…" I muttered as I sat in the middle of the hard sumo wrestling ring, glaring at the passage way to the mines. The ass left with out me! He snuck off with Srej while I was sleeping! Oh I'm going to give him hell once he gets back!

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Twelve hours ago….

It has been decided that we would all go into the mines, and the Gorons let us have a nights rest first so we could fight and not die. We were being lead to our rooms by the short little Goron dude, oh by the by, there are actual rooms that are connected to the den place of the Gorons. Weird huh?

"Srej, this will be your chamber. It isn't much but it should suffice." It wasn't really much of a room, but hey what did we expect? Pure Egyptian cotton and silk? The room was just an area that was carved out of the side of the mountain's red stone and had a small bed on the side. And by bed I mean a stone slab about three feet high covered in hey with two pieces of linen.

"Thank you, milord."

"Push over…" I muttered only to get her to glare at me again. What a wonderful feeling of accomplishment, not like I was actually planning on making her angry, it was just a bonus.

"You two follow me." And we followed that short guy about twenty feet down the long winding hallway, I swear this place is just one giant ant colony. When we stopped the first thing I noticed was that this room had a real door, and not just a curtain like Srej's room. "This will be your room." He opened the door and the first thing I noticed was the bed. The slab of stone was twice as large as the one in Srej's in with, and the room all together was larger. There were actual decorations too, like on one wall there was a tapestry and there were torches giving the room a dim light.

It wasn't till after Link and I got pushed into the room and locked in when we realized what they meant for us to do. They really do think we're married don't they… Oh wait… They don't expect us to… GOD GET ME OUT OF HERE!!!

"You wouldn't think that this bed is soft…" Link you poor innocent soul. He was sitting on the edge of the bed closest to the door patting part of the makeshift mattress.

"They still think we're married you know." his face went a little pink as I just leaned up against the wall. "Stupid Old Goron."

"It isn't all that bad you know." I'm starting to think Link either A) wants to be my husband. Or B) I completely naïve to what it means to be married. Of course there's always option C) He's a total moron… I think I'll go with C.

My eyes were taking in the room and that's when I noticed something. In the corner of our room there was another doorway but there wasn't an actual door, it was just like at Srej's room. I walked over to it and moved aside the curtain and saw heaven! There was a hot spring, and towels.

"EEEEEEEEEK!" I started stripping down so I could go take a swim once I was actually in the side room with the hot spring.

"What? What is it?!" Link said sounding alert. That's when he came in… and saw me… In the nude.

"LINK YOU PERVERT! THERE'S THIS THING CALLED KNOCKING!" I picked up a random stone on the ground and threw them at him, I'm happy to say at least one of them hit him in the forehead.

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After I had a good soak in the tub I let Link go in, and I tried to get comfy on the floor, but for some reason I couldn't fall asleep, so I thought 'hey why don't I try the bed' I was out with in ten minutes

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"Link…"

"…"

"Liiink…"

"Elenya…" I was trying to get Link to wake up and let go of me because he had this great idea of sharing the bed with me, even though it's a pretty large bed I somehow woke up with our legs tangled, me cuddling into his chest and his arm draping over my waist. And now he's talking about me in his sleep. Oh joy. And you know it's always fun to learn what they're dreaming about.

"Link do you like someone?"

"Yes…" Okay this is actually a little sketchy, and to be honest, I'd rather not know who it is he likes. For some strange reason I have a feeling that it's Srej. Don't ask me why, I just do.

"Hey Link wake up." I poked his face and he woke up. "Uh, yo, I was wondering if you could help me get untangled?" His eyes snapped open and once he saw my face nearly three inches away from his he freaked. No not like that poor little kid who freaked out because he was grounded from W.O.W. More like he jumped back three feet and landed on the ground very hard. "Thanks, much appreciated." And I went back to sleep…

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God hates me though so I woke up again three hours later with me practically on top of Link, with his arms wrapped around me yet again. Wow I really need to get this guy a teddy bear or something, or maybe I should just stop sleeping near him. Any way he must have gotten back into bed at some point because the sheets were still covering us, despite the awkward position. I guess the heat of the room was too much for him to take so he took of his tunic so he was only wearing his leggings. I, on the other hand, was wearing pretty much the complete opposite, I was only wearing my overly long shirt that came down to about mid thigh. Stupid me forgot about the possibility about the shirt rising up.

I bet if someone came in right now it would look like we actually had sex… I wouldn't doubt it. I just sighed and went back to sleep giving up on trying to stop moving into awkward positions in our sleep. Besides, Link needs as much sleep as he can possibly get.

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When I woke up later that morning I found the bed empty and looked around the bed to make sure he didn't just fall out. Then I checked the hot tub and he wasn't there either. So I checked the Gorons den only to be told by the Chief guy that Srej and him already left with out me. So now we are in the present; which is when I am angry and bored. And frankly I'm really hungry for a gummy bear.

"Oh I'm a gummy bear, yes I'm a gummy bear, oh I'm a loving funny tubby little gummy bear. Oh I'm a Jelly bear cuz I'm a gummy bear oh I'm a moving grooving jamming little gummy bear oh yeah" yes I was singing the gummy bear song, what? I'm bored. You know what maybe I'll scheme… Or maybe I won't scheme and I'll just wing it when he gets back.

Back to staring at the door way…

"You know staring at the door won't make them come back any faster." I didn't realize anyone other than myself was present at my moment of anger towards Link.

"Do you know he does this to me every god damn time he has to go save someone? Just leaves me behind like I wouldn't be helpful. And what's worse is that he takes Srej along! She almost killed him last time!" Mr. Goron Dude just looked at me knowingly. "Oh by the way, thanks for the awkward nights sleep. Why couldn't you just give me a separate room?" A smile broke out onto his face revealing what I believe is a row of white teeth.

"No matter how hard one tries to deny it, I know when someone his husband and wife. It's in their body language." I stood up so I could look down on him.

"I'm. Not. That. Idiot's. Wife." If I was like superman and I could shoot lasers out of my eyes, then this guy would hove two huge wholes going through his head. "I would never marry him! He's way too over protective of me even though he knows I can hold my own and that I saved his life. Actually that's how one of our fights started. And on top of all of this he's a total Jackass."

"The course of true love never did run smooth." I just snorted at the comment. Since when was this guy Shakespeare?

"Yeah that's because there's no such thing as true love smart one. What does that even have to do with what we're talking about?" He just shook his head and left. You know why he did that? Because he knows that I'm right and he is wrong and he's just a sore looser that's why. I know I seem like I'm really touchy on the whole subject of that 'L' word. I can't even bring myself to say it it's that sad. I'm just sick of people trying to make me believe in it. Plus I'm sick of Leah constantly telling me she's in … yeah insert the 'L' word here… My point is I hate talking about it and I see know proof that it exists.

"Never mind young one." Is every male in Hyrule a jackass? Just saying stuff out to the blue like that and not even explaining himself after word. Man he really bothers me, well not really but that's okay, I'm just peeved with him I guess. So the dude just walked off leaving me alone to die of boredom in this lonely cold dark cave… So what if it's not really cold or dark, just shut up, it's called a hyperbolae. Any who, back to the point, I'm bored again and there's really nothing for me to do except wait in here. Last time it took Link about a week to finish the temple place, so how long is it going to take him to finish this place off?

"Link, hurry your ass up." I got up and walked back to our room planning on taking a warm bath and relaxing. But once I got in the thoughts in my mind that kept popping up out of no where were anything other than relaxing.

"Stupid Link," I whispered as I pulled my knees up together and rested my chin on them. " Why do you keep taking her with you, you jerk. I bet he likes her. He ever answered my question when I asked him who it was he liked." For some reason when I thought at the possibility my already sour mood just got that much worse. No I'm not jealous so don't even think that. If it were anyone else that he liked I wouldn't care, but it's that damn Sue… I'm sure of it… Aren't I?


	13. Mickey, welcome to Hell on Erath

**Hey guys, I want to thank all of you for the reviews keep them coming! 51 reviews woot woot! On a much sadder note only like two people have signed the petition for the Legend of Zelda Movie the link for the trailer is still on one of the past chapters don't remember which one though, please sign it I'm begging you!**

**Oh and thank all of you who think that this is a comedy, I don't know how it ended up like that but somehow it did so I do believe I will change the genre. Any who please enjoy the knew chapter I don't think that it's as funny as the others but oh well ~~~~~~~Emma**

* * *

**Mickey, Welcome to Hell on Earth**

It's been a day since Link and Srej went into the Mines of hell, yeah I had to give the Goron's mine it's own name, but I mean what else am I supposed to do? It's not like I have a gameboy to play or anything like that, Right now I'd even settle for my homework to tell you the truth. Yeah, I'm that bored. Well anyway back to what I was saying before it's been a day since they left and I'm still not liking the thought of them being alone together, actually the thought of chasing after them crossed my mind at least ten times in the past half hour.

Even though I like the thought of me doing something that stupid/brave( which ever one you plan on choosing) The leader of the Gorons put up extra tight security at the entrance to the mines so I couldn't get through. Jack ass. Evil rock wrinkly Leprechaun, yeah I know I spelt it wrong, you people can deal with it. Anyway let me get back to enjoying my thoughts of Mr. Goron Dude failing at being a little Irish green person.

"Elenya," Speak of the Devil, he's here.

"What do you want?" My tone obviously told him how bored I was.

"Food is ready." I quickly rose from the bed Link and I were sharing and ran through the door to the Gorons Den. Stupid little me forgot what their diet consisted of. So all you sadistic little people who read this, wipe that little smirk off your face, yes I know your smirking now stop. For all you other people that don't know what I'm talking about, it's the little tiny itsy bitsy fact that Gorons eat rocks. ROCKS! You know what's really sad? When you see a life form eat off of a rock plate and having their meal be rocks. What's the point of even having the plates in the first place?

I sat down at the ring where other Gorons were sitting eating their meals and they all just stared at me… Reminds me of cows… Long story, but I'm bored and not really looking forward to eating seven pounds of rocks so I'll tell you any way. My family drinks straight from the cow raw milk and we get it off this little farm up in New Hampshire, so one day I wanted to pet a cow and asked the farmer if I could he said yes so I went down to the barn where they were all eating… Just like now except with Gorons, Anyway they all heard me coming and stopped eating hay at the same time to look at me. Yeah I know it's creepy. It wasn't till I saw the cows breath steam from it's nostrils when I started running away. So now I'm afraid of farm animals, and pink flamingos… and Clowns… I told you before that I was a coward but you didn't believe me did you? I thought so.

"Hi…" I said nervously looking at all the Gorons faces. Each one looked exactly the same to me and that just scared me even more. God this is worse than the time my mom forced me to go to Canada for a French thing. No one spoke English but at least they didn't remind me of cows. One of the Gorons just grunted and hit a spot next to him as if he was telling me to sit down. So me being scared out of my wits did.

They all started talking about Hyrule and how it's gone down hill and how the Princess is horrible at her job, by the way I completely agree with the last comment. She's the biggest tool ever… Okay that's a lie, Zant is the biggest tool ever but that's not the point. Did you ever notice how the sequel is called Legend of Zelda but she's barely even in it? Just because of that I thought Link's name was Zelda for the longest time. It wasn't till I found the internet that I found out that his name was Link. I know it's sad, but that just proves my point… Which I'm not going to tell you because if I did I'd have to kill you…. How dare you guys even accuse me of not having a point sheesh some great readers you are. Wow… Nice rant Mickey.

"Human, how long have you been a wife?" I started to choke on my own spit at the question. You know what? I'll just tell them that I'm married and go with it, I'm tired of repeating myself.

"Too long." Everyone in the room is looking at me now. Grins and curiosity on their faces. Honestly I don't want to know what on their minds.

Oh God, what the hell did I get myself into? Okay just to let you know, I fed all these Gorons a bull shit story about us going through an arranged marriage and apparently we now have two kids. Ugh, the thought of little Links running around scares me more than skunks; which are terrifying by the way. There's a back story for my fear of skunks too but I won't tell you that because right now we're talking about how much trouble I'm going to be in once Link gets back.

My tummy roared in hunger and I patted its firmness…. Wait, since when did I have abs? For the first time since I got here I realized how much weight I lost, it's probably a very unhealthy amount but it's okay I can deal with it. Just as long as I don't faint or what ever. I must be the size of Leah now. How about that? I bet it's also from all the none eating I've been doing in the past two days. I wonder how Srej is holding up, don't get me wrong it's not like I'm worried about her or anything, it's just that if she dies and screws up then Link will be in big doo-doo.

You know what? I'm really not looking forward to going outside. I'm going to have a headache for a week. At least the Mines have some light in them. This must be what it felt like to be in the holocaust. Well in the beginning anyway. Link get your ass back here soon. Wait a minute, I just got a light bulb moment!

"Hey Mr. Chief?"

"Food Glorious food!" My mouth was watering and I don't think my stomach could have growled any louder. How is it that those guys are still alive? I mean they fight through temple things with out any food. How much you wanna bet Midna hid food somewhere. That has to be it.

"It's good to see you again my friend." Ranardo said as he sat down next to me at the table. I had a Merchant Goron bring me back down to the village, well it's more like I ran away after asking for the Chief guy's permission to leave. I high-jacked a ride in the Goron's cart of merchandise. Got me there by dinner time.

"mhm," I said with a mouth full of what tasted like chocolate covered chicken. Not Hershey's chocolate mind you, it's an unsweetened type of chocolate. I had it before at this tiny little Spanish restaurant in Boston, it was yummy. I swallowed and shoveled a spicy type of rice into my mouth. I washed it all down with a large cup of water from what was once a well. Ew, what if that was the well that had the eye of truth. With that thought in mind I stopped drinking the water and put it back down far away from me. Okay not so hungry anymore. You wouldn't be either if you drank dead people water. That's just nasty. I patted my now full tummy with my right hand after putting down my fork and slouched in my chair. "Thank you, that was delicious!" I exclaimed Luda nodded and Kehoe was just staring at me with love sick puppy eyes.

"Oh my Love what ever did that Link do to you?" I glared at him for calling me his love again. God this guy is just as thick as those Gorons.

"Well apparently we got married, then after sleeping in the same bed he ditched me to go save the world with Srej." Ranardo was smirking and Luda was trying to hide a grin by looking down at the floor and having her hair cover her face.

"That user of women!" Is it just me or does he sound like Kuno from Ranma ½? "How dare he treat you in such a manner! Defiling you like that and then just leaving you for another woman!" Seriously next thing you know he'll start calling me Akane and start telling me how he loves me and 'The Pig-tailed girl'. "Do not worry Elenya, I will give what ever child you two conceived my name!"

"Who the hell said anything about conceiving a child?! Do I look pregnant to you! You're such a moron!" I was just about ready to go up stairs to the room I was going to start sharing with Beth again when I turned around and looked at him. "Oh by the way, as far as I know Link and I are still virgins." Kehoe's face turned bright red and then Ranardo actually started to laugh.

"Yes! The Wedding was not consummated! We still have a chance."

"Yeah yeah whatever I'm going to sleep." I was half way up the stairs when I heard Talo ask something that made me remember the kids were even in the room.

"Ranardo, what's a virgin?" Oh shit, how the hell do I explain this one to Link? I just ran up the stairs before they could hear me break out into laughter.

Slamming the door to our shared bedroom closed I used it to support myself as I laughed. After about five minutes of laughing I still had a goofy grin on my face and my newly found abs were hurting. Did you know there's a fire place in our room? If you didn't well now you know and there was my mess just how I left it. Clothes piled into a heap next to sheets that were strewn all over the place and a pillow covered by one of the sheets. It's strange how cold it gets at night here considering how warm it is during the day. I took a sheet and neatly laid it out in front of the fire place and took the other sheet and laid it out on top. Grabbing Zira's clothes I walked over to the door to make sure it was locked so I could change. Once I was in the rough yet soft layers of fabric I laid down on the makeshift bed hugging my pillow and using it correctly at the same time. Even though I was full and should be sleepy I was wide awake staring at red flames licking the firewood in the pit.

It probably had something to do with my thoughts running wild, mostly about Link, some bout Srej, and at one point both at the same time. Beth came in and took off her sash as she usually did and climbed into bed with her dolly.

"Elli?" Her voice was really soft as if she didn't want to break what I thought was a calming silence.

"Yeah?" I looked away from the orange flames and looked at the girls freckled face. She looked very innocent and almost scared.

"Did you and Link have a fight?" I felt a smile tug at the corners of my mouth. When don't we fight? She can't be so scared about that.

"No,"

"Then why aren't you with him right now?" That question caught me surprise; which really shouldn't considering I would have asked it too.

"Because he didn't want me there. You should get some sleep." she rolled on to her side and kept looking at me.

"Did you two really get married? It would be wonderful if you did." No it wouldn't be wonderful. I would have to shoot my self with a gun, or maybe a Mini crossbow.

"No honey, sorry." She sighed and went back to her original position of laying on her back, this time though I think she actually tried to sleep. After watching her switch positions ever five minutes she finally announced that she couldn't sleep.

"Elli, will you sing me a lullaby?" I got up off my make shift bed and walked over to hers and sat on the edge of it.

"I don't think I know any."

"Just sing what ever you can remember then." So I did, my song choice surprised myself. I sang Will Fall For you by secondhand serenade. I didn't even know I knew that song. When I finished that song I looked down and saw that she was asleep, but sleep still didn't even come anywhere me. So I went to the one place I feel like I can be at peace, the roof of the tallest building in the village. The lyrics of the song replayed over and over in my head as I just laid there looking up at the stars and saw the outline of my breath. Before I knew it my eyes started to sting and my breathing became staggered. And I blamed it all on the same person that left me alone with the Gorons.

He didn't want me there. It's the cold hard truth, but it's still the truth no matter how you look at it. Stupid Link. The last thing I remembered was crying and singing a song from Escaflowne until I fell asleep.

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"Elenya? What are you doing up here?" Talo?… What's he doing in my room? I woke up to Talo leaning over my face with confusion written all over his face. When I looked passed Talo I saw blue sky and felt my eyes sting and my forehead throb in pain. I hate mornings. I slowly sat up to make sure that I didn't bang heads with him and looked around suddenly remembering everything, even what I told everyone last night. God kill me now. "Kehoe is wondering where you are."

My eyes went wide in fear. I'm NOT looking forward to talking to him.

"Talo listen to me, do NOT tell him I'm here."

"Why?"

"I'm not in the mood to deal with him today." I stood up and wiped off what ever dirt was on my back side.

"Is that why you left Link?"

"No I left Link because I was obviously unneeded." I started to walk down the path but I just remembered something. "Talo?"

"Yeah,"

"Bye," With that I went back down to town. Too bad for me once I got down there I saw an overly concerned blue eyed Elf-Boy and his Mistress of Perfectness. Oi vay, can today get ANY worse?! I tried sneaking back up the hill so I could hide in the look out area but since I said those four cursed words it just made Link suddenly look in my direction. At me, not with his normally calm and warm eyes that freak me out no not at all, it was a look of anger. To tell you the truth, I think I preferred the look that freaks me out.

Great even better he's walking over to me, Din help me some how! Run feet run do something! Even though my mind was screaming these thoughts my body wouldn't move a muscle. I'm little red riding hood, and Link is the big bad wolf, and the lumber jack is know where to be seen. I'm dead.


	14. I'll hide you seek

Sorry guys, but sadly I think it's another boring chapter, I think I somehow lost my funny, actually I don't have much to gio off of I'm having a huge case of writers block so sorry for the non-funnyness

Don't forget to review because thats what I now live off of

~Emma

* * *

I'll hide you seek

Hide me hide me hide me hide me hide me. It's the only thought going through my mind. I love Link he's a great guy and not all bad, but damn it, he's more scary than my mother, and according to me and two thirds of my cousins she is one hell of a scary woman, in that sweet motherly kind of way. Realizing there wasn't an escape other than passing the blond haired menace and the Sue of doom I tried to sprint pass them. Too bad for me, it had the same affect as 99.9% of my plans, it only got me hurt in the end.

"Don't even think about it," Link hissed as he forcefully grabbed my arm as I yelled oww very loudly gaining just about everyone's attention.

"That hurt you jerk!" He just continued giving me the stare of death, his gaze really made me want to run away and go hug a teddy bear while hiding in the corner. "Why the hell are you glaring at me! I didn't do anything wrong it's not like I promised you I'd stay there, you said I could go with you to the mines-"

"And that's what happened you went to the mines I never said anything about letting you kill yourself by trying to help me."

"Din, not this again! How many times do I have to tell you?! I can take care of myself, I can hold my own and I don't need you to take care of me all the time!" Our faces were nearly two inches away from each other, and no I didn't have an overly powerful urge to kiss him, that would just be wrong. There is no way in hell you could get me to kiss Link right now. I'm too pissed. Then again there is such a thing as anger sex so that isn't a very good point…

Anyway back to my original train of thought the only thought that was crossing my mind was how this must have looked to everyone else. We were growling at each other (wow that sounds wrong) and A glare was brought to my face, but our growling wasn't very loud so almost no one except us could hear it and some how Link's arm made it's way around my back tightly holding me in place so I couldn't run away from him.

"Elli, last night you told me that you and Link weren't really married…" Great just effing great! Why don't you just throw Kehoe into the mix huh?! Make this even wor-

"LINK YOU BASTARD!" Jesus Christ! It was sarcasm! Kehoe came out of know where with a sword that I've never seen before in my life and pointed it at Elf-Boy. "How dare you marry my love! How dare you defile her with your hands!" He came running at us and I pushed Link out of the way sending both of us to the ground.

"Kehoe you jealous idiot! I'm not in the damn mood for you will you just leave?!"

"WILL ALL OF YOU STOP ACTING LIKE CHILDREN?!?!" We all just stopped what we were doing aka fighting and looked at Srej. Her left eyebrow was twitching and her hands were balled up into fists shaking down by her sides. Me thinks she's jealous because she's not the center of attention. "You're all giving me a freakish headache so if you could stop your yelling I might just not kill you."

"Wow someone's PMSing." I whispered after blinking at her, I was surprised she even came into the fight at all. Usually she just lets us battle it out then bitches at me for being stupid or jealous or something like that.

"Elenya, you, me sanctuary now." Link growled as he stood up and started to walk towards the sanctuary. I gulped nervously watching him stalk off down the road. Why me? Why do I have to be the one with the over protective friend? We can't he be freakishly over protective of Srej, huh? Once I noticed that everyone was watching me expecting me to get up and follow I started to giggle in fear of my life. Hey, some people cry when they're about to die, other's see their life flash before their eyes, I just happen to giggle. Just like when I go to a graveyard.

Very slowly, and I mean very slowly, I got up and walked down the road, actually it was more like a death march. When I opened the door I saw Link standing there in front of the Moth statue thing in the middle of the floor with his eyes closed, not moving a single muscle. In all honesty I thought he was dead for a good five ten seconds.

"What the hell were you thinking?" His voice was low and soft again, thank the sweet lord. I don't know if I would still be alive if he was yelling at me again, I think I would have had a heart attack and died. "didn't you realize it was dangerous for you to come down the mountain by your self?"

"I didn't come down by myself. Why do you care so much anyway? It's not like I'm your girlfriend or anything, seriously you treat me like I'm your wife that's nine months pregnant. I'm not going to keel over jus because I got hit by hot water." What happened next scared the living shit out of me. One moment Link was just looking at me with that strange look in his eye, next thing I know he's got his arms wrapped around my shoulders and won't let go!

"I care for you Elenya, I don't-" I cut him off and pushed him arms length away.

"Yeah, yeah, I know, you don't want me to get hurt." I brought my eyes up to his face and smiled to show that I wasn't all that angry with him. " You know unless you change between now and the time you really do get married your not going to be that great of a father." I dropped my hands from his shoulders and broke out into a full grown grin. "You worry way too much!" I started chuckling at the thought of Link being a father. "Learn to lighten up a bit won't 'cha?"

I turned around and put my hand on the door knob to open up the door (obviously why else would I hold a door knob? To cook a hamburger?) and walk outside, but Link for some reason stopped me.

"How about we make a deal?" I quirked my eyebrow at the suggestion.

"What kinda deal are you thinking about?" He grinned that cocky grin he shares with Andrew and still had that freaky soft look in his eyes. God this boy is going to be the death of me.

"I'll try not to worry so much if you try not to be so reckless."

"Hey I am not reckless! I can ride a horse with out falling off!"

"Yeah but you can't walk up stairs with out falling up them first." Damn him for being right…

"Fine, oh by the way I told every one the story about how the Gorons thought that we were married, I told them that we weren't really but Kehoe is just a-"

"A jealous idiot? Yeah I know." He let go of my hand that was on the door knob and we walked out side only to see all the kids suspiciously standing near the window. I just gave them what I hoped was a I-know-what-you-guys-were-doing look and walked pass them. Haven't they ever heard of privacy?

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It's lunch time now and we were all sitting down in the lobby of the hotel eating.

"So are you guys down with the Goron's yet?" I asked them before taking a bite out of that cuckoo leg that has been beckoning me for the passed five minutes.

"Yeah," Well that didn't take long at all. Wow, It took him about a week for him to finish the first temple I'm surprised that it only took him a day to finish this one. Then again he did have a Sue with him. So up next was the water Temple

"Hey Sue, can you swim?" her face went pale. Like snow white pale. Speaking of snow white did you realize Disney makes all women look bad? I mean come on seriously how scary can a tree be? The only woman from Disney that isn't that bad is Pocahontas. Anyway, her pale face meant that she just realized that we have the water place to go through next, and by the looks of it she can't swim. "I'll take that as a no… Want me to teach you?" at this point most of you are probably thinking 'what the hell? Why would you willingly help her?' but I'll give you a hint have you ever read 100 ways to kill Ilia?

"Thank you, but I really don't think that's necessary,"

"aw come on! I'll teach you I've been swimming since before I can speak, it'll be fun!" Link stopped eating and looked at me with surprise. Why is he looking at me like that?

"You mean you remember something from your past?" Oh shit. Now it was my turn to turn pale.

"Uhh. Y-Yeah, not much though," I said looking down at my plate.

"That's great Elenya! You're finally getting your memory back."

"Yeah just peachy," I mumbled into my clay cup of water that I got from the Spirit spring this time. I made sure that I wouldn't bring my lips anywhere near that dead body water.

"Elli what will happen when you get all your memories back?" Beth asked looking at me with her hooded eyes. I put my cup of water down. And looked up at the ceiling of the lobby, striking my normal thinking pose; which includes me rubbing an invisible beard.

"I don't know. I'll go back home I guess." Link's face didn't look too bright after I made that comment. I guess he really doesn't want me to leave, and yet he constantly leaves me behind, what gives?

"Why Don't you come back to the village with us?" Link said with a some what hurt look in his eyes. In all honesty I think he looked like a wounded puppy. Great now I'm going to cry because of the thought of a wounded puppy could it get any worse?

"Well, think about it. I probably have a family I have to get back to, friends and everything." a heavy silence filled the room as we all continued eating. Me being the idiot I am had to do something to lighten the mood, even if it meant seriously having to pay for it later. You know what I did? Well, I'll tell you.

Between Link and I was a fruit salad, well at least I think it was a fruit salad, it had grape like stuff in it and I kept eating them for the past twenty-four hours, and I took a bunch of those grape like fruits popping one into my mouth at a time. But every once in a while I would throw one. The first one hit Link on the nose. He looked up at me from his dinner and I just looked around the room with feigned innocents smirking. Once he went back to eating again I took another grape and threw it at him only this time it hit his forehead this time he just stared at the grape that was now on his lap which caused me to giggle. Stupid little me started to giggle which made the rest of the people at the table stare at me and that just made me laugh even harder. Once I calmed down and we all started eating again I took I chunk of chicken and threw it at Kehoe. When he looked at me I just pointed to Srej mouthing 'IT WAS HER' to him. And that my friends is how it all started. Now I'm hiding for my life under the table as all the children threw food at each other. Nothing like a good food fight to lighten the mood.

I heard Srej scream and a very heavy thud come from next to the table, me being me looked to find out what happened. What I saw will never leave my mind as long as I live. Srej was straddling Kehoe and pinning his hands to the floor. I swear it looked like they were about to kiss or something. Well after Ranardo yelled at us to stop our 'childish nonsense' I said I'd clean it up, and some how the cleaning party ended up consisting of Link, Srej, Kehoe and myself. I think I guilted Link into it some how.

That my dear friends is how we got into this current position. What position? Why the blame game of course.

"I can't bloody believe you threw rice at me!" Srej cried while mopping up sauce from the wooden floor with a beige rag.

"Well you shouldn't have thrown that chicken at me," Kehoe responded smartly as he swept the lobby area.

"I didn't throw anything at you!" I started to giggle. Those two like each other so much they think they hate each other. It's like Inuyasha and Kagome, hilarious and dangerous.

"Question!" I yelled as I raised my hand and stopped scrubbing the floor with the rag in my hands. "Since when were you British?" Everyone just stopped what they were doing and once again were staring at me as if I had a pokemon sitting on my head (I wish).

"What do you mean?"

"Well she said bloody as a swear I thought only certain people who talk funny did that," (Note that I love the British even though Andrew thinks they are idiotic. He hates them just because I love him. He's such an ass sometimes.)

"What's a British person?" Link asked me still holding on to his mop.

"Some one that talks really funny. In all honesty I can't understand them when they talk. You know what ignore me."

"With pleasure." Miss I-love- a- man-whore said as she continued to scrub a stain on the floor. And so we spent the rest of the day just cleaning up the mess; Midna was probably pissed off that I put her behind in schedule. Well not really I mean they should probably get some rest before they leave for Twilight. So another day with the crew before those two leave me alone with my stalker, I guess I'll be able to survive. Maybe.... I highly doubt it.


	15. Yes Mom

Yes Mom

It quickly became night and I was standing out in the middle of Hyrule field just enjoying the scene. Hey what can I say? I'm a sucker for nature. Though I must admit I am missing the internet a shit load. I mean I wonder how many emails I have right now. Probably zero, because you know no one ever updates on Fanfiction and I have only like one friend, so yeah… I never realized how much I need a life. I gotta go on eBay sometime to go buy one.

"Elenya, it's dangerous out here."

"Really now? There's monsters on the loose that kidnapped me and I had absolutely no idea that it's dangerous to be out here. Thanks for the news flash Link." I voice drooling with sarcasm and I rolled my eyes before laying down on the green, green grass to look up the sky that was glittering with stars. It was very pretty. Remind me to buy a brain along with a life. To tell you the truth it reminded me of all the times my family went out camping. Except when we went camping I had internet… Fml…

"How'd you even get over here?"

"The same as you damn ass. I hopped the fence of complete doom." I extended my arms to their full length and then folded them and intertwined my fingers to create support for my head. You know I really don't know why I'm telling you every little movement I make. Next thing you know I'm going to tell you how I breathe and how many times a day I do.

"You really-"

"Need some Elli time so if you could give me a little tiny bit of time to myself that would be awesome." I shooed him off with a wave of my hand, but sadly he can't orders because all he did was walk over next to me and laid down.

"They're beautiful aren't they?" Jack ass. I felt a small smile form on my face because of his cliché actions and cheesy line.

"Yeah…Want to know what I remember?" I asked him. I know I'm pushing my luck but I really want to tell him something truthful.

"Sure." I turned my head to look at him and laughed still holding that stupid grin on my face. "You know if you don't want to hear it then you just have to say no." He looked at me but I couldn't tell how, and by how I mean what expression was on his face, because a cloud one single cloud was covering the moon and not letting it's light shine down on us.

"No, I really want to hear it… I'm happy for you getting your memory back really." I turned my head back up to the sky and just stared.

"I remember doing exactly this. Just laying in green grass and staring up at the sky with someone next to me. We were talking and he was telling me the names of stars and constellations." Good old Tommy boy. Tommy is my youngest brother, he's older than me by three years just like his twin Doug, but he's the youngest boy by one minute and thirty seconds. He's a real geek, and he knows just about everything when it comes to stars and planets and what-not like that. "But I also remember crying and looking up at the sky by myself. I didn't really think I could ever feel that depressed in my life. Too bad the emo scale was broken when I came here."

"Emo?"

"Never mind. Link…"

"Yeah?"

"If and when I leave… Don't forget me okay?" he propped himself up onto his elbow and looked at me with that strange look on his face and he was getting freakishly close.

"I don't think I ever could." I laughed breaking the 'romantic' air that was starting to surround us and I did it for two reasons. Reason one: I found him trying to be romantic funny; and reason two: I was scared. I can't get too close to him because I knew I was going to leave. That's only to be expected. Hell I wasn't even supposed to be here in the first place.

"Link you are one of the most cliché and overly cheesy guys I ever had the pleasure of meeting." He just went quiet and looked up at the moon as his face turned red and started to smile. "Usually I would kill you for trying to romance me, but given how I like you just the way you are I wouldn't change it for the world." I just saw his face go a shade darker, and then me being the idiot I am just had to make matters worse and kiss him on the cheek. Yeah stupid right? "Wellllllllllll….. This was great fun and all but it's getting late and I need to go to sleep so nighty night." I just left him there blushing like mad and had some how achieved great serenity in my mind.

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The next day I woke up early in the morning for some very odd reason, and no matter how hard I tried to go back to sleep I just couldn't. It's like God is slowly trying to kill me off by cutting off my sleep. Anyway since I obviously couldn't sleep I decided to go up to the hot springs and relax so maybe after words I can catch a few more Z's, but you know I highly doubt it considering how I've never really been able to wake up in the morning really early and then go back to sleep. I can be woken up at like two in the morning and then go back to sleep, but that's the latest I go.

So with a nice fluffy white towel in my hand that reminded me of Sesshomaru's tail thingy (God I love him) I walked up there lazily rubbing my eyes and yawning. That's when I heard a moan. Not like a Oh-my-god-I-have-a-headache moan or like a I'm- going-to-kill-the-next-person-I-see-moan, no it was more along the lines of I'm-a-stupid-Mary-sue-and-I'm-going-to-get-knocked-up-and-cry about-it-later-to-people-who-don't-give-a-damn moan. Try saying that five times fast. And that my friends is the last time I'm EVER going to even go near those hot springs. I don't care if I even have to go all the to fricken Death Mountain's Creator if I have to. What I heard next really made my day though I must admit.

"Kehoe!" I had to cover my mouth so I wouldn't burst out laughing. I ran away far away… Well first I ran into my room and got dressed and then I ran away laughing. Wasn't it awkward as hell? Why yes it was. But that's the reason why I laughing about it now. My only problem is there is no way in hell I'm going to go back to sleep.

"Elenya? What are you doing here?" Ah good old Link. "And this early in the morning?! Are you feeling okay." His bare hand felt my forehead as if checking for temperature. You know how I said I ran far away, well really I only ran down to the Spirit's spring well anyway that's not the point.

I lightly smacked his hand away from myself telling him I'm fine. I don't think he believed me though because 1) I was smiling when I said it and 2) He still looked very concerned. Thankfully though he kept his side of the deal and just backed up so I can breathe my own air.

"I woke up and couldn't go back to sleep."

"Why?"

"Not a clue. I have a feeling that Srej and Kehoe like each other you know." His face looked twisted in humor which just made me laugh harder than I was in the first place.

"And what made you come to this conclusion?"

"Jeez Link what's with the big vocabulary? Anyway I walked in on them… You know what let's just leave it at I walked in on them." Poor Link with his innocent mind didn't really understand.

"What ever can you tell me where to find her? She's not in her room." I giggled and lightly slapped his right cheek ( and for all you weird thinking people don't mean his ass that would just be weird)

"I think she's behind one of the boulders in the hot spring." And so he left, only to be running back with in ten fifteen minutes. Jeez how long can those two go on for in such a public place?

"I take it you walked in on them too." He just nodded face bright red and decided to soak himself in the spring.

"A-any way," Link stuttered after he cleared his throat and he chose to sit down on the dry sand right outside the spring and I sat next to him soaking my feet in the water. "Why couldn't you sleep?"

I yawned and laid my head on his shoulder suddenly feeling sleepy again. I hate how calm this guy makes me, I swear one of this days I'll be so relaxed my heart will just stop beating all together.

"Not a," I yawned again "Clue," with Link leaning up against the rock wall and me leaning on Link I fell asleep again. This time when I woke up I was soaking wet, Link was gone and I still refused to go up to the hot springs. Trust me, you wouldn't either.

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"Hey Colin, what's up?" I just realized that it's been a long while since I spoke privately with him. I guess the only reason why I've been getting close to Beth at all is that she shares a room with me. Well I have to start somewhere don't I? I mean I can't just randomly become friends with all of them, as awesome as that would be. I love kids, I just hate it when they adore me. It's a little creepy to tell you the truth. Makes me feel like I'm pedophile or something.

"Nothing really." He was being his usual quiet self but for some strange reason it seemed as if he was five times more depressing. Well it just seemed that way to me, so I decided to pull a Gibbs and just stare at him until he cracks. Start the staring… Now.

"…."

"…."

"…" Okay this isn't working.

"Well I'm worried about Ilia," Oh yeah! When in doubt be like Gibbs. "I mean, I wonder if she's alright."

"Me too. I promise Link will find her though… I'm not sure in what kind of condition she'll be, but I promise you we'll see her again." He turned his big blue eyes at me and smiled a smile of thanks, and even though he had a sincere look of thanks on his face, I felt a twinge of regret because I knew the thought of Ilia's welfare didn't even cross my mind once since I've been here. Maybe it's because I knew that she's safe at Telma's bar. Or maybe it's just that I'm that selfish and don't care about other people. Who knows. Now that I think about it, I never worry about Link when out with Srej… I wonder if she'll end up pregnant. Probably not because she's a Mary-Sue and they never end up getting knocked up until after she's married. Or she can always just pull a Charlie and use her kids so she can get a new lover. Sorry bad Two and a half men reference.

"I think you should stay with Link." Say what?

"What are you talking about?" Seriously could this kid get anymore random. Well it's not like he acted like Leah and randomly yelled purple kangaroos, but still.

"When you get your memory back, IF you get it back you should stay with Link at the village. I think you two are good for each other. You make him calm. " Okay when did life turn all freakish and all corny and cheesy like a taco.

"Thanks? I guess…" My face was all contorted with confusion, I mean what am I going to say to that? Sure I'll stay with Link for the rest of my life and pop out little mini Links? I don't think so, but I have to admit, the idea doesn't seem that bad to me even though it should. What the hell am I saying! You guys never read that last sentence, if I could would scratch it out but I'm afraid that the ink will smudge the page that I'm writing this on if I do so please, please just ignore that comment. Link = Icky. Once this is all over and I help him out I'm just going to go home and pretend that this never really happened and that it was just an effed up dream. "Well I'm going to go… Do…something…over there."

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"Girl give back my bombs!"

"But Barns! I just want to blow up this wall! Nothing bad will happen! I promise." I said while running away from the ginger curly haired man who was about to murder me with his wielding torch. What can I say, I got bored and he left out some bombs. If there was anyone to blame I blame him for leaving them out in the open where a 16 year old girl who has a mind of a three year old can get to them. See all his fault.

Taking out a bomb about the size of my palm or a super sized bouncy ball I lit the end of the wick with a match I got from the storage area inside the lookout tower and threw it at the wall. Barns just ran past me while I was running away from the highly explosive thing and got his eyebrows burnt off. Like I said before completely not my fault. But the good side to it is that the rock blocking the way to my new swimming area was out of my way. So once Srej gets back the hell will begin MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Kay I'm done with the evil laughter now.

"Elenya, didn't you just finish saying nothing bad will happen?" Ranardo said entertainment clearly written all over his face.

"Hey that's all his fault for running towards a lit bomb. You would think some one who makes bombs would be able tell know not to do that." He just chuckled and walked away at the twitching man. I guess I'll help him up… Then again it would be better if I ran away and hid from him so he couldn't kill me….

"G-girl! Give b-back my -" Barnes stuttered obviously a little loose in the head. I just tossed them to him saying here before walking off. "Hey I'm not done with you yet get back here." I just rolled my eyes before saying,

"Yes Mom." But by the time I got back to him he fainted. Oh well, looks like I'm off the hook.


	16. Back to Reality

Back To Reality

"God Mickey you look like hell!"

"Thanks Leah, you look awesome too." I hissed in pain as I spoke. My face was completely covered in cuts and scrapes from when my face hit the lovely nice hard pavement right outside of my bus, remember? Well even if you don't remember reread one of the chapters it's there I promise. Anyway I'm currently sitting down at my math desk because you know I wasn't wanted there back in Hyrule so they kicked me out of Hyrule… Stupid high Spirit things that really wanted a Mary-Sue there instead of me. Jack asses…

"Sorry,"

"You should be." I said sarcastically and then winced at the pain on the left side of my face.

"What happened anyway?" She said before she started to pull out her Buffy notebook.

"I slipped down the bus stares while getting off the bus this morning." I took out the green notebook out of my bag and started to draw the sunset in Kakoriko on the next blank page. I wonder if they even know that I'm not there right now. You know what Mickey, don't even think about it.

"MICKEY! Oh Honey, what happened?" Stupid math teacher! Leave me alone.

"Long story," I mumbled as I wrote drew some more figures on the white lined paper notebook before me.

"Well, I hope you feel better."

"I will once you leave me alone." I mumble again rolling my eyes and going back to my prior commitment. What can I say, I'm one dedicated woman that doesn't really like any distractions. What in the world is that shiny thing in the corner? I'm not sure what it is, but I want it. "Leah! What's that shiny thing over in the corner of the room?"

"The bald kids head?"

"No! Not that corner! The corner that the blond kid is sitting in… Wait a minute, since when was Brendan in our math class?" I looked at him with confusion all over my face, I mean you would be pretty damn confused too if you just noticed someone you already knew in your class. Especially the class that you don't care about and find as many distractions as possible.

"Since the beginning of the year." Leah said slowly as if she was mocking my genius. Hah funny Mickey, real funny. Me being a genius.

"Really?"

"Uh, yeah." I kept looking at him and eventually he looked back at me. I'm not sure if he thought I was trying to make him go through a guilt trip or something, all I know is that he looked wicked sorry about something. Even though he shouldn't, I mean it's not his fault that I'm a total klutz… now that I think about it, maybe it is his fault. I mean he's been around every time I've had a concussion. I highly doubt he's to blame though. I mean, how can he be the reason I fell this morning? Or how can he be the reason why that girl hit me in the head with a volleyball? See what I mean, completely wrong for me to even suggest that he's the reason for all my concussions.

"What period is next?" I asked still doodling in my notebook. I know I'm not all that great at drawing, but if I can get a little bit of likeliness of the sunset then I'll be happy.

"B period, ick, Spanish. You have-"

"YES! I have Drama. Booya!" I said before doing a little dance at my desk. When the Moron, no not Andrew, came by and handed us the scrap paper for the warm up she assigned us we hid our notebooks and automatically stopped talking and started to glare at her. She really is an idiot, she thinks that a glare is a form of affection, so just randomly she thinks we love her. Ugh, the thought of any form of affection towards her is just wrong. In SO many ways.

Most of C period we just talked and pretended to be paying attention. Well Leah did anyway, I gave up on pretending ages ago. I mean I had her for the past two years, there's only so much of that woman you can take. Really she's horrible. It was in the middle of talking to Leah when I realized that there was a note on my desk. It was very bubbly hand writing so it was obviously written by a girl, so I looked around the room for who ever gave it to me. The was a girl sitting next to me giggling and she mouthed me to open it. That's what I did, and this is what I did just to see what it said.

+Mickey, are you okay?

~Brendan

Your kidding me! Brendan wrote this? No way I refuse to believe it. That's when I looked in his direction and what I saw scared me more than you could possibly know. I was ready to run out of the room. He mouthed to me 'well are you?' That's not what scared me though, no actually I'm really starting to get used to guys caring about me too much. It's amazing what hanging out with Elf-Boy will do to you. He just had that soft look in his eyes that Elf-Boy has, and that's what scared me. Sheesh, why is every guy that I meet suddenly caring about me?!

I picked up my pencil and started to write my reply when Leah stole the paper from right underneath my hands.

"Aw, that's so sweet!" She squealed.

"No it's scary." I said taking it back from her.

+Yeah I'm fine. You have really bubbly hand writing you know.

~Mickey

I told the girl sitting next to me to pass it back to him and she giggled. I think she thinks that we're writing love notes or something. Her tanned hand passed it to another girl and then she passed it to Brendan.

"You are probably the only girl I know of that finds love notes scary."

"Leah, you're an idiot you know that right?"

"How?"

"That wasn't a love note, it's just a note. And it's the fact that he even cares in the first place that scares me." Her green eyes clearly showed me what she was thinking, and we both knew she didn't believe me. Hey, let her believe what ever the hell she wants, even if it means completely ignoring the obvious truth. Just so you know, I didn't even mention that I have gone to Hyrule to anyone yet… Well other than you guys, but you can't really count all that much because you can't throw me into a psycho ward. So yeah she's just going to pass it off as some crazy dream or I'll end up loosing my best friend. I think this will be a crazy secret I'll keep to myself.

The note reappeared onto my desk and a giggle came along with it… Again. God that girl's giggling is really starting to get on my nerves.

+Oh thanks. Nice to know that I have girly hand writing. Are you doing anything after school today?

I held in a laugh and started to write my reply.

+No problem, I have very manly hand writing so it's all good. And no Mr. Stalker I'm not doing anything after school. Why?

I folded the note back up so it was in the shape of a triangle, you know like a paper football, then I threw it at him. I almost broke out into full out laughter when it hit him in the head.

"Mickey, what in the world is so funny about circles?" Miss Moron asked. Panicking I looked up at the board to find something to laugh at, and I found it.

"You spelt triangle wrong. It says Tringle and I just thought it was funny, because it rhymes with Pringle… I'm really hungry now. Can we have snack time now?" Yes we're in High School and we have a snack time. Well it's not that bad considering how we eat at like one in the afternoon everyday.

"No this isn't third period." So she went back to her lesson and I got back to not paying attention. Next thing I know I felt something hit the side of my head. Figures, he probably aimed at my head though.

+Me and my friends are going to High Rock today, you want to come?

"Ooh, is he asking you out on a date?!" Leah squealed, practically breathing down my neck.

"No he's not, you wanna come?" I asked her before writing my response.

"Of course!"

+ I'll come only if I can bring Leah.

I threw it at his head again and waited for a response. Well, this day has been interesting.

+Sure why not. Meet us there at 4.

"Leah looks like your in luck, you can come. Going to help me restrain myself from making fun of all of the wangsters?"

"No, I'll be making fun of them right along with you." I draped my arm around her shoulders.

"That's my girl."


	17. Don't jump off Cliffs

**Hey guys, it's been a while (not really but that's okay) anyway I"m sorry for the sucky job I did for the last chapter I hope this one makes up for it.**

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Don't go jumping off of High Cliffs

"Hey Mickey," We finally made it to High Rock, which is actually what it's called. Salisbury has no imagination. Actually it's a high rock that people jump off of into the Merrimack River, it's probably one of my favorite spots in Salisbury. "Took you forever to get here."

"Oh shut up Brendan." I said laying out my towel on one of the surrounding boulders making sure my towel doesn't touch one of my muck covered legs. You see in order to get there you have to walk through two marshes that only has muck and a trail going through it, no bridge or anything. "We didn't have a ride here so he had to walk."

"I can see that." Jerk. Before I could make a bitchy comment back at him he jumped off of the cliff and did a swan dive into the river. Show off. I waited for him to move out of the way so I could jump off, but once he started to move his friend Tyler jumped off. "Are you gonna jump or what?" Brendan yelled from twenty feet below us.

"You're a real pain in the ass you know that?" I yelled down to him looking over the cliff. I backed up for a running start and almost slipped once I got to the edge. Thankfully I still ended up doing a pencil dive into the brownish water. God that was scary. I swam over to a low rock edge and started to climb up, scratching the bottom of my feet as I did so. Once I got up there I noticed that Leah was still dry and sitting down on her towel. "Aren't you going to jump?"

She shook her head and leaned back making her arms be her support.

"I'm afraid of heights." I gave her my -you-have-got-to-be-kidding-me look.

"You came to a place called High Rock, and you're afraid of heights? How stupid are you?"

"Very."

"Well at least she's honest." I mumbled getting ready to jump again. Brendan cut me off though and Tyler dared him to do a flip. It's not that it's a crazy thing to do, I mean my brother did it before, and if he can do it then Brendan can definitely do one, but it's scary thinking about it when your jumping off of a twenty foot high cliff with sharp rocks at the bottom. When he jumped off it was fine but when he hit the water, all I have to say is ouch. He ended up belly flopping into the river. "Well… That was… Interesting." I said holding in a giggle. When he got back up his face was bright red along with his whole entire torso.

"Mickey do a dive." I'm not stupid. I'm not going to do a dive and kill myself.

"Yeah that's not going to happen." I said before running off to do another jump. This time I actually did slip off of the rock slicing my left foot wide open and going face first into a shallow area of the river. God by the end of this year I'm going to look like I've fought in a war. I would tell you what happened after that, but I really can't because you see that's how I ended up cracking my skull wide open. My head ended up hitting one of the sharp rocks at the bottom, well at least I think I did because once again I was in my makeshift bed in the village.

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"Elenya! You're awake!" Kehoe stated as he saw me walk into the lobby of the hotel.

"Obviously." Every one was sitting down at the table eating dinner, sheesh how long have I been out for?

"You have got to be one of the heaviest sleepers that I have ever met." He said before taking a bite out of some type of veggie. "You've been asleep for about the whole day! We were starting to think something was wrong with you." Is it just me or is it I only go back to my world when I'm asleep? Not day dreaming but actually asleep. I wonder why I came back this time though. I mean, I wasn't meant to be here right? So how come I came back?

"Sue me for being tired. It takes a lot out of a woman when she's chased all around the village." I stated before sitting down in my usual chair. You now what I just realized? Once you sit down somewhere your stuck there till the end. There's no chance of changing it.

"Now I wonder whose fault that is." Kehoe said rolling his eyes at me.

"Barnes for chasing me in the first place." My head gave a sudden jerk towards him as if it were to emphasize my statement.

"He wouldn't have chased you if you never stole his bombs."

"You know I liked you a lot more when you would just agree with me so I could pretend to like you." He just scoffed and went back to his dinner after my comment ended what we were saying, but just so you know, it's the truth, once you go sue you never go back. I know that everything changes when you get to the water level of the legend of Zelda, it's been that way since I can remember, but seriously, this is really starting to annoy me… Not that he didn't annoy me before, it just somehow multiplied by ten once Srej and Link left. Maybe he's cranky because he knows he can't get any from me and he turned into a sex addict. You know it wouldn't be the first time a Sue did this to someone. It's happened before.

Speaking of which, I really do wonder if she's pregnant. Maybe that's why I came back, she can't finish her job so Link has to bring me instead of her. HA YES! Oh…But you know I really shouldn't get my hopes up. Knowing my luck it'll just be another screw up on my end. God I hate my life.

"Well Elenya, you're awfully quiet this evening. Is some thing wrong?" Ranardo asked with a completely emotionless face. Man that guy would be awesome at poker.

"No, just thinking." I took a bite out of food that magically appeared on my plate in front of me and let me tell you, that has got to be the most orgasmic food I have ever tasted.

"I thought you said nothing was wrong?" Kehoe said, jeez you would think that this guy was trying to imitate Niles The Butler from The Nanny.

"Nothing is wrong, but do warn us when you try thinking, I'd like to know when to start packing so I can get away before your head explodes." A smirk appeared on my face, and yes I was very proud of myself. I thought that it was a very snide remark.

"Just because you said that, I won't tell you." He replied. What could I have missed about this place?!

"Please, silence." Ranardo's voice quietly stated, and by stated I mean he ordered us in his assassin like way to shut up. This man is more scary than a clown, pink flamingo, and my mother combined… Okay maybe not THAT scary, but the man is pretty damn intimidating. Other than bicker fest 09 dinner went by pretty smoothly. Kehoe and I kept glaring at each other and I was trying to predict how long it would take for Link to get back.

Don't I sound pathetic? I feel like I'm one of those really needy girlfriends, or a jealous wife, but just to be fair any wife of Link's has every right to be jealous especially when he keeps hanging out with a Mary-Sue like Srej. You know what the worst part of the whole thing is? She couldn't even want him and she'd have him eating out of the palm of her hand. It's all part of the oneness of being a Sue. Okay, moving on before I started rambling on about Link, and you people start thinking that I'm jealous that I don't get to spend more time with him… Because I don't. Not at all.

Okay, anyway back to how long it will take for Link to get back… Not that I actually care or anything, it's just that… well uh… Ilia comes around next time! Yeah… Let's go with that. So right now he should be squishing that huge bug. Ew, you know I'm really thankful I don't have to go into Twilight. If I did I'd have to pretty much EAT BUGS, and not the bunny either. So, killing the bugs will take a day, it takes a whole day for him to go from point A to point B So in total for the whole walking/running thing that adds up to about two days, so he'll be gone for about a week. Damn, that sucks. Once again it's not like I really care that much anyway… No not at all.

I got up from my chair after everyone else left so I could pick up after them. I chose to help Luda with the dishes, that poor little girl is worked like a slave.

"Hiya Luda." I said carrying a stack of clay plates.

"Hello Elenya. I hope you liked dinner." Yeah this little ten year old girl cooks all of our meals, and yet I can't boil water with out something going wrong. What the hell is wrong with me?

"It was amazing, I loved the spices you put in it." You know what's so sad about it all? Not that I can't cook, because a lot of people are like that, it's the fact that I actually KNOW how, but I just can't. I'm not sure how it works out like that, it just does. "I'll wash these, you go out and have fun." I said putting them in what looks like a giant and heavy mortar.

"Thank you." She said with a small smile on her face. With that she ran out of the room in a hurry, then again who wouldn't?

Okay so lets get started on these dishes. Now where's the soap…

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"WHAT THE HELL!" I screamed trying to get the million of suds off of my face. I probably looked like a cloud right now, I was so covered in soap I couldn't even stand it. So me trying to wipe suds off my face only made more get on. "DAMN IT!"

"What's going on in here?" Great, just great send Kehoe in here! This is not my day. "Elenya?"

"Link?! What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be saving the world?" I asked trying to blow suds off of my face.

"W-well I found Ilia." I jumped up ready to smack myself up the back of the head. Right he comes back! How could I forget that he comes back with Ilia?? God I feel stupid.

"Really how is she?" Never in my life have I ever been so thankful towards my acting classes at school. I know how she is. She's perfectly fine, well except for the little fact that she lost her memory. Wow she doesn't remember me, well that's a depressing thought.

"She's… Fine…"

"Link…" Wow this guy can't act.

"But, she lost her memory. When I found her she couldn't even remember her name." Link made his way through the suds to me and wiped off the suds from my face. "You look like you need help." He said with a small grin tugging at the corners of his mouth.

"I know it's sad, I can't eve n wash dishes with out messing it up."

"How much soap did you use?"

"Barely any!" He quirked his eyebrow trying to get the truth out of me. Hey, all I have to say is that this soap is magical, you take the wash cloth and scrub the bar twice and then every thing is automatically covered in it. To prove my point I handed him the bar of soap I've been using. There's barely even a dent in it. He gave it a sniff and then smiled. "What? Does smelling soap make you happy or something?"

He started to laugh at me still holding the bar of soap in his hand. Well apparently it does.

"This isn't the type of soap you use for washing dishes. Smell." I sniffed it, and well what do ya know? It smells like roses. "This is bath soap." I smacked my forehead with my wet and sudsy hand. You have got to be joking. Link went behind me and looked at the shelves for a second. "Here try this."

Man was there a difference. Barely any suds were made and all the greasy stains finely got off. I never felt so much like an idiot before, and now I feel like a soap commercial. Buy Hylian dish soap now, you will see the difference! A moan came from my throat as I shut my eyes, I almost felt like crying. Hyrule really was starting to rot my brain. He just started to laugh at my stupidity again and then started to wash the dishes for me.

"Thanks,"

"No problem, you should really start on cleaning up the room." And that I did, but you know I really hate cleaning in the silence so I decided on talking to him while we got the jobs done.

"Where did you find Ilia?" I found another wash cloth and started scrubbing the floors.

"She was at Telma's Bar in Hyrule Castle Town. Apparently she saved a Zora boy's life." I wonder how she did that, I mean it's not like she could exactly perform CPR on the kid, because he's not even Hylian. Maybe he has some lungs, but don't they need a lot of water to survive or something? That's what I always thought.

"Do you know how she lost her memory?" I tilted my head to the side a little trying to get a good look at his face.

"Probably when she got separated from you guys. She couldn't even remember her name…"

"Doesn't this sound firmiliar," I mumbled continuing to scrubs the floor with a wet rag.

"Maybe you two can learn about your pasts together."

"Doubt it." I said not even bothering to look at him.

"Why?" Giving my poor little aching arms a rest, I just kneeled and put my wet hands on my waist.

"Well how can we go through this together if we didn't have the same causes of loosing our memory? Plus, it's not like we're on the same stages of memory loss either. I'm starting to remember things and she doesn't even know her own name."

"Good point."

"Of course." We both just shut up after that. You would think that our conversation was completely over for the night, but I guess he's just as much as a chatter box as I am.

"Srej has been sick lately." Hmm I wonder why that would be, maybe it has something to do with her sleeping with Kehoe? "I don't think she'll be able to help me for a while." Please she'll be out of the game for nine months.

"What are you going to do?" He paused with drying the dishes that are now clean and looked at me with almost a scared look on his face.

"I don't know. I'm thinking that maybe I should just go by myself." Oh you have GOT to be joking. What am I? Completely useless? The whole entire game is going past me, and I haven't got a good chance or reason to go with him on his adventure until now. This is really starting to bother me.

"Link, you know I'm still offering you my help right? You don't need to do this alone." Yes that's right Mickey play the 'I'm a good friend that will help you with what ever it is you need help with' card. Just keep playing it till he says yes, and when t doesn't work then just push him to saying yes. Now maybe if I go over to him…

I placed my now dry left hand on his shoulder. God I'm getting good at this. I should start playing poker or something. Can't read my can't read my no you can't read my poker face. Okay that's enough, it's sad I didn't even know I knew that song. He placed his gauntlet covered hand on mine and looked up at me with those big blue eyes, I almost feel guilty for doing this to him.

"I know," Yes! I'm almost there. "But I still don't want you to get hurt." Okay screw subtle.

"Link you can't always protect me, if you go alone what do you think will happen? What if something happens to you? You try so hard to keep me safe now let me return the favor." If he wasn't so desperate then he wouldn't have agreed, but he was and that my friends is how I sold my soul to the blue eyed devil. Well let's face it, I sold my soul a when I first agreed to share a room with him.

We finished about half an hour after I talked him in to bringing me with him and right after that we went to sleep. Well at least I tried to go to sleep, tomorrow's going to be hell.

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**Mickey gets to go with Link yay! I decided not to kill off Srej, but I did make her get knocked up so Mickey could go with him. I thought it would be funny to make Link and Kehoe suffer with Srej's Mood swings. **

**Please Review they make me happy and want tp write my story, THANKYOU!! I LOVE YOU GUYS!!**


	18. The Parasite of Woman Link did what!

**Hey guys, I have to say good job with the reviews and I also want to say I have a goal of 100 reviews before I hit chapter 20 so keep them coming, oh and sorry that it's been a while, I've been grounded from my baby so I haven't really had much of a chance to write anything well anyway read and be happy**

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The Parasite of Woman

"You ready?"

"Yeah," I was just finishing up packing up the saddle bags on sheik who by the way was just itching for a long ride. It's barely dawn and I already know I'm going to have a bad day. It's sad really it is. I think I have like a sixth sense or something, like I can tell the future. I doubt it though, because if I did then I'd be partially Mary-Sue then I'd have to shoot myself or make Link kill me, and frankly I don't think he can kill me I think he cares about me too much. " So how long do you think the ride will be?"

"Well from here at least two days. We have to go north through Zora Domain."

"Why? Couldn't we just go south through Southern Hyrule Field and then head north?" A pure look of surprise was written across his face, if the guy didn't trust me as much as he did I think he would've figured out that I didn't really loose my memory and that I actually remember everything. "I looked at the map before we left. It was on the kitchen table." You know what's funny. I have yet to meet Midna. I wonder if Srej knew about her, probably. I mean she helped them with the whole Twilight thing. I hope her kid gives her more hell than god gave Satan.

"I guess that would be quicker, I think it's more dangerous though."

"Dude, your bringing me to a place filled with monsters and your afraid that the ride there is going to be dangerous?" I rolled my eyes at him before swinging myself up onto the saddle.

"I just don't want you to-"

"Don't even think about finishing that sentence." See what I mean? It's going to be a horrible day. This sun-shine isn't exactly helping my mood either. Maybe I should look at the bright side. At least I'm not stuck in school right now taking "notes" while Leah talks about how stupid her boyfriend was last night when she was talking to him. "Got everything. Let's go."

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"You know I completely forgot how pretty dawn is." Well it's been about an hour or so since we headed out and to be frank I was bored. Like really bored.

"I like the sun set a lot more."

"Why?"

"It's a lot warmer than at dawn." Very good point. I still don't like it though. I mean it symbolizes the end and I hate ending more than you could ever possibly know, they always make me cry. The only good ending was the ending of the Twilight movie. Seriously they made vampires glitter like fairies and sizzle like bacon. Over kill much?

"But it turns into night. Dawn is the beginning and you never know what the day is going to throw at you. All you can do at sunset is wonder if you spent the day right. Dawn is just more exciting."

"I thought you liked the night."

"I do. I just like being able to see more." Silence followed us after a little while, and by a little while I mean about an hour. So now the sun is actually up and blinding me, and I'm already prepared to kill something. You would think that monsters would be attacking us already. WHY IS THIS SO BORING! "Sooo anyway… Srej…"

"What about her?"

"What do you think is wrong with her?" Please say something funny like it was poison and not an imbalance of hormones.

"Probably poison or something." Yay giggle time! Yes giggle time. You better know what giggle time is if you don't then you really need to loose some sanity.

+Giggle time : (n) a specific time in the morning of which a person dedicates to giggling because they have yet to be fully awake.

There now you have the definition. Be happy, like me! Okay I really have to lay off the candy Kehoe's been giving me, but it's just so tasty. God I hate the mornings, and really boring rides. Maybe next time I'll bring my gameboy. Yeah, that'll work. I'm rambling sorry.

"Huh, what? Did you say something?"

"Yeah I asked what you think is wrong with her." Okay now that giggle time is over it's now time for me to do what I do best when in Hyrule. Embarrass Link.

"Remember how you walked in on Kehoe and her." Cue the blush! "Well I think that's the cause of her feeling sick. I think he gave her the worst of all parasites. Do you want to know what it's called. Oh I don't think you do considering how it's one of the worst woman illnesses created by the gods." His look is priceless, I'm telling you. His face got all pale and he looked really worried. I feel like I'm telling a scary story.

"What are the symptoms?" Oh this is fun.

"Swelling of the stomach, massive moods swings, sometimes death. Don't worry Link it's not like you could ever get it."

"Why?"

"Because your not a woman that's why."

"What is this horrible sickness called and how do you know so much about it."

"Every woman knows as much about it as I do, and it's called Pregnancy." I shouldn't have told him, really I shouldn't have, because once I did he fell off of Epona's back with a huge thud once he hit the ground. Now we're going to be even more behind schedule than before. Great.

I jumped off Sheik's back and started to lightly slap Link's face till he regained consciousness. You would think that he's the… HE DIDN'T!

"You're not the father are you?!" I yelled in his face. His eyes went wide and he started crawling away from me. For once in my life I was thankful I was considered scary/ intimidating. "LINK! ANSWER ME!" I started to pick up rocks about the size of my palms and throwing them at him.

"Wait Elenya I- I can explain!" My face felt hot and I was shaking with anger, and maybe a little bit of jealousy.

"Link…" I hissed at him dropping the rocks I walked over to Sheik and pulled Kehoe's sword out of it's sheath. "I'M GONNA KILL YOU!!!!!" The little moron got up from crawling on the ground and started to run away. Chasing him with the sword over my head I kept screaming a whole long list of profanities at him. "STAY STILL! I'M GOING TO SLOWLY CASTERATE YOU, YOU JACKASS! WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING?!"

"Elenya it's not like that!" He tripped and I finally caught up to him, still holding the sword in my hands. Standing over him with a really strong desire to kill him I pointed 'my' sword at his, ahem, manly organs I guess you could say.

"Really? Because that's what it freaking sounds like to me!" He gulped as the blade got closer to his… manly region.

"She's just a really good friend of mine and her being pregnant means that she sinned!" Wow it's a sin here two?

"Right, for some strange reason I don't believe you." I was prepared to stab him there but right before contact yelled out wait. "What now?!"

"Your right that was a lame excuse but it's still the truth and people will look down on her now besides that means that I'll have to do the rest on my own." Okay now I wanted to stab him for a whole different reason.

"Link you're such an idiot." I said before running back to Sheik to put my sword away and ditch Link there. I know how to get to the lake I'm not that stupid. Otherwise I wouldn't have just left him there, but I do believe he has to think something over while I go all emo and complain about him not wanting me but wanting Srej, it's like even though she knocked up and not around she's still here to annoy the hell out of me. What happened? Did she turn him into… No I refuse to believe that she put him under her Su spell! But if she did I'll kill her and her Su spawn.

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I gave myself a little vacation once I reached that suicide place, you know where you pay to throw your self off of a cliff; which I think is stupid enough, and then the only way you don't go splat on the ground underneath is to be holding on to one of those demon birds. I don't have a clue what these people were thinking when they opened up the stand. I was laying down in the grass surrounded by purple evil knocked out monkeys and dead bodies of those green pig things that kidnapped me. I was really waiting for Link to catch up with me but apparently that's going to take for ever I might as well chillax while I wait.

It was the strangest moment of my life though. You know that feeling you have when you know that you're being watched? Well it was something like that, except I couldn't see anyone actually watching me, the only things alive around me were the knocked out monsters and the grass. Suddenly I saw this shadow move and then disappear. If that wasn't creepy then I'm not sure what is.

"Elenya! Finally, I caught up with you!" Link said while getting off of Epona's back, as I shook off the weird feeling. " How'd you know to get here?" I just looked at him with a -you-have-to-be-joking look on my face.

"Link despite what you may believe this is a really small country. It wasn't hard at all. All you have to do is follow the road." You know what else I don't get? How an ELF could've missed at least fifteen unmoving bodies laying scattered around a girl that he's traveling with. He didn't even make a comment on it. "Well you're finally here so lets go."

"Here, this is for you." He said giving me a bundle of blue clothes.

"Thanks I guess," I said clearly still angry at him.

"It's a Zora suit, it makes it easy for humans to breathe underwater." Oh yeah I completely forgot about that. I took it out of his hands and started to walk over to the other side of a giant bolder, and guess what? If you guessed that Link followed me behind it then got a black eye, you were right! Brownie points for you! Doesn't the guy get that I was going to change so we could move on? Sheesh seriously.

"Link I suggest you change while I do so we can move on sooner." I took a look at my flippers that made me feel like a penguin, and decided not to put them on till we were underwater. Walking out from behind the giant rock I saw Link buttoning up his trousers and his shirt had yet to be put on. I'm so thankful the girl version didn't have a helmet. I would have killed myself, not because I would look like the total dork I am, but because I can't stand wearing a hat. "Nice abs." I said with a little smirk on my face.

His face turned red as a tomatoes skin (because you know the inside of the tomato is actually pinkish) and he threw his shirt on. Holding both my flippers in my right hand I walked passed him and turned around to look him in the eye.

"You ready for this?" He simply nodded and we both entered the building of my fears, heights, evil birds, and clowns.

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**Hello again hope you liked it, remember review they make me all happy and fuzzy inside, kinda like chocolate for Willy Wonka**


	19. How it went and Frog Legs

**Hey just wanted to say that I'm going back to school tomorrow so I'm not so sure about my updates. Anyway, this chapter isn't as funny as the others but it's more towards the plot of the story so I hope you think I did well**

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How it went and Frog legs

Girls, let me tell you something now so you never make the same mistake I did. When you're from a realm that makes you know what's going to happen next and your closest friend in that realm tells you not to come along for your own safety, don't go. Especially if you know that an insane Twili is coming after Link and Midna. Maybe if I just listened to Link in the first place I wouldn't be in this little predicament that I currently have situated myself.

You're all probably confused, well let me clear something up.

"So, you're the one chosen by the pathetic light spirits."

"Sorry tool, but you're wrong. I'm the screw up that accidentally got thrown here." I felt my self being lifted up and then thrown into the wall my back was facing. "Was that… Really ne-necessary?" I asked trying to push myself off of the hard stone floor of Hyrule Castle. You know I always imagined myself here but I always thought that it would be a little less painful. "You know Zant. You really have some issues."

The Twili walked over to me while I was still gasping trying to find the air that was knocked out of my lungs.

"I really don't see what the spirits saw in you." He taunted in a mocking tone before raising his hand so I was in range of his blast of dark magic that erupted from the palm of his hand.

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26 HOURS EARLIER

"Link can we just go and do the Water Temple now?" I was frustrated from jumping to my ultimate doom and an evil wannabe chicken biting at my hand. You have absolutely no clue what so ever how pissed off I was at that one moment.

"Hold on I just have to do something." What in the world could be so freaking important?! The water temple is RIGHT THERE!

"Can't it wait?!" I whined. I was ready to kill myself from exhaustion, riding horses and knocking pigs and monkeys out takes a lot out of a girl, sue me.

"Stop complaining." He magically took out his fishing rod and started fishing when we COULD and SHOULD be swimming. Then again we should probably set up camp instead because it's really starting to get dark out and I don't think I could stand killing fishy things and still stay awake through out the whole thing. "It's getting late, we should set up camp." Him and his stupid Elf-ness read my mind. Damn him. "Then we'll go at dawn tomorrow." That dearies was probably the smartest thing he's ever said to me in ages. Actually I think it's the smartest thing he's ever said to me since I came here. Yup pretty sure.

"I have no objection with that. I'll go look for firewood." I don't know what I was planning on finding, but the results I had weren't very good. Just about everything was wet except tiny little twigs. I could see my breath as the sun continued to run away from the moon that was about to claim the sky as it's own. Since I couldn't really find any firewood, I looked for the next best thing that I could find. Dry grass, which was everywhere. And when I say everywhere I mean EVERYWHERE. It was everywhere you looked so I didn't have to travel very far.

I sheathed my sword and used it as a sickle to cut all the tall grass that I could carry back in my arms. I felt like a failure when I got back though, because once I arrived Link already got a fire going.

"How the hell did all this happen so quick?" I asked completely puzzled by the warm flames that were licking at the little twigs that I picked up and some branches that looked like they were ripped off of dead trees. It was obvious that he got the branches from trees, but the only thing that puzzled me was where the hell did he find the trees?

"I packed some branches from a the tree in the graveyard back at the village."

"Ah." I dropped the tall grass that I gathered near the fire. At least we could use it as bedding to keep us warm. It's getting pretty cold out at night. I noticed Link putting the fish that he caught on real think twigs then sticking them next to the fire to cook. For the first time in a while I felt homesick for my family. I may have a hectic one but we were fun. We would always go camping on my birthday and have tinfoil dinners almost every night. Go to bed cold and then walk up big eaten. Might sound horrible, but I love it. "So what's the plan of action tomorrow?"

"We wake up, go in, and don't come out till I get a certain artifact." "Sounds good to me." Sitting down next to him I gathered my knees up to my chest and tried to warm up my legs a little. "So what does this artifact look like?" In all honesty I forgot. Hey it's been about a month since I last played so chill.

"None of your business." I jumped up about a foot at the female voice that popped up out of no where.

"Wha?!" I pretty much shrieked as I looked around for the source of the voice. The voice chuckled as a shadow of a midget formed in front of the fire. Oh, it's just Midna.

"What? Scared?" She taunted me, her lips curling into a smart ass grin.

"No not really, just surprised." I said looking at the shadow. Wow the first time I met Midna, it's strange to tell you the truth. I was actually thinking that I'd never actually meet her, but I guess that would be a stupid idea considering how I'm helping them through out the rest of it now.

Her grin fell off her face as she heard my response, apparently she's a bitch, but that's okay because I like bitches. I don't like whores. Getting off topic. She moved into a more relaxed pose, it was as if she was lounging on a recliner or something.

"Well?" She asked after a moment's silence.

"Well what?"

"Don't you want to know what I am?" I shrugged my shoulders as if I didn't really care, because actually I didn't. I mean I already knew just about everything about why she's here and all so it's all good.

"No, not really. Since I lost my memory I've seen a lot of weird things and you're not even up on the top ten." It's completely true too.

10. Beth is crushing on a fish

9. There was a boy stalking me

8. There's that creepy shadow thing that keeps stalking me now.

7. Goron's thought that I was married (ha as if)

6. Purple monkey monsters

5. Green pigs that walk on two legs

4. Twilight portal monsters

3. The creepy way Link looks at me

2. A Mary sue breathing

1. A Mary sue knocked up by a Gary Stu.

I know I need to check up on my sanity because a shadow talking to me on it's own is a little weird but trust me you wouldn't find it so weird after going through what I went through. It actually seems NORMAL. I got the correct reaction from Midna… You know her evil little glare thing she does with the one eye that's showing.

"Why are you here though?" I asked her pretending like I don't know.

"I'm here for that artifact. It's mine."

"Aha." I never thought Midna could be so boring. "Well if you two excuse me, I'm going to sleep. Night."

"No you're not." Link said before poking my side. "Eat first then sleep." I grabbed at the fish on a stick in his hand and ate it. We both finished eating and threw our sticks in the fire before laying down. Since it was a cold night and all I decided on curling up half on top of Link.

"You're warm," I mumbled into his chest before dozing off into oblivion so I couldn't even hear what his response was.

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12 HOURS AFTER GOING TO SLEEP

"You have got to be shitting me." I mumbled looking down into the bottomless pit that was under neath the turning gears that Link just jumped on to.

"Come on Ella, I'll catch you!" My eyes wide as saucers looked at him pleading him to not make me do this.

"There is no way you can get me to jump that!"

"Just trust me!." No, I refuse.

"Wimp." Shut up Midna! With in the past few hours Midna has done nothing but piss me off, so now she's on my hit list. I'm sorry if you like Midna, it's just that she's like that annoying little mosquito in your ear that you can't kill and won't leave you alone. Glaring at her I stood my ground. I know what she was trying to do but I wasn't going to fall for it. She was trying to make me prove her wrong by doing what I thought I couldn't, but you know what? I've embraced the fact that I'm a wimp years ago so her telling me now means absolutely nothing. "You're so worthless, I don't know why you even came along in thee first place. At least Srej wasn't weak like you." Okay that's the last straw! I'm going to kill that midget!

I leaped over the gap between the rock floor and the turning gears, to dive at Midna with a growl passing through my lips.

"I'm gonna kill you! You stupid little-" Forgetting how she's just a shadow I dove right through her and landed practically right on top of Link.

"Hehehe, is that right? Well then," she just grinned at me with her sharp teeth showing in a sinister smile, "I suggest you stop being so weak." Before I could retort she went back into Link's shadow and I let a long string of curses flow through my mouth.

"God I hate her." I mumbled getting off of Link. He shook his head at something and kept on walking top the door that was now right in front of us. Once we passed through the door we entered a hallway that was blue (what do you know?! Sorry I'm just pissed off. This isn't one of my fondest of memories.) and there were bugs, poor innocent little bugs that were about half my size. Before Link could even take out his sword I whipped out mine and started to hack the bug into pieces, before we knew it my sword was covered in bug guts and there was a corps of a spider on the floor. Bats were coming at us fast and I let Link take those out. I'd rather not kill a poor helpless little animal.

Our walk down the hall was quiet except for the sound of rushing water and creatures trying to break through a wall to come and kill us, but you know you kind of get use to the sound real fast here.

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5 HOURS SINCE ENTERING THE TEMPLE

"What the hell is that?!" I asked, I could feel my right eyelid twitch at the sight of this bird thing. Actually, I'm not even sure what it is. I can't remember it from the game and it's beady little eyes were really starting to creep me out.

"Ooccoo, it's good to see you again." Link said kneeling down to the half chicken half human thing.

"Likewise Hero. Would you care if we came along with you again?"

"Helloooooo, still here and no one is answering my question." I called out trying to get my freaking answer.

"I wouldn't mind at all." He said with a small smile gracing his strangely cute face.

"Who is the girl you are now traveling with? And where is Sakura?" Ooccoo asked cocking her head to the side. Who the hell is Sakura?

"She's back at the village at the base of Death Mountain. And this is Elenya." Okay this is bull shit. I'm leaving. "Ella where are you going?"

Great so now he notices.

"Well unlike you, I came to go grab a certain artifact to help Hyrule." I said walking off from Link and his new pet.

"Well wait up for me!" He called out to me. I rolled my eyes up to the ceiling. Ugh, boys.

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7 HOURS SINCE ENTERING THE TEMPLE

Let me tell you it is just weird being able to breathe under water. It's like being able to drink water with your lungs. Any way Link and I are swimming through this little cramped tunnel. We both don't know where it leads but I've got a real bad feeling about it. I saw light popping through a hole that told us the end of the tunnel was near. I almost didn't want to go to it because I was becoming more and more wary of this gut feeling that was just growing worse and worse, sadly my need for air was greater than my fear of what may lie a head.

Link pulled me up from the water tunnel as I gasped for air. The room seemed vaguely familiar and strangely empty; which meant that there was a trap. There's never just an empty room in a Temple, it's like a law or something. All of a sudden something dropped from the ceiling across the room making a thud.

"Is that an eye?" I inquired, that's when we both looked up at the ceiling of the room, and me being how I am screamed. Link being his prepared self jumped up and took out his sword ready to battle. The frog saw us and let go of the ceiling nearly landing on top of him and shaking the floor so badly I fell over. Then, it roared… Yes it ROARED, apparently frogs over here can roar. Scurrying to stand up I tripped three times before actually making it to my feet so I would be able and fight. Now I know I'm not very good with a sword, but I must at least be able to help him somehow.

The frog shook and a million of eggs popped off it's back. Those eggs hatched into vicious tadpoles about the size of my head, that kept trying to eat us. And let me just say those are quick little buggers. I'm thankful they were swarming around me otherwise I probably wouldn't have been able to hit any of them. Remind me to practice more with my sword when we get out of here.

When I was done with the tadpoles I noticed that the frog had disappeared. I know we didn't defeat it all ready because there wasn't a carcass laying around anywhere.

"Ella! Look out!" It wasn't till then I noticed the from shaped shadow that was around me and growing larger. Diving out of the way I hit the wall hard causing me a horrible headache, but I guess that I would rather have a head ache than be road kill. The floor vibrated when the frog hit the floor. When I looked over I saw that it's legs were sprawled out and that it's tongue was just hanging out of it's mouth.

"Link, stab the tongue!" I yelled at him trying to steady myself. God my head hurts. With my sword in hand I was ready to attack the next bunch of man eating tadpoles that I knew were coming. After killing them the frog jumped up yet again apparently I'm the huge threat to this thing because it keeps trying to squish me. Once again I dove out of the way, this time; how ever, I ended up scraping up my elbows and my knees. When the frog knocked it's self out again Link started to stab the tongue repetitively. I was more exhausted then I have ever been in my life and the battle hasn't even ended yet.

Willing myself to get up, I held my sword with a shaking fist while getting into stance for the next and hopefully last cycle. The tadpoles attacked and I killed them… Well most of them anyway. It was last time the frog jumped trying to squish Link this time, and I was ready to kill it. I was getting pretty freaking tired of this thing. He dove out of the way at the very last second and the frog knocked itself out. It's tongue hanging out of it's mouth just sprawled out on the floor like that. It kind of looked like my father after thanksgiving. Using both my hands and just about the rest of my energy I sliced it's tongue till it just stopped moving.

It was at that moment I noticed the floor was covered in frog blood and I realized I was going to smell like rotting fish for a week. Link obviously exuasted, just like yours truly, rested his head on the rock wall surrounding us sitting down in the now red colored water.

"Did you know there's actually a country that fries frog legs and eats them?" I asked trying to find some humor in this situation. He just opened one of his shut eyes and smirked chuckling, it was more of an airy laugh though. It doesn't matter as long as it brightened the moment a little. " I myself have never tried it but I've heard that it's good." He went back to resting and I just let myself collapse on the floor. It was only then I noticed that there was something frog spit covered on the floor. "There's something on the floor covered in frog mucus." I stated almost falling asleep again. And my dearies is how we came to get the clawshot.

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3 HOURS AFTER WE GOT THE CLAWSHOT

"Wait! Before we go in do you have the fairies?" I asked Link, according to the map of the temple we were right outside of the door to the master boss, and I did not want to come all this way just to die. He nodded his head and we cautiously proceeded. All there was in the room was a hole filled with water… a very deep hole. "Link you go first, I'll follow." I said pulling up the scarf to my water suit that allowed me to breathe underwater. He pulled up the mask on his suit and dove in quickly sinking down to the bottom. "Let's do this." I said to myself trying to prepare myself for what's about to come.

The deeper I went the more it hurt, but if Link could deal with it so could I… I think. Finally when I reached Link I looked around looking for the giant monster thing. It wasn't till I stopped swimming and decided to sit in the dead center of the room when I remembered where the monster was. The reminder I got from it was wicked creepy too. It was the all seeing eye. Just watching me. Man was it freaky. I quickly swam away the same way a mermaid would, I've been swimming underwater like that since I can remember. I think it has something to do with me watching the Little Mermaid fifty three times when I was five. Actually I'm not even sure if I was five when it came out… Never mind. Anyway the point is that I swam like a little fishy.

My sudden movement caught Link's eye and he was watching me swim away but couldn't find the reason for it. Well that's till the big Sea monster popped out of the sand like a underwater daisy. Sorry I had to I have Mulan on the brain. Sadly for both of us I was completely useless for this fight. I mean I only had a sword and no clawshot so there really wasn't anything for me to do. I mean I could always jump in and take over if Link wanted me to, but I have a feeling that it wont happen anytime soon. Little did I know that it was going to be a mandatory thing.

After he was done killing the eye one of the tenticles grabbed him and threw him into the wall with enough force to knock him out. He dropped the claw shot right underneath the ruins of one of the pillars that was knocked down since before we got here. I can honestly say that I'm a hell of a lot faster when it comes to swimming than Link is. I'm just a little fishy or as Leah would say "I'm a Fisheh pew pew" I don't get why she says that either. It's just a Leahism I guess.

Darting over to where the clawshot is I aimed it at the now constantly moving Sea Monster. Well in this case Lake Monster… It's Nessie! On a more serious note though. I swam into the middle of the room so I would be circled by it and aimed once again trying to hook onto the eye that is now just on it's back. I released the button and the clawshot shot across the water and an amazing speed and hit dead center. I nearly lost my grip on the handle as it dragged me to the now bleeding eye. The water resistence was pushing me away as I made sure that I didn't let go of my sword or the handle. I have to say the hardest part of the whole ideal is trying to stab it. Link makes stabbing underwater look so easy! After stabbing it three or four times it shut it's eyelid making the claw shot loose it's grip and I rolled off it doing about three flips trying not to get hit by it's tail. There was still a little blood coming from the eye here and there and there was still a cloud of blood floating in the water but the monster kept swimming. Sure it was knocking down pillars left and right causing it's self more damage, but hey it was in my favor so I didn't have to worry too much. Except for when it was heading strait for Link.

When I saw it going for Link I darted as fast as my flippers could take me. I sheathed my sword so I wouldn't have to worry about dropping it and went as fast as possible. When I got to his still passed out body I locked my arms around his waist and moved him to where there were already ruins of pillars so there wasn't a chance of him getting hit again. His head was just bobbing around with the water around him and I left to go finish the job.

I swam back to the middle of the room and circled trying to aim once again. I only needed to hit it once more before it should be dead. The clawshot hit it's target for the last time and dragged me across to the once again bleeding eye of doom. Once again taking out my sword I stabbed it mutlipul times before I let go and watched it hit the wall at full speed. The contact it made was hard enough to break it's skull and make a drain in the room.

By the time all the water was drained out of the room and light filled it instead, Link was moaning and the sea monster was twitching. It was like they both felt the same pain. Well the probably are both suffering from killer headaches. Once Link wakes up the monster almost shatters into black squares that fill the room. It was almost as if we just won the lottery and there was gothic confety all over the place. Then all of a sudden all that confety just shot together to the same point and then there was like a black armor plate or something floating in front of me.

"That's what we're looking for." I heard Midna say as she made it disapear. "You both look tired." I gave her a blank stare as if to say no shit Sherlock I just killed a monster over 200 times the size of myself. "We'll rest here and then I'll open up a portal to leave." I nodded and just lied down on the sandy floor of the room to shut my eyes. You know what the funny part about being exhuasted is? You don't even needto be comfy in order to fall asleep.

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1 HOUR BEFORE PRESENT TIME

Midna opened up a portal for us and we found ourselves in the Spirit's spring. I would never have thought that I would be so sick of the darkness of indoors though. I was dieing for sunlight. A low humming sound could be heard and then the Light spirit popped up from the spring. It was kinda like a dragon snake thing. It's hard to discribe it, but it didn't really matter because I was getting that bad feeling in the pit of my stomach again.

The light spirit was probably saying something important but to tell you the truth I wasn't really paying attention, I was too paranoid at the moment to care. I was just waiting for something bad to happen. And that's when I saw that same black confety stuff rise up out of the ground. The bad feeling was suddenly replaced weith dread because I knew what was about to happen. I can't believe I was so stupid to forget about it too. Link and I turn around there he is… You know Mr. Tool. Yeah that's right Zant.

After he went on his whole little you're pathetic rant and turned midna and Link into their Twilight forms, he turned to me and the rest is history. That's how I got here. And that's why I'm about to die.

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**Please review guys I love them and hopefully this will make 100! Come on guys review review**


	20. The Hylian Torture Device

Sad isn't it? I'm here, paying for someone else screwing up, about to die at the hands of some completely insane person that shouldn't even exist; all the while, Srej, that little Sue and her spawn are living happily ever after peacefully without any worry what so ever. God why me? Why is it always me? Why can't it be someone like, oh I don't know the person who killed the first two bosses in the temple? I mean let's be honest; we all know it wasn't Link who killed all those monsters. It's Srej's fault, and no matter what anyone else says to me I will always believe that it's her fault.

So here I am, on my hands and knees ready to die. Well, this sucks.

"Zant, stop." Say what? Why do I hear a normal sane sexy voice? "She isn't to be hurt by you." Why don't I like the sound of that? I turn my head to the left to see a really ripped guy that just happens to be wearing the crest of the Sheikah family that has betrayed the royal family centuries ago. Girls that deserve to be reading this you should know who I'm talking about. All of those who don't have a clue, I love you but your hopeless.

I actually nearly fainted because of who was standing in the same room as me, and no not because he's the love of my life or anything like that. It's the fact that he just happens to be one of my favorite Legend of Zelda characters out there. Even if he really is just Zelda pretending to be a manly man. Psh as if. She could never pull it off. Well I was also in pain, but that's not the point, the point is the one, the only Sheik, was standing right in front of me, and he's not even supposed to be in this story. How about that? That just proves if you're awesome enough you can get just about anywhere.

Sheik's red eyes (which are amazing in real life by the way) just sort of stared at me as I tried to stay conscious. I have a bad past with fainting. Zant, being the little baby that he is, just stalked away huffing like a three year old that got his gameboy taken away from him but knows not to cry about it.

"Chosen One, follow me." I hate it when everyone mixes me up with Srej, it's a pain in the ass. I really truly hate it. I swear it's worse than having a twin.

"I'm not the chosen one you know." I could actually see his eyebrow quirk. God I LOVE that word.

"Is your name Elenya?"

"Okay… Maybe I am the one you guys were looking for." He just turned around and led me down a hall that went down past the throne. At the end of the hall there was a door. Amazing huh? Well that's not the important part, the important part is what lays behind the door. Once Sheik opened it, I thought I was ready to die. No it wasn't a master bedroom or the Triforce (I wish). It was my hell. Don't laugh, okay maybe I'll let you laugh considering how this is a humor story, but what laid behind that old wooden reinforced door was my hell. I knew it wouldn't be pretty or fun just by looking at it. What is it you may ask? Only the LONGEST stair case in the world. Yeah, that's right. The Hylians found away to torture people with out even meaning to and it's not going against any laws. Not that I actually know any of the laws out here. For all I know I broke fifty of them already.

When we finally reached the top of the spiral stair case that was trying to kill me be tripping me a hundred times, I just collapsed in front of the door before us. I swear and I kid you not when I say this, I heard Sheik chuckle. It wasn't much of a chuckle and it only lasted about half a second, but I heard it. I made a Hylian Ninja laugh. Go me. Maybe he really is working for the dark side this time. Oh well my loss.

"Stand up. We are not yet at our destination." Well I would think so. Unless we just came here just to see this empty hallway and this boring wooden reinforced door. That would suck, but to tell you the truth I really wouldn't be very surprised, considering what else I went through.

He opened up the door show me the WORST thing I've ever seen in my life. I swear this is worse than watching Bowser flirt with Princess Peach, and let me tell you, that is disturbing.

"You have got to be kidding me."

"No." I groaned, well here we go. Time to climb up another five million stairs. Yup, I was right, I am going to die today.

"No more! I can't take any more!" I groaned, my legs felt like they were on fire and I was out of breath. This my dear friends is why I never do gym, or exercise. This is pure torture. Where are we even going?

"How is it that a hand picked warrior for the spirits be such a cry baby." Jackass. I can't believe he just said that! It's not my fault I have absolutely no endurance. Well maybe it is, but that's not my fault…

"Look Buddy, I didn't exactly sign my self up for this. I wasn't even meant to come to help Link save Hyrule. It's all just part of one huge stupid mix up. I wasn't the one that was hand picked the one who was hand picked is currently pregnant and with the 'love of her life'; which I say is complete bullshit by the way." He's right though, I'm acting like a total Mary sue, being told I'm immature and only proving the point by crying about it five seconds later, but what does he expect? I'm just a kid.

I shouldn't be here right now…. I should be home pretending to be studying for a test while actually playing Harvest Moon, or complaining to friends on IM… I should be sulking in my room wanting this life that I always read about in fan fictions. I guess you really do have to be careful about what you wish for.

Standing up strait I put my game face on. Well not really, I'm the clown at games that's doesn't really care about who wins or who looses so I'm always laughing about it. That's not the point though, the point is that I'm actually being serious and grown up like at this moment in time; which is scary, so be scared. "Lead the way oh mighty know it all." He just grunted, and I could almost feel him smirking at me, he has one of those smirks like Draco Malfoy or like Andrew's laugh, they'll start and then you just have to follow. Not very long after I started to smirk, and as we pushed on that smirk turned into a grin and that grin into a smile as I followed the one guy who will ever teach me a life lesson that's actually worth knowing.

"What did you mean?"

"Well you seem to know everything and seemed to be one hell of a critic so-"

"No, I mean you said you were caught up in a huge mix up. What do you mean?" Okay Mickey think before you say anything, remember he probably works for Ganon.

"I'm not the chosen one that you think I am, yeah I'm known as Elenya, but I

M not hero material, the one who's supposed to be helping Mr. blue eye Elf-Boy came here after I was, I should be back home with my gamily right now."

"I don't think so. You're here because you're meant to be here and the fate of Hyrule depends on it. You might not have the largest role in helping Link, you might not actually be there for him as he defeats the Twilight, but you give something the others can't."

"Stop being a sage. It's starting to really piss me off." What the hell does he mean by I can give something others can't? Don't tell me I'm actually a Sue after all? Do I have some weird super power that I don't know about? That would put a really strange twist on things.

"We're here." We stopped at another set of reinforced doors. I pushed open the wicked heavy door and saw a figure speaking to a wolf with an imp that's laying on the wolf's back and that's when I realized what's going on.

"Midna…" Everything just stopped and they all looked at me. The wolf looked scared, or ashamed. Poor Link probably thinks that I'll be afraid of him while he's in this form huh? To bad he doesn't know that I already know that he's a wolf and has complete control over his actions.

"So you're her then." A soft Mary sue like voice came from the hooded figure that was Princess Zelda. "The one, chosen by the Spirits to help." As much as I hate to admit it, her voice was real soothing, like birds singing on a clear day that doesn't blind you. "Go with Link and Midna, help them as much as you can."

"I promise I will…" But I can tell you right now it's not going to be much… I'm not tough enough to go fight with him for the shattered mirror, and it's really not a surprise either. I could have told you that before I even first came here. I hate things that are still walking around that should be dead.

"Come Elenya, I'll help you prepare for your journey." I nodded looking calm on the outside put on the inside I was asking myself one very important question. Why the hell do I need to be 'prepared'?

I just followed him out of the room staring at his back afraid to look back into the room, and good that I did, because I have a feeling if I did I would have seen Zelda give up her life for Midna

_____________________________________________________________________________________

"Sheik, is all of this really necessary?"

"Yes, before you can help Link, you need to go on your own mission." We were in what looked like Zelda's old room before the castle was taken over. The linens are all ripped and dirty now, and the comforter isn't in much better condition, just the thought of how it might have looked before hand made me depressed. How something that was once so pretty, turn so ugly because of one person. That is what I define as evil, not trying to take over someone's life, because in all honesty I think that's just stupid, but destroying something beautiful is just wrong in every way.

Sorry I got off track, anyway back to what I was saying before hand, we were in Zelda's room with a heavy sack sitting on what was once her bed. It was completely filled with 'beef jerky' you know dried out meat, and stale bread; which actually isn't all that bad. I felt like I was going out to war, looking back now, I guess you probably could say that I was. This wasn't me getting ready to go to war, this was me getting ready to go to training for the war.

"And that own mission would be… What exactly?" Sheik's ruby eyes looked into mine with that strange look Mori gives Hunny in Ouran Host Club, you know the 'I'm here to protect you and I care for you but not so much that I love you' look. I know it can confuse a girl.

"I am going to train you." His voice was monotone, but it wasn't cold. He knew even back then that he wasn't really going to be able to train me enough for what was going to happen in the future, but the least he could do is try.

"Where?"

"In the village I grew up in. All Sheikah are born there and raised until they live out their missions."

"How long does a sheikah's mission take?" he handed me the bag and took me by the for arm.

"Hold on to me," Next thing I know I'm nearly blind and I'm standing in an old Ghost town… The worst part of it all is I know what this place was like when it thrived a few centuries ago, this is where The old Link was trained by a shiekah too…

"Kakoriko… The Hidden Village…" Sheik let go of me and stepped away.

"No it's no longer the Hidden Village, it's the Forgotten Village…" I haven't felt this way since I saw Superman nearly die… An over whelming sadness that just makes you want to cry, like a haunting or something of the sort. "Let us get settled, then we will begin to train."

What the hell did I get myself into…


	21. I'M NOT A MARY SUE!

"God damn it don't rush me Sheik!"

"The enemy won't wait for you to regain your strength, get up." God this is worse than boot camp, and yes I've actually been to boot camp, it was only one day but it was the worst day of my life.

"No shit Sherlock, but last time I checked, they wouldn't feed me either so slow down and let me finish my god damn breakfast!" It's been a week since I started training with Sheik and I'm so ready to kill him. It's like trying to live with a fitness trainer, you can't eat this and you shouldn't do that. Wake up before the sun is up and run around the whole town for three hours. I don't have a clue how I could have liked him in the first place. He's so freaking bossy!

"When you are done meet me by the windmill." Finally he gave up! You think he would have learned when he tried this on the second day. I took a bite out of my egg and just took a sip of water be fore swallowing the rest whole. I know I'm a pig and I'm going to regret it later, but right now I just want to get the warm up over with so I can actually do the painful stuff before I decide to run away.

I got up slowly trying not to bother my amazingly sore body anymore than I have to, but you know what, I really don't know why I try so hard to not be in pain when I'm going to be forced into to so much pain I'll feel like I'm giving birth in about five minutes. See what I mean? Pointless. I stepped out of the old broken down house that we're staying in and saw Sheik leaning against one of the support beams of the windmill. It's funny how this place use to have a huge windmill at one point and now the only windmill they have here is smaller than most of the buildings.

"Hey Sheik, Why aren't there any people here?" It looked like he was playing with a string or something and as soon as he heard my voice it just went poof.

"Everyone left about a decade ago when the Royal family began to be in danger. It's very hard and dangerous to get in here now so no one knows where we are." Okay just wanted to know why we're the only ones here not the whole history of the town. They left would have been a good enough answer I just wanted to know if they were murdered here or something. Geese.

"Okay so what are we doing today? Swords… bow?"

"No, today is the day we rest." Say what?

"Wait did you just say rest? Whatever happened to 'The enemy won't wait for you to regain your strength.' or 'your enemy will always make it so they have the advantage' or my favorite 'Ganondorf won't stop till both you and Link are dead.' Whatever happened to those huh?" He had a real soft look in his eye before he started to walk down the road.

"I didn't say that we're not training. Come." Okay now I'm lost, but it doesn't matter if I'm lost because he's my guide so I'm going to follow him anyway. Didn't he just say like five minutes ago that we were going to rest? God he's more confusing than Link, and that's pretty hard to do. He managed it though. Oh that soft look in his eye doesn't bother me anymore, just letting you know. It use to, I thought he was Link's twin or something because he has that soft look that really creeps me out, but after about a week of him looking like that and just going real quiet I just didn't think about it and moved on. If there's one thing I've learned from Sheik in the past week it was don't' ask why he does the things he does. It's better off not knowing.

I followed him till we reached a door to a very small shed, okay so maybe it was a SHED per say, more like a very small house. He knocked on the door and to get a response of an old woman's voice yell out,

"Go away you demons!" Which got me to quirk my eyebrow and giggle. Whoever this woman is I like her already, very entertaining.

"Grandmother, I am no demon." Did he just say Grandmother? Dude he has a grandmother?!

"How do I know it is in fact you?" She inquired her old voice cracking, I had to hold in a laugh and another giggle as I saw Sheik's eyebrow twitch. Usually I'm the only one who can do that to him. I love this woman!

Being lost in my thoughts (thoughts meaning my love for Sheik's grandmother) I didn't even notice that he opened the door and the woman was ready to attack. Sheik stepped out of the way quickly putting me straight into the path of attack.

"OW! What the hell was that for?!?!" I yelled looking around for the culprit. I was having trouble finding her because I expected her to at least be around my height. So not being able to see the woman or anyone other than Sheik for that matter, I just blamed him. "Sheik you're such a jack ass! What the hell did I ever do to you?" That's when I heard someone clear there throat. Looking down I saw a very fiery looking old woman calmly standing with a broom in her hand. "Oh…"

"I'm sorry child. I thought that you were all working for Ganondorf."

"Do not worry Grandmother. If she was actually paying attention to her training she would have jumped out of the way." Time to engage the evil glare of death. God I hate him, he's such a pain in the ass.

"Well let's get out of this horrible sun. Come in." I refused to let up on my death glare on Sheik, after everything that happened with in the past week I was pretty damn pissed, I'm so sick of all his teasing and harassing. Some times I actually wish that I was with Link helping him, but then I realize that he's fighting evil dead people and become thankful for not being around. "Child, are you alright?" I should really stop cringing at my thoughts.

"Yeah, I'm fine." I hope Link's okay. I took in the sight around me looking at all the amazing little artifacts around me that you couldn't get anywhere else. "So apparently we're supposed to be here for training."

"Today we meditate." Sheik said.

"Uh, okay? I guess… How long are we going to meditate?"

"Until you find your answer." I don't have a question that I need answered. That's it, Sheik's mental. Deciding on not saying anything I just sat down next to him on the floor and shut my eyes… Okay I'm bored. How much longer do I have to do this? I wonder why he's making me meditate I mean it's not like I actually did anything that I wasn't right? Other than bitch him out every five minutes of the past week. You would too and don't even think about denying it either. He's a jackass and a pain in the ass. He's more of a pain in the ass than Link. I really miss him.

I hope he's okay, Midna is probably taking good care of him, if not I'm going to kill her. Wow that sounded way too protective, but I mean he should be going through Zombie land just about now. How the hell do you kill something that's already dead? It's a concept I've never really understood. I mean seriously what makes them stay on the ground if they were just walking around five seconds ago and were already dead. Maybe it's like a spell or something and it just wears off after a little while. I guess that's the best idea I'll ever come up with considering. Why do I feel like someone's watching me right now?

I opened my right eye only a itsy bit so I could see who was looking at me and strangely enough it was Sheik.

"Paint a portrait it will last longer." I said closing my eye again. You know I'm not finding it too odd that he's staring at me. I've kind of gotten use to it. I mean he has to 'analyze' what I'm doing in order to make sure that I'm doing it right, but half of the time when we aren't training (psh as if that ever happens) I'll catch him staring at me with those ruby eyes searching for something. Like they are right now. "Can I help you with something or are going to tell me I'm doing this wrong?"

"Strangely enough you are doing this correctly."

"Was that an almost compliment Sheik?" I opened both my eyes and leaned on my elbows with a very small smirk on my face.

"If you wish it to be." He's acting so strange, I mean he's actually holding a real conversation, if you could call it that. He looked away from me and started to stare out of a small window, it's horribly small but it gets the job done I guess. "What exactly is the relationship between you and Link?"

"Wait what?"

"Do I truthfully have to repeat myself?" Okay well this is confusing…

"Why do you care?"

"So it's true then… You two are lovers." I stood up and slapped him making a cracking sound echo through the little shack.

"I am so freaking sick of every one calling us lovers! We aren't, you got that?!" I really don't have a clue on why I was being so defensive, but I mean that's just how I am I guess. Right now I'm not too sure of anything, and I don't like it. "It's like the world is trying to hook us up, even though there isn't a point! I'm not going to be around for him when he needs me anyway… So will you all just stop… Besides why do you even care?"

He sighed and he looked at me again lowering his eyes to the ground. It almost made him look well… Guilty.

"There is a legend passed down by our people. About one named Elenya… As you may know she was the one who helped the Hero of Time defeat The Dark Lord." Oh great so now he's talking about Voldemorte. The pedophile of the wizarding world oooh. Hehehe. Okay I know who he's really talking about, but I feel a long dark and depressing story coming along, so I have to make light some how. "You may also know that she was the lover of one of my ancestors." Well I didn't have clue about that one. Next thing I know he pulled out a black string with a pendant that had a crow on it holding the symbol of the Sheikah. Isn't that the coolest thing I've every seen. "This necklace was hers, before she left him, she gave it to him so he would never forget about her. He never did and past in on to his first son. It's been a tradition in my family for the past few hundreds of years."

"That's an awesome necklace and a great story but what the hell does it have to do with you wanting to know if I was Link's 'lover'?"

He shut his eyes for a moment as if he was trying to regain his patience. You know what I just realized? His grandmother went poof. I can't see her anywhere.

" Every time the necklace was passed down we were told to be prepared for her reincarnation to come so they could spend their lives together." Oh jeeze I'm not liking this.

"That is correct. Good job Grandson." Where did she come from? "But you left out two very important parts." she sat down on a very comfortable looking couch, her short stubby legs not even making t over the edge of the plush seating. "Grandson, leave please. I wish to speak to her alone." Why do I feel like I'm about hear something horrible, or at least horribly embarrassing. Sheik nodded and left us alone in the shack and a moment of silence passed between us. To tell you the truth I was dreading the words that were about to come out of her mouth, for multiple reasons. "The important facts that he left out is who you are, and who he is." Don't tell me, please God don't let her say it. "He is indeed the reincarnation of who he was speaking of."

"What's the other important fact…."

"You are the reincarnation of the woman his ancestor was in love with all those centuries ago."

Shit. Shit fudge monkeys, do you know what this means?!?! I'm a freaking Mary Sue!

My eyes started to sting and I started to shake my head in disbelief. There's no way I'm a Sue, just no possible way! I'm human, the spirit said its self that I'm here just because he screwed up, this is all just one big mistake.

"Sorry, but I gotta say you are way off." my voice was shaking like the rest of me. "Once again you guys are mixing me up with Srej. Why do guys always do this?!"

"Your companion is not named Elenya."

"Yeah well you know what Kikyo's reincarnation wasn't named Kikyo! Her name was Kagome! Just because someone has the same name doesn't mean they have the same soul! There's probably a million girls out here called Elenya! And I can guarantee none of them are the reincarnate."

Her eyes suddenly went very serious, she was almost intimidating but her cute shortness threw everything else off.

"The sooner you accept your destiny the easier this journey will be." I am not a Mary Sue. I just stood up and left slamming the door.

"What bull shit."


	22. Why I hate Cities

Nope, not true, I don't believe it. That's what I've been telling myself all day, it's not true and at any moment I'm just going to wake up and see Link standing next to me pretending to be smart. There's no possible way I could be a Su, I refuse to believe it with every fiber of my being. It's wrong on so many levels and goes against everything I believe in, I mean don't you have to be perfect in order to be a Su? I'm pretty sure that's why five million guys fall in love with them at the same time. Can't be me, yet again they've mixed me up with that damn green eyed knocked up Mary-Sue, and I don't' care what they say, just because my name is Elenya, DOES NOT mean that I'm her reincarnation.

Damn Jackasses.

"You are her, and your destiny is to fall in love with my Grandson." I heard the old dirt bag's voice. Yes it was only a couple of hours ago I was telling all of you how much I loved her but you know it's just well, when someone tells you your destined to be some guys lover for the rest of millennia it just might piss you( me) off. "Prophecies do not lie."

"Just because they don't lie doesn't mean they tell the whole truth either. I'm not even from Hyrule therefore; I am not the Su you are looking for." It's a good thing I don't hit my elders, because if I did I'd probably be dead by now, but the thought has crossed my mind a few hundred times within the last couple hundred minutes. "Besides why do you want me to marry him so badly?"

"If you do our family can finally rest."

"Whatever."

"Child, why would you not want my grandson to be your husband?"

"Why would I?" Wow, never thought I'd hear those words come out of my mouth.

"Sheik is a great Warrior, just as his namesake says, and he's such a gentle man."

"You really want me to marry him don't you?" She went silent. "So you don't want me to marry him… I get it, this all has to do with a childhood fantasy doesn't it?"

"More like generations of heartbroken men wishing to be the chosen warrior of our people to be the one to go down in history."

"Well just letting you know, if I marry him he's not going to go down into history. His ancestor will just be even more famous."

She finally gave up and just let me be. I wasn't enjoying this fight anymore than she was but you know I'm not going to let some old woman die believing something completely untrue.

"Elenya, it's time to leave." Did training already end or something? I just looked at Sheik with a raised eyebrow. "You may now return to your friend's side."

"Wait you mean I can actually go help Link again?" Something really fishy is going on here, but you know I really couldn't care any less, I'm leaving and I get to make sure Link's alright. I've been worried about him for the past week. Don't look at me like that, he's pretty much hopeless on his own, and you know it. This is the first time he's actually been on his own to take on the bad guys, before I was around he had Srej, and right after Srej couldn't help anymore because she got knocked up I started going with him. I wouldn't be surprised if he came back barely even alive.

Sheik just nodded his head at me and I leaped up and tackled him.

"Oh my Gods thank you!" I didn't think much on it at the time, but he actually hugged me back and almost seemed as if he didn't want to let go. "Well let's go! Don't want to keep Elf-Boy waiting." My grin just kept getting wider and wider, making my cheeks hurt, but I didn't care, I was too happy.

I let go of him and he took me hand before I was blinded by a white flash, when it went away and I could see again I was standing alone in the middle of Hyrule Field with my sword sheathed to my back. Today's going to be a beautiful day.

So Link should be at either Telma's bar or at the village. I'm going to guess he's at the bar since he should be done with the Spirit Temple just about now. I should start heading over there… but there's one little problem. I don't know where the hell I am… Crap.

"Well that was adventurous," I mumbled finally finding my way to one of the gates to Hyrule Market Town. I really can't wait till I get there; I'm so amazingly exhausted from the run here. I wish I was like Link and had some special thing to call my horse with. I should really think these things out before I actually do them.

God this door is heavy! Seriously it's like trying to open up a wall with no hinge on it, and this is coming from the girl that was just spending the past week in training with the spawn of the devil and his grandmother.

"Open!!!" I grunted pushing it with my back, my arms got really tired so I switched positions while you guys were reading my little monologue.

Giving up I just slid down and then started banging the back of my head against it in frustration and defeat.

"Why? Why won't you open you stupid idiotic, sadistic door?!" I yelled to the sky; which was surprisingly clear. I closed my eyes and just sighed before moaning once again. "okay I'm going to try this again, please I beg of you open this time." Once again I pushed the door and it moved… A centimeter. One freaking centimeter! "What the hell did I ever do to you?!" I asked it in my rage. At this point I was thirsty tired and just plain pissed off. So what did I do you may ask? Kicked the door of course! "OW!"

I started hopping around on one foot holding my injured toes with both of my hands. I could feel them throb which is probably not a good thing. Well this sucks, I'm stuck outside the town completely exhausted, and I'm hungry. I could defenitily go for some chocolate. Or a cheeseburger. Maybe some French fries.

My mouth started to water as I thought up all the foods from back home and all the sweets that I've been missing out on. All my friends are probably eating chocolate covered marshmallows and drinking hot chocolate just because they can. God I hate this.

"Elenya?" I blinked at hearing Link's voice, so what if I know his voice it's not like I stalk the kid or anything. Sheesh you guys really need to take a chill pill.

"Oh my god Link!" I got up, as tired as I was, and pretty much tackled him to the ground. I really missed him and his stupid idiotic-ness. I really did. I missed him so much that I almost cried when I saw him. Hey what can I say? He's the closest thing to a friend that I've got around here.

"Ella, what are you doing here?"

"I came to find you, and why the hell do you keep calling me Ella?" He scratched the back of his head and his face went a little red.

"Well you know in the heat of battle Elenya can be a little too long. By the way, thanks for saving me." I smiled, you know why? Simply because he remembered that I saved his stupid Elf-Boy ass.

"Why you're welcome Mister Elf." I love it how he didn't even ask how I knew where to find him. He just assumed that I knew where. "If you're planning on going to Telma's bar we have a problem. The door is stuck."

"It's not stuck your just weak." Wow doesn't that sound familiar. I held in a chuckle as I just looked at him in a false offended matter.

"I'm not weak…" I pouted and watched him easily push open the gate. "Show off…" He just grinned at me, man I missed this kid so much. I walked up next to him and put my arm around his shoulders, well, I tried to anyway, it's a little hard to do that when the person you're trying to do that too is a lot taller than you.

Trying to keep my arm on his shoulder started to hurt my arm so I just settled for his hand instead. It's cool though because, well, we're tight. Plus it hasn't even been five seconds since we entered the market place and I've already been either pushed and or ran into about five times. We turned down one of the back streets and I saw a tent with three girls standing outside of it in a circle, I love their hair.

Pulling on Link's hand I brought him to the girls, I don't know why he was putting up such a fuss. I only wanted to know where they got their hair done; I mean mine's gotten freakishly long since I got here. When Link first found me it was half way down my back, now it's all the way down to my ass. Plus, it gets in the way when you're trying to kill monsters.

"Excuse us, but where did you get your hair done?" I asked as I tapped the green haired girl on the shoulder. When she turned around and the group looked at us I wasn't sure if I should have been scared or surprised, Link was ready to run at that point, so I'm guessing running would be a good idea.

"EEEEEEEEEEK! It's Link!!!" They all screeched in my ear, that's when he just started to pull me down the road as the girls started to chase us around.

"WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO?!?!" I asked him panting for breath hiding in a small ally way. Damn those girls can run!

"Long story." I looked up at his face and that's when I realized how close together we were. Did I tell you he pretty much pinned me to the wall? No? Sorry that I left that little detail out then.

"Link…" I said real quiet.

"Yeah?" Oh shit not that look, why does he always have to give me that stupid soft look?!

"Could you please give me some breathing space? That would be awesome." VICTORY!!! The soft look has been defeated! Instead his face got real red and just stepped away from me.

"Come on let's go this way. There's a place we need to go to. A friend of mine wants me to meet some of her friends."

"Her? Are you cheating on me?" I asked faking to be heartbroken. I could literally see him freeze, it looked like when they freeze in an anime.

"Ella trust me it's not like that!"

"Oh calm down I was just joking. You know what a joke is right? I mean it's not like we're dating or anything anyway." I just shook my head at him then motioned him to lead the way again. Ah it's good to be back with Link.


	23. Cats and Zombies and dead people

**Thanks To Moonlight Night, I hope this corrects the order and everything and makes you happy**

**I'm so proud of myself I'm at 60,000 words**

* * *

"Link, what the hell do you think you're doing?" I asked him quirking my eyebrow while watching him nearly rip off Telma's cat's tale. I feel so bad for the poor little guy, but you know it's what he gets for drinking my milk.

"He was drinking your milk." His face was so deadpan and his voice sounded as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"So, that doesn't mean you can rip his tail off." He just let go of the cat's tail and let him run off, I could practically hear the cats think 'Well that's the last time I ever help you save a friend'. I just went back to eating my sausage; which by the way is the yummiest thing I have ever tasted in my life! Just letting you know, and this is coming from a girl that usually can't stand sausage, and please no innuendos. Did you know I can't eat hot dogs anymore all because of my mom and my damn brother made a stupid innuendo ate the dinner table at pork and bean night. Till this day I can't eat a ball park frank.

"How is everything Hun?" The very large breasted woman asked me as she leaned over the table, practically letting the whole world see everything underneath that very, ahem, revealing shirt she's wearing. By the why am I the only one in the world that thinks that it's a little weird that a forty five year old woman is flirting with a guy that can't be passed eighteen years old? No? Good. Wait a minute do I even know his age? I've been hanging out with him for about two months and I don't even know his age. How about that?

"It's great thanks and sorry about your cat." Yeah sure you are. I rolled my eyes and just kept eating the food on my plate. By plate I mean plate, yes my friends, it's an actual plate. Not some rock slate but a plate. Why do I feel like I'm trying to make a really sucky poem?

"Don't worry Hun." She pushed herself off of the bar and went back to washing dishes in a very provocative way.

"Hey Link? How old are you?" (A/N This may or may not be true I don't know but I'm making it so it will go in my story)

"Eighteen why?" I shrugged my shoulders.

"No real reason, it's just that we're going to be around each other and I think it's one of those need to know things, ya know?" He obviously didn't get it but he nodded anyway.

"How old are you?"

"Not too sure, but I'm guessing I'm sixteen." To be honest I really don't have a clue how old I am, I don't even know what the date is.

"Right you lost your memory. Sorry," Shit I forgot about that. Right, knew that. It's a good thing I don't know what the date is then. Maybe I should just tell him I have my memory, and that I never lost it. Or I can be not a dumbass and keep it a secret and just go with whatever is going on. I think I'll go with the second idea. Why do I even think about tell him the truth even though I know that I never will? Okay well now that my moment of idiocy is over for this moment. I'll give it another two hours before I end up thinking/ doing something amazingly stupid and or embarrassing.

"It's okay, forget about it." Mickey just shut up and eat your food. Good girl.

I wouldn't look Link in the eye for the next ten minutes, but you know I can't do anything I want to for very long. So… Yeah… Not surprising, but to tell you the truth I'm surprised that I lasted that long, but in my defense he has really pretty eyes. You would probably stare at him too.

"Well now that you kids are done, there's a group of people I'd love you guys to meet." She pointed to the only actual table in the whole bar; oh by the way, why the hell would anyone who owns a bar only have one real table? Does it make any sense to you?

Any way my gaze followed where her finger was pointing and saw four people, a Goth girl that actually looked kind of scary; a guy that looked like the Dad from card captor Sakura. (Yet another A/N I'm sorry I can't remember the people at the table right now, and no one In my accounting class can help because I'm the only dorky person in this room that would actually remember so…And I'm sorry again..) When the the guy that looks like the father from cardcaptor looked at me I looked away because I felt like I was staring at him, and you know when your staring at someone and they realize that your staring at them you just have to look away. It's a common fact that everyone knows. Just so you know the only reason I was staring at him was the fact that someone from a completely unrelated TV show was right there.

I don't think that's what Link thought was going on, or what the nerdy guy thought either, considering how Link suddenly started to get angry and the nerdy guy started to go all red in the face. I just started to stab the remaining pork on my plate. I finished up my milk and just walked over there like the grump I am, but I refused to go alone, so I grabbed Link by the wrist and dragged him over there with me.

"Hi…" I said trying to be nice, but you know I highly doubt that we'll become the best of pals anytime soon. I only got one person to say hi back, and guess who it was?... If you guessed the total geek; you're right. Kuedos. Well at least he's a friendly geek.

Link was glaring at the dude with glasses and just kept staying near me; and to tell you the truth I'm being a little bit freaked out about it. Apparently so wasn't the guy.

"This is a group of people trying to save Hyrule, like you." Telma's voice sort of reminds me of Sailor moon. You know, it's really round almost to the point of being annoying. "There's one more, but he's busy checking out something in the desert." Wait, what? I thought Link already did that place! I could feel my eyes open wide as saucers and my pulse pick up. I can't go there, no, no, no, no, and no. I refuse to go there. This is cruel. Completely cruel, on so many levels. After training and staying with Sheik for a week I still have to go fight stupid Zombies?! What the hell?!

My grip on Link's wrist got really tight, a little too tight apparently, because his wrist afterwards had little half moon shape marks from the damage of my nails. I wouldn't doubt it if his hand was a little blue and will have bruises for a week. Man this is really bad, like really bad.

"Where can we find him?" Shut up Link, don't ask that!

"At the Lake. He'll be on a watch tower. Go talk to him, and here, give this to him when you see him." My eyes are now shut as if I was trying to block everything out with my eyelids. I really hate this. I really hate this, if it was just ghosts I'd be good, but no. There's though zombie things and then those little tremor worms that keep trying to eat you. I'm not afraid of ghosts, trust me I'm not, it's everything else in the world that I'm afraid of.

"Okay, thanks Telma, we'll be back after we check everything out." No, because after this we have to go to that Ice place, and I'm not looking forward to that at all. My death grip on Link's wrist became a liability and made him literally drag me out of there. I couldn't move, I was still in too much shock and fear. I'm not going to be able to sleep tonight. "Ella, are you okay?"

Will he stop calling me that?! I just nodded silently my eyes blank and my jaw shut tight. I was like a marble statue. I couldn't move.

"Are you sure?" I nodded again. "You positive? You look really pale." Of course I look pale, I'm going to have to face the biggest fear that I've ever had, sure I didn't have it nearly as long as my fear of clowns, but this fear takes my breath right from my lungs and makes it hard for me to breathe. I was in a play about Zombies once and I had a nightmare for a month straight, and the play was a comedy.

"I'll be fine, don't worry about it." I wanted to say it, but it couldn't get it out as anything other than a whisper. He pried my fingers from his wrist and had a grimace on his face.

"You have a really strong grip." Him clenched and un-clenched his hand a few times before he grabbed my hand and lead me out of Market Town, with me still feeling like a statue.

"Hey Link." Flames from our fire were popping and the light gave off almost an eerie glow it didn't help that tonight's a full moon either. "Thanks,"

"For what?" For being an idiot.

"A lot of things." I was sitting really close to him, he thought it was because I was cold, but really it's because of my fear of zombies is really starting to catch up with me. If I was alone right now I'd probably be crying. I'm not joking about that either. I started to use his shoulder as a pillow and just stared into the fire. "You took me in, even though I was a complete stranger, you brought me along for one hell of an adventure. Most of all you fed me." I started to laugh and he was chuckling.

"Well while we're saying thanks I have to say thank you for saving me multiple times." I took my head off his shoulder and looked at him.

"Why kind sir, you're welcome." I looked back at the fire of our little camp site and sighed. There's no way I'm going to be able to sleep tonight, and that sucks because I'm really sleepy right now. "Hey Link, do you mind if I sleep next to you tonight?"

"If you want." It's amazing, his face wasn't bright red or anything. What happened when he was in that grove? It's starting to be real hard to keep my eyelids open… He smells really good…

"Elenya, it's time to start moving." I groaned and just wiggled around on the grass, I must have looked like a worm or something.

"Sheik go away… I don't want to train today…" I mumbled.

"If we want to get to the Lake before the sun goes down we're going to have to hurry up." No.

"Oh come on Link let's just go." Shut up Midna. This is evil and I'm cold, and it's windy and I want to sleep.

"Fine I'll get up." I mumbled. Today's just going to be freaking brilliant. "I'm not going to go swimming though…" My eyes were still shut even though I tried to get up and walk over to Link.

"Hey, dumbass we're over here." My eyes flew open and I was not so suddenly pissed off.

"Midna go to hell!" I yelled at her. Really I'm just about ready to kill her. It's the morning and I'm cold and this close to doing something overly stupid. I spun around and just stomped over to where Link and Midna were, he was smiling that goofy smile and Midna was smirking at me. Great, so she's like me, gets pleasure out of other people's pain and annoyance. You know usually I'd be all like wow you're awesome but all I can think about right now is die. "To the freaking Lake we go then." God kill me or make Sheik randomly pop up out of nowhere to come steal me again I beg of you!

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**Kay guys, please review, I don't ask much at all but please review. It's what I live off of now that I've hit my goal of 60,000 words. 3 love you guys**


	24. Almost there and a Creepy Ass Dreams

**(I'm pissed off, I was reading LOZ fan fictions the other day and a girl stole something completely original from my first chapter and to make it even worse the oc was a Sue)**

**well anyway thanks to all of those who have reviewed and all of you who haven't I'm heartbroken. Anyway I have a new goal to get 100,000 words before I finish this so this chapter is a little longer than the others. Hope you all have fun with it 3**

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I hate this. So much. I don't even know how he talked me into doing this the first time.

"Just jump Miss." Shut up you stupid clown. I don't care, I refuse to jump to my death, and why the hell would anyone put this here anyway? Why couldn't they just put stairs or something? Simple, because if there were stairs no one would want to use their little amusement ride and ten they would have to scare little kids away trying to do magic tricks. Damn creepy clowns. I hate them so much.

I've been clutching on to my cuckoo for at least half an hour and Link was a complete idiot (wow big surprise there) and decided that I could come down all on my own. Apparently he forgot the first time we came. He had to literally push me out of the building of horrors. I'm surprised that he didn't come back up yet to see what was taking so long. I don't want to go down there, especially if it has to do with me having to trust a chicken that's been trying to kill me by slowly pecking off my hands.

"Looks like you need a little PUSH!" I felt his hands come into contact with my back as he pushed me off the ledge of the building. The reasonable thing would be for me to hang onto the cuckoo and glide down like I saw Link do a while back, but no because I'm an idiot and I can't do anything right.

That's right ladies and gay guys, I let go of the only chance I had in order to stay alive, and I dropped straight into the water, and I said that I WASN'T going to go swimming today. Well, I guess you can't really call it swimming it's more like screaming while falling into the deep depths of some lake and forcing some poor guy to come save me. Yeah, that's right it wasn't even Link who saved me, it was some really random guy that just happened to be there.

"Are you okay?" Let me correct what I said, a really hot random guy was there to save me, and we were both panting for breath, mostly him because he was dragging me through the water.

"Yeah, I just can't ever go swimming again in my life."

"Sorry about that, I'll never understand why they won't put stairs in." Finally a guy with some sense!

"Or just a place that doesn't have man eating evil clowns." He quirked his eyebrow at me and just chuckled.

"Don't like clowns?"

"Hate them what the hell were they thinking? Making us get here by flying chicken." I just went on a little rant and didn't even notice Link was running towards us, too bad Link didn't realize that he never changed out of his wolf form. Yeah that's right, he got to go through a portal with Midna to get here, but me, no for fear of me turning into a monster I had to go through hell and not go through a portal. "Oh thanks by the way for saving my ass."

"No problem, it's not every day a guy like me gets to save such a pretty girl." That's when we took notice that Link was there, he started growling and snarling at the poor guy, the guy didn't even flinch. "Demon, wait."

"He's not a demon! He's a poor little wolf, why is it everyone mixes a wolf up with a demon? It doesn't make any sense. It's not even like they look alike!" I came out from behind the Macho Man, and started to scratch Link behind the ear. "Hey buddy."

"You're a sorceress! Only someone with great magical power can calm a beast like that!" I just turned around and looked at him with a dead panned look on my face.

"You're an idiot. Come on buddy let's go find you some fish to eat." Oh great we're going to have fish for dinner again. Can you guys feel me rolling my eyes?

"Wait Miss! What's your name?!" I just kept walking with Link and once we were out of sight of every one that's when Midna came out to play.

"How did you know we weren't going to hurt you? Mister Beasty here seemed pretty vicious."

"I saw your shadow." I replied before Link turned back into an elf. "But she has a point. Why were you so mean to the poor guy Elf-Boy?" I cocked my head to the side like a dog would when confused.

"I thought he was going to hurt you," He replied his face held a little tiny bit of pink and a huge scowl was on his face. It was like he was trying to hide the fact that he was embarrassed with him being over protective of me.

"Well actually he saved me so…" My eyes were wandering around the area looking for something to look at other than Link's face. "Let's go find that dude." I know, I know. I don't want to go to that Jail Cell place but I'm not supposed to know about how evil it is yet so I can't really do anything. You know what I just remembered. That thing about me turning into a monster because of the portal is complete bull shit. "Midna you bitch…" I mumbled.

Yeah, yeah I know it's my fault I'm a moron. I should have remembered that it wouldn't have changed me. I'm going to kill her one of these days I swear. Her and Link, I blame him for this too. Like I keep saying his stupidness keeps rubbing off on me. Soon my brain will be nothing but mush for those zombies to eat slowly.

"Why am I a bitch?" She giggled. She knows I just figured it out and that I'm probably going to try to kill her and fail miserably. Just like those multiple times I tried to kill Link. Seriously these two are going to be the death of me. God help me.

"You knew that I wouldn't turn into an evil monster thingy! And you knew I was afraid of that death house," I pointed to the building on the edge of the cliff, where yet another insane stupid customer was jumping from. "But did you teleport me down here nooooo, instead you thought it would be funny to see me torture and die." "No that was just a plus." She floated out in front of us, I know that there's barely anyone here but someone could still see her if they were like Kyouya from Ouran and just pop up from the shadows. "Since your just some boring girl there really is a high probability for you to turn into a monster."

"Yes you did! You teleported me out of that temple place!" And without even thinking on it too. So either now she's telling the truth, or she was being a complete heartless bitch back then and didn't care what the hell happened to me.

"Well, I really didn't think you were that important back then… Not like I think you're very important right now, but now you're more like a servant to us then you were back then. You're not just a waste of space." Let me translate what that means in human being terms. She said that she actually likes me as a person…. Wait a tick… did she just call me her servant?

Apparently Link wanted to be alive for another few years or so, because he decided then to split up the fight we were having. Maybe he was a little wise, or maybe he's just annoyed with us. Yup he's annoyed, his eyebrow is twitching.

"Let's just go to see Telma's friend already, okay?" He said taking in a deep breath obviously trying to keep his temper under control, but you know what it's not like he's some short tempered guy so I don't know why he's taking yoga breaths. It's kind of stalker-ish. Kind of reminds me of Science class when I was sitting in front of Andrew… Oh come on Mickey, now isn't the time to feel homesick.

To tell you the truth, I'm not too sure if I'm homesick or not. Sure, I'll miss the people that I use to live with and all that, but in reality, if you could call this reality, I really think if I had a choice, I would choose to stay here. I don't think I've actually been this happy in a while. Well not right now, but before when I was just with the kids and Kehoe.

Anyway, Link started to drag me by the wrist up this hill like thing, I'm not too sure you could actually call it a hill because it was more like a cliff than a hill. About five minutes later we were on at the closest part of actual dry land to the desert of Death, and Link was waiting for me to climb up. How do I know he was waiting for me to climb up? Simple, he was staring at me dead pan. I remember back when I didn't think that he talked a lot, it's not that he doesn't talk a lot, it's just that when he wants you to do something then he won't actually tell you, instead he'll just kind of give you the Gibbs stare down until you do it.

"I'm not climbing this." I stated with a whole bunch of sass letting him know there was no way in hell he could get me up there. "Besides, she didn't want me to go meet the dude she wanted YOU to go meet him, so just come down when you've finished all that business. M'kay?" Yet again he said nothing, just instead rolled his eyes and let a little groan of annoyance come out from his throat before he actually started to climb the latter.

There's no reason why I would go up there, absolutely no reason what so ever. Even if Link needed me to help him kill Ganon, I wouldn't go up there. I like the stable ground thank you very much. You would think that it wouldn't talk very long for him to get a stupid note from what's his face only to get blown up. But apparently, it takes about an hour and a half, or at least that's how long it felt.

All I've been doing that whole time he's been up there was pulling grass out and letting it fly in the wind having most of it land on me. After making huge dirt whole I just decided to lie down on the grass and just stare at the sky. We'll be going up there soon. How is it there's absolutely no clouds yet I can't see the Sky Kingdom… That didn't make any sense to me in the game and definitely doesn't make any sense to me now.

I rolled over to the right so I was about five feet away from the latter. Why did I do this? It's really simple actually, I saw Link start to come down. About two thirds of the way down, he jumped off and landed perfectly.

"Show off." I mumbled at him, shaking my head at him and dusting the grass off of my clothes. "So, what now?" Still no response. He was ignoring me, and quite frankly it's pissing me off. I wanted to yell at him 'what's your problem?!' but I just followed him down to the clown with an obsession of shoot things out of a canon.

I'm not going to tell you about how we got here, because in all honesty it wasn't very pleasant. Link is still refusing to talk to me and I'm stilling holding in a total wtf moment. Seriously he's acting like a jack ass. I know, it's my favorite word and that I call everyone a Jack ass but in my defense this time he was really acting like one this time.

It doesn't really help that I'm overheating and thirsty, not to mention tired. Plus all these Tremors keep coming up to try to eat us. You know what a Tremor is right? I mean you've seen the movie? It's this giant bug that feels vibrations to find it's pray and it'll eat you, but the only thing it can't go through is rock. Just like these little worm things.

So, we're running from rock to rock trying not to get eaten, all the while my tummy is starting to talk to me and I'm trying to cope with some guy that's PMSing. It's when we got to about the third rock when I came up with a pretty good idea all on my own.

"We should wait till night time before we start moving again. It'll be cooler and easier for us to travel." … Okay so I got the idea from Avatar, sue me! It's not like it's a bad idea though, and it's not like we're going to find our way home using the stars, we're just going to sit around till Night and then move then, plus it'll be easier for me to assassinate those green pig things, because you know they won't be able to see me but I'll be able to see them.

Did you know I was born with night vision? Well, not really but I can see things a lot better at night than I do during the day. So I think this is the best idea I've had in a whi- Oh my GOD get it away, get it awaaaay!

One of the tremors jumped up on the rock we were standing on and I just kind of, well, I freaked out so I kicked it away. By away, I mean I kicked it like an anime character would kick a foot ball. That sucker went flying.

"Ewwwwwww, I touched it," I cringed at the thought of physical contact with the icky worm thing. God that was gross. I started to hear a chuckle, and then the chuckle turned into laughter, and the laughter turned into hysterics. It's official, he's lost it. The heat's finally gotten to him. "Why are you laughing?" He was still laughing and now I could hear Midna's ghostly snicker too. "Okay seriously what's so funny?" I don't like being laughed at just like the rest of the human population, and quite frankly, this is pissing me off. That's when I felt it, something was petting my leg… I looked down and saw… Actually I'm not too sure what it is but it's cute.

"How the hell did you find it funny that this cute little guy was nudging my leg?" It was finally night time and Link started talking to me again. It was amazingly easy to see what was going on and we could walk because those worms weren't chasing after us right now.

"It looked like it wanted to climb up your pant leg." I still don't know what was so funny about it. It really is cute though.

"So little guy," I started to hold it in my arms and started to pet it like Dr. Evil from Austin Powers. "What should your name be?" Link went over to pet it and then it started to go all defensive. Apparently it favored me over him; which I loved. "Tamaki, I'll name you Tamaki." Why Tamaki, you may ask, well simply because he's all defensive and yet so cuddly. I would name him Mitskuni but that's too much of a mouth full for me to handle.

"What's a Tamaki?"

"A really cute bunny fox thing apparently." It really was the cutest thing I've ever seen… Now back to killing some green pigs…

I put Tamaki down and took out my bow and an arrow and just locked on to the Green Pig on look out duty. Bye, bye Greeny. And he just fell down and no one noticed either.

"Try to take out the look outs first and then shoot the actual guards." I said notching my next arrow. After picking them off one by one and having Tamaki keep an eye out just in case there are monsters that just randomly became smart we finally started to go ahead towards the fire. Once we got there my tummy refused to be ignored any longer. "I think we should take a dinner break." I said eyeing the huge amount of pork being roasted on the fire that's now surrounded by dead bodies. Believe it or not, the smell of pork was actually really strong compared to the smell of dead stinky pigs. So we decided we could take just another yet smaller brake.

"Hey you have any water left?" I asked him, knowing my canteen that I just 'randomly' had on me was empty, I might be a dumbass but I'm not so stupid that I would be completely unprepared for this. My only problem is how exactly can you be prepared to see the walking dead? I mean seriously?

"I have barely any left. We have to be very careful." Well, doesn't that suck? We might actually die out here. Well, that's what I was thinking anyway, until I saw a tent flapping in the wind. The sandy, dusty, wind. "Tamaki, go check that out…" It looked like it didn't understand a word of water I was saying, but you know, I don't have any magic powers that let me have the ability to go talk to animals… Actually I might not but a certain someone does…

I looked at Link with my eyebrow quirked (ha I will never stop loving that word) and a smile turning the corners of my lips. He figured out what I was thinking before I actually had to say. Brownie points for Elf-Boy.

"Fine." He had Midna turn him into a wolf and apparently they were talking to each other even though to me it looked like they were such staring at each other. When he transformed back into a wolf I realized something… Midna could have translated for me. Oops, well let's leave this a secret shall we? Well anyway, the message was given and it sprinted off in the direction of the flapping tents. Link turned back into a human and I decided to give him my reasoning.

"Thanks. If my plan works out we might just not die here."

"What do you mean?"

"I think there might be some water in there. It'll be old but we could probably drink it." Like I said before, I'm not that smart, but that doesn't mean I'm a total dumbass. We waited for another few minutes before ti came back with a full canteen of water.

"She said it's fresh. There's a little oasis over there." Midna said coming up out of nowhere.

"Couldn't you have told us earlier that you could speak to animals?" She just went back into Link's shadow, before we started to hoof it again. It's a good thing we're almost there. There should be more resources at the grounds.

We're lucky, we got there before the sun got up, which means now we can rest. Yeah, the lovely joy of sleep. Oh how I love you…

Now only if Tamaki would stop licking my face.

"Please stop, Mickey's tired." I mumbled, before falling asleep.

* * *

Now, I had a dream that day, and I was wondering if you wanted to know what it was…Yes? Okay, well this is what happened.

I was walking through Ordan in my everyday clothes, and by everyday clothes I mean the tunic and leggings I made with Ilia's clothes. So, I was walking through Ordan and everyone seemed happy, everything was back the way it was before we were kidnapped by the walking pigs, except for one thing. Ilia was clinging onto someone else's arm. I couldn't put a name to the face, but I know for a fact that he wasn't Link, for starters this guy was really tall, and well not blonde. But they looked happy.

She saw me and started to wave me over, so me being me I actually went over to see what she wanted, like any normal person would.

"Yeah?"

"How's everything coming along? Our preparations are all set, is Link helping you at all?"

"Helping with what?" Ilia's grin just grew as if she thought I was making a joke.

"You're wedding silly! Don't tell me you really forgot."

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"NO!" I nearly yelled as I jumped up from my sleeping spot that just happened to be right next to Link. Oh god this is really going to be a really suckish trip isn't it.


	25. Zombie Manor, More like Hell Castle

**I don't know how I get myself into these strange little situations, but they always have a few things in common; firstly Zant always happens to pop up randomly, secondly Link always somehow can't possibly help me, and three I always have this horrible feeling that I'm about to die. So yet again, Link did something stupid to leave me fending for myself and I have to save his poor little Elf ass and save the world too. **

**What did he do this time? Well how do I put this lightly?… He pissed off fricken Gannon and got his stupid tool of a Twili to come do the dirty work. The tool happens to hold grudges too, because this time while Link is being chased around in a circle while spinning on a top of death, I happen to be fighting a little creation that Zant made just for me. A lovely, rotting, decaying corpse. **

**Just like last time I think I should tell you about how this idiotic meeting happened just like last time we met Zant. Oh god I'm going love beating the hell out of that stupid little tool. You know what, no he's not even a tool he's the whole damn box. That's right he's a tool box. How does that feel Zant?**

* * *

**Only god know how long ago……….**

* * *

"**No! I'm not going in there!" I made it this far, we beat the hell out of that giant green pig, so now we can actually go in, but I can't get any farther. I just can't. If I go in there I can't turn back towards safety. Hey, don't look at me like that. I'm deathly afraid of zombies and ghosts, and as I keep telling you over and over again, I'm a damn coward. So I'll probably just die from just being in there. **

"**Seriously, Ella come on, we need to go in there!" No we really don't. Link and Tamaki, the newest addition to our team, we trying to drag me in. Link was dragging me by my arm and Tamaki was trying to get me to move by pulling my pant leg. Psh, like that's going to help them. "We're almost done!"**

"**Dude, this is a castle made for the tortured souls of prisoners. Usually I would jump at the opportunity to be where a great story has been, but there's dead guys in there!" I don't even care if they pick up on the fact that I know way too much information, I'm not going in there. **

"**There's dead guys in the graveyard back at the village, and you love it there." So true, but those dead people aren't going to jump at me anytime soon, or screech at me to freeze me to the ground so they can suck my soul. **

**Apparently Midna was sick of us taking so long, but you know what I can't really blame her, but seriously I am going to kill that bitch, anyway back to what I was saying, she just decided on using her magic to pick me up and literally throw me into the Castle of Death. Accidentally, when she threw me in there she just also happened to make Tamaki and Link fly in there too.**

"**Ow," Great now my back kills, and I have to go through the damn place, this is seriously going to suck ass. I slowly got up, trying not to put myself through anymore pain. Link was following suit, except I guess he's little bit more use to it than me because he just got up. He didn't take for ever unlike me. **

**Now that I'm up we have yet another problem. One claw shot and too people with a bunny fax thing. How is this going to work? That's when I saw Tamaki jumping from stone to stone. It isn't just a fox rabbit, it apparently is also part ninja. It was just sitting on the last stone platform waiting for us to get over there. Link, being the jackass he is, wrapped one arm around my waist before sending us off to the platform using the clawshot. **

"**Gross." I mumbled jumping away from him as soon as possible, I was just hugged by an overly sweaty smelly Elf, but you know what, I probably don't smell too great either. Ick man sweat. **

**Tamaki, once again ditched us and jumped to the next plat form, waiting for us at the gateway to hell. Link, being quicker and stronger than me ran across the moving sand with very little ease, and when I saw him struggle at one part of his treck across the sand and I wondered how the hell I was going to get over there. This is not going to be fun.**

"**Stupid sand, pointless evil sand." I muttered trying my best to not get sand stuck in obnoxious areas of clothing, and/or not to get sucked into the constantly moving sand that was being sucked in by a random black hole in the center of the room. I didn't have to worry about the little tremor bug things, they didn't want to bother me for some odd reason. I think I was giving off weird vibes, I mean it was bound to happen I was pissed off at the world and my glare was probably going to burn up anything I look at. **

**I was nearly at my waist when I reached the platform in front of the Gate Way to Hell. It was awkward to move even the slightest bit, but I was almost there. That's when I had a sudden appreciation for all of Link's amazing muscles and their strength. I mean I never thought of myself as light. So him pulling me up must have been painful. It didn't really help that there was sand sticking to my sweaty skin. So my objective was not reached. God I hate this so fricken much. **

**With one last heave he pulled me up onto the platform and I went really far, well by that I mean I ended up landing on top of him.**

"**I'm tired let's go home now." I said to tired to get off of him. He started to chuckle, then he coughed a little bit. This heat was making us too exuasted, it was starting to get hard for us to move. Well at least it was starting to get too hard for me to move. Link isn't human so he's doing pretty well. Better than me anyway. Now that we got this far the only problem we had to figure out and by figure out I mean tell Link to do it, was to go to the lever. **

**I finally rolled off of him and slowly started to get up. I nearly fell asleep right there. But I would rather die trying than die in this place. I mean seriously? Who would want to be the person that gets turned into one of these little monster things. Link quickly got up and started to investigate how to open up the gate. **

"**Try the pulley lever." I said not evening bothering to get up.**

"**Where?" I pointed to behind the fence next to me. Link was just about there when I heard a hiss come from Tamaki, so apparently it's part cat too. Who would have thought?**

**This is the time when I froze. I completely froze, there's nothing I could do, I'm not even sure if I was breathing, I can't remember. All I remember is seeing million tiny little skeletons pop out of the sand holding weapons and gathering around Link. I wanted to help, I swear, but I couldn't. I was frozen to my spot as I heard the screeches come from the mini-skeletons. It was like hearing the screech of nails on a chalkboard. **

**For a moment everything went silent before I felt Tamaki's short fur rubbing against my arm. I was ready to cry. I don't think I've ever been that horrified in my life. Even watching Zira's death didn't scar me as much as this one tiny moment.**

**I seemed to come back to reality as I heard the metal clanking of the gates rang in my ears. And to think, this was just the beginning.**

"**Ella, are you okay?" No, I'm not okay. I'll never be okay again in my life. And to think, it only gets worse from here on. I'm going to die here. At least I had a good life.**

**I didn't feel as cold as I did nearly three seconds ago, and I didn't feel so numb, now I barely even nodded my head, but it was enough to tell him I was fine, or at least good enough to go on. **

* * *

**Later deeper in the Arbiter's Grounds**

* * *

**I've been hanging off of Link for the past only gad knows how many hours. He's my main protection right now. When ever I had to let go of him because he had to go into doggy form I would tie Tamaki to me and then it would protect me. Usually I would fight for myself but, I just can't deal with this. It's the rats and bugs I can deal with, everything else I just can't. I can even kill most of the tremors, thanks to my special training with my Hylian Ninja. I can't believe I'm bringing this up now but I feel bad for leaving things the way I did. But I just can't leave him thinking that we were destined to be together or what ever. **

**Well anyway, back to what's going on here. I'm currently waiting for Link to finish up so I can leave my happy place and we can get out of here. You see we set up a little system, Link goes ahead and I fall back just a little with Tamaki. So Link will be able to be just about done with what ever is going on by the time I get there. I highly doubt it's going to work out for too long though.**

"**Ella, it's clear." Link said coming back to me. I feel a little ridiculous because of this but I would rather go through this than just go freeze up and then die. If you guys are laughing at my reasoning I'll kill you I swear. **

**I nodded and held on to his arm as we passed through some door… Let me rephrase that, some door that led us to a huge dark creepy room with a really cool sword in the center of it that was stuck into the ground with charms hanging from it's handle almost in the form of a tent, and that stupid door wouldn't open. So we were locked in a creepy dark room together. I new something bad was going to happen, but I couldn't remember what boss it was, if I don't know that, then how the hell am I supposed to help Link when he screws up? **

"**Link? I don't want to be here." I whispered tears stinging my eyes. My heart was beating fast and I felt as if I just swallowed lead. **

"**It'll be fine, we got this far haven't we?" Just because we got this far doesn't mean that we'll get any farther. Jeeze he's a real moron sometimes. **

**Despite my thoughts I didn't say anything, I just stood there quietly cutting off circulation to Link's arm. I reminded myself of the Cowardly Lion from the Wizard of OZ, I kept going forward, centimeter by centimeter. Courage isn't being afraid of nothing, but having the strength to face your fears my ass. I'm not going to be under the title of Courageous in Hyrule's books of Legends, and I'm facing my goddamn fears. That saying is complete bull shit. It's so untrue. For if it was true I would be considered brave, which I'm not. **

**Link started to walk toward the center if the room, and of course that means that I was dragged along with him. I was as scared by the time we got to the sword and nothing happened, but the heaviness in my stomach just grew. **

"**Why in the world would someone want to tie up a sword like this?" Link asked examining the ropes that held it down.**

"**Link, I really don't want to be here." I whispered, tears started to roll down my cheeks. **

"**Well, we can't just leave, the door won't open." I don't know what he was thinking when he cut the rope in front of him, but let me tell you this now. It makes me want to kill him, because right after he cut the rope I heard a low deep hum, and when I heard that great deep hum the sword started to move and characters were glowing red on the black blade. **

**It wasn't till when a giant ghost came out a roared that I fainted… Well at least I think I fainted because I can't remember anything other than falling down and getting really dizzy. Well that and Link yelling something, but I do remember waking up and Link leaning over me.**

**Poor guy… I look at him for .5 seconds and decide on jumping him. Must have scared him half to death. Not only that, but he is now officially soaked, yes with sweat, but also with my tears because when I saw him I was so terrified that I needed a cry. **

"**Link… I want to go home…"**

* * *

**Some time later in the colder part of the grounds…**

* * *

**Well, I'm happy to say we're almost out of this death pit, I really can't express how happy I am, but I can't tell you how horrified I was at the thought of having to fight a giant skeleton five times bigger than my house. **

**How is it that I stayed with Link for the whole second half of the Arbiters Grounds? Well the answer to that is simple, I didn't. We both agreed that it would be safer for me to just wait at the half way point. Well I guess you couldn't really call it a half way point, but it's that room were nothing comes out at you and you need the spinning top thing to rotate the room… or the walls or what ever. Don't worry, I wasn't alone in that little room either, Tamaki was with me. Curled up on my lap I think it's more cat than anything else because it was purring while I was petting it's fur. **

"**You know Tamaki, I really hate this place. I hate it so much I would rather go back into training with Sheik…" I think at this point the purring was just it snoring because it didn't have any reaction to what I was saying. "Who actually isn't that bad of a guy. He's just overly cheesy and has a completely insane Grandmother… Actually… she might be right about my whole destiny… But you I just didn't want to admit it because that would turn me into a Mary sue… I wonder how Srej is doing?" Hey guys don't look at me like that, it's not like I'm worried or anything, it's more along the lines of I just want to see how everything is happening. But you know what? I'm happy I'm not there right now, because if I was then I would have to deal with a pregnant Sue, and no one that's sane would want that. I guess I chose the lesser of the poisons. **

**There was a figure that came walking through the door way and that automatically set off Tamaki's hissing fit. **

"**Hey calm down it's just me." Link said looking exhausted. **

"**You okay?" I asked patting the ground next to me. He just nodded and came to sit next to me leaning against the wall. I yawned before resting my head on his shoulder. "You know maybe we should both take a nap before moving a head." I don't think he heard me because he was already asleep, but Tamaki heard me and was definitely with my suggestion. "G'night" I mumbled before letting my eyes shut.**

* * *

**So I guess that brings us to now, because the rest is pretty much history. Oh come on don't make me say it… FINE be that way stop your complaining I'll describe it for you, you big babies. Seriously… Anyway once we entered the room of complete evilness Zant came out and said something about being surprised that we got this far and threw some crappy ass joke my way, something along the lines of having a little present for me. In all honesty I wasn't really paying attention, which probably just really pissed him off. I'm honored that he cares that much, truly I am. **

**I was too busy looking around the room to see what he was doing, I know I'm stupid, but that's not really surprising for I've been with Link all this time and he's one of the biggest debases I've ever had the pleasure of meeting. **

**So after getting roared at by a giant skeleton Link set off on the spinning top thing. Of course I can't really do anything, so instead of fighting the non existent Zombie that will soon be my death, I just cheered Link on. Giving him my full moral support.**

"**LINK KICK IT'S *&$ING ASS!" I screamed, which was an amazingly stupid mistake (surprise there) and made Stallord (A/N I hope you guys are happy with this chapter after all the walkthroughs I had to watch/read to make it seem not so horrible) shoot purple acid at me, which just so you know smelt like the worst thing I've ever smelt in my life. It's like a million rotten corpse, what type of corpse, not a damn clue, but it smelt horrible. "Oh shit." Tamaki started hissing at it. Stupid Animal. "Hiss later run now!" I screamed picking it up and sprinting away from the acid that was slowly melting the sand stone that was the foundation of the room. **

**I heard a huge crack and saw that the Stallord grow a few feet shorter. YAY LINK! Link came back up stumbling and tripping through the piles of sand and dead bodies. You must be wondering why I haven't fainted or died yet, and that is a very difficult question, quite frankly I don't know, but I have a feeling it has something to do with the fact that it's just a giant pile of bones at this point. I mean the last thing was a Ghost that had a giant sword and could move around and kill me in five seconds, this thing cant' even turn around. See it's a lot less intimidating. Even though it spit acid and has me as it's main focus.**

"**Ella look out!" I heard Link shout from somewhere in the room, and he had very good reason. Even though the body of the Stallord couldn't turn around as a whole it's head was a completely different story. And yup you guessed it, it started to spit more acid than a druggy mixed with an Alien. **

"**Where the hell does this stuff even come from?!" I screeched as Link started to yet again attack the spin of the monster, just needs to go down one more before it completely crumbles. "LINK GET YOUR ASS UP HERE!" I screamed seeing it take a swipe at him and the top start to slow down. Once he got up here he went strait back down though. I'm starting to think that he wants out even more than I do.**

**Finally he made the thing collapse and as the sand started to drain out of the room I jumped down and rolled right into his legs.**

"**Hi." He looked at me with a smile on his face.**

"**Hi," He obviously thought we were done, stupid Elf-Boy. "You ready to get out of here."**

"**Psh please Elf-Boy I've been ready." That when I decided to sit right next to him and have Tamaki stand on it's own for a little while. You never know how small that platform is going to be in reality. So he used the top as a little key and kept spinning it till we were standing on a pillar just about ½ the size of the room, which is still pretty large. That's when the head decided on waking up and tried to knock both of us off of the top. I'm smart and jumped out of the way, Link how ever… Well lets just say he's not going to feel too nice tomorrow. In all honesty I'm surprised he survived. I mean we're WAY up. "YOU OKAY?" I yelled down to him, that's when I heard a sadistic chuckle and a horrible screech. **

"**Now we can't have you being bored all the way up here can we?" **

* * *

**So I think it's alright to now say that I caught all you up right? Okay now that your all happy now can I get back to me being horrified by a Zombie that's never going to stop dripping gross death dribbles on the sandstone flooring. And as I stated earlier, I would call out for Link except he's a little busy getting chased around by a giant floating head. **

"**Hehehehehehehehe," Yup that's right, I'm taking out my fear by laughing, maybe I can actually get through this. "hahahahahaha HAHAHAHAAHAHA" I could still here the un even steps that were being taken by the greenish purplish rotting corpse before me. I took my sword out from it's sheath, yes I've had it this whole time, and started chopping it like the madwoman I am not, I can only think how crazy I looked mercilessly chopping the decomposing body into pieces. I was so intent on making sure this thing would never even twitch again that I wouldn't stop even though it was oozing all over me a and my sword.**

"**Ella stop I think you killed it enough."**

"**DIE!! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA" I said before laughing maniacally.**

"**ELLA STOP!" Once I came back to earth from my craze massacre of the body, I started breaking down. I now major mood swing, but at least I didn't need Link… Well I didn't need Link much. "I think it's safe to say it won't be coming back from the dead."**

**I almost laughed, the jackass.**

"**I just want to go home." I mumbled into his shoulder. And at that moment I really did, I wanted to go back to my little crappy house filled with my jackasses of brothers and my Mother who wanted nothing less than a perfect daughter.**

"**Let's get out of here." I just nodded never letting my head up from his shoulder no matter how bad he smelt. But hey, I probably don't smell like a bunch of roses either.**


	26. Winters Suck

**AN: Okay well I apologize for not updating sooner, I'm almost done with the next chapter so forgive me I haven't been able to type as much as I use to you know looking for colleges and all that jazz. So I hope you have a good read.**

* * *

It's cold, and I'm pissy, and angry and sick, and of course there's only one person in this world to blame for that. That's right, when the world starts going against me there's only one person to blame, the one the only Elf-Boy. Thank you. Why is my current state all of his fault? Simply because he's the jackass that made me climb this god damn mountain in nothing other than summer clothes. He thinks that just because he doesn't need winter clothes to walk through a mountain (that is currently in the middle of a blizzard by the way) means that that the rule applies to everyone else too. God I hate him, but you know what? It could also be a lot worse; I mean I could be trudging through the snow with wolfos chasing after me every five seconds.

Oh yeah, that's right I'm inside the nice warm living room of the ruins of that big mansion in the middle of absolutely no where, while Link, that jackass, is facing his punishment that he rightly deserves, and that my dear readers just happens to be out in the bitter cold trying to go through a completely frozen house. I know that the blame lies with Link because, hey it's obvious. If he just simply let me go grab some winter clothes or at least maybe some boots, I wouldn't be worried about getting frost bite on my toes and maybe fingers. So, his going though this place on his own is completely all his fault.

I've been staring into the fire for the past half hour or so, trying to get as warm as possible without catching on fire, luckily I had some company with me, no it wasn't Tamaki, we left him in Kakariko Village where it's warm and no wet, so we could do this. No, my company was really starting to piss me off right now, she wouldn't freaking shut up.

"Your husband good man." A soft willowy voice stated as she saw Link run through the living room for about the fifth time today.

"Don't have one." Now shut up.

"Fiancée?"

"Debatable," I stated promptly. Hey don't look at me that way, I wasn't talking about Link in any possible way, I was thinking about Sheik when I said that, not because he really is engaged with me but because of that whole bull shit prophecy. "But in my opinion, no."

We fell into an awkward silence but you know what? I really didn't care and talking was giving me a headache. The red glow from the fire place and black shadows were dancing off of the walls as I pulled the quilt that was surrounding me closer to my body. My eyes started to feel heavy, heavy to the point that when I blinked they wouldn't reopen. So since I wasn't going anywhere I thought it would be safe to take a nice nap.

Of course, yet again… I was wrong.

"Ella! Are you okay?!" No, I'm dead you stupid Nazi Elf! Now leave me alone.

"I think your wife sleep now." I'm not his wife! Of course I didn't have enough energy to actually say that but you know, I thought it and it's the thought that counts. Just like I'm thinking about repatively hitting Link over the head with a chair leg that was just with in my reach, and somehow the thought of him constantly being hit over the head was making me a little happier every second.

"Oh, Okay, well when she wakes up, do you think you could talk her into having some of the soup your husband is making." No, I know the rule starve a fever feed a cold, but I don't trust anything an ape man makes. Well that's not completely true I trust his cooking abilities just as much as I trust my own. Which really isn't all that much. I really can't cook if my life depended on it. Okay that's a lie if I had to chose cook or die I would choose cook, but the point is that I suck at cooking and I don't really trust that guy's cooking very much, I'd rather have Link cook it. He's really good at cooking fish, it's his specialty.

"I'm not….Eating…An…ythin" I mumbled before I got comfortable and slept on the nice warm smoky living room. It was kind of like sleeping at Leah's house. She has this iron stove in her living room and usually it smokes us out before we can get warm. The last thing I remember was feeling something soft touch my forehead before passing out.

* * *

When I woke up I was still freezing even more so now that my blanket had slipped off of me while I was twisting in my sleep. I was still tired even though I woke up. It was the cold that ripped me out of the dream world and also my need for liquids, and maybe the bathroom, yeah, definitely the bathroom. Slowly getting up, I walked over to the door far away from where I was originally laying down and I nearly tripped over my own two feet along with still feeling a little dizzy from my illness. I wrapped my blanket around my shoulders even tighter than before as I got further away from the fire place, the cold is not my friend and never will be my friend. I say it now and I will never take it back, the cold hates me and trust me when I say the feeling is mutual. It's the most cruel type of weather that ever existed and I'm not joking at all or being sarcastic, I really hate the cold I would so much rather be in the desert than here. Did I say that already?

Anyway I was stumbling to the kitchen where I knew there would at least be some soup, I mean Link has been running back and forth for the past couple of hours bringing back ingredients and all of that so I wouldn't be surprised if it was actually edible by human standards by now. Well, at least that's how it goes in the game and he kept running back and forth earlier when I was awake.

When I leaned against eh door and turned the knob I almost expected it not to move, how stupid is that? So with me spread out on the floor for anyone to step on me, I tried to get back up, but you know that didn't work out too well, because well I'm sort of like a turtle, you know can't really move and once I need to actually move it takes five years for me to move a ft. More like the King Zora guy from OoT. The point is I screwed myself over so now I can't get back up.

"HUMAN!"

"Whhhaaaaaaat." I whined into the stone flooring.

"WHY YOU ON FLOOR?!"

"I don't know. Why do you always have to yell when you speak?"

"I JUST HAVE LOUD VOICE."

"Yeah, sure. Well a little help would be nice. You know because this floor is so damn cold." He thumped over to me, yeah that's right thumped, not walk, but thumped. Which did NOT help my headache at all. God I want to die.

"DRINK SOUP!"

"Okay, sheesh try whispering please." My brain was pounding in my skull as he pulled me up over to a couple of boxes for me to sit down on. He then thumped right on over to the HUGE pot of soup, which was actually pretty cheesy, and I'm not one to like goat cheese but you know what, it was actually pretty good. I don't know what e put in there but my nasal cavity randomly cleared up and I was able to breathe through my nose again. I was still a little weak though, so if I wanted to move anywhere without falling over onto the floor again I would need a little help. "Thanks, where is your wife?"

"SHE SHOW LINK MIRROR!" Oh shit, not good.

"How long ago?"

_**Thud, thud, thud…**_

Well that can't be good.

"I think we should go check up on them, make sure they are both safe."

"GOOD IDEA HUMAN!" Why is it Link gets a name but I have to referred to as human? It's not fair I tell you. Then again I am the only human here so… I guess it kind of makes sense… Maybe, to me. Sort of.

* * *

"Why does it have to be so cold…" I mumbled as I grabbed onto Yeti as if my life depended on it, well at this point it kind of did, I mean unless I wanted to freeze to death and or get another cold (which I really don't want mostly because that would give our story a very boring and short ending.) plus the monsters were all coming at us. "Oh jeeze can you go any faster at all?!" I somewhat yelled over the howling wind. The wind suddenly stopped blowing and the ice bats flew away from the court yard area we suddenly were in. And of course there was a huge thud and screech you could hear from all the way out here. Before I knew it we were going probably faster than Epona… But no possible way as fast as Sheik, because as we all know sheik is the bomb and nothing will ever beat him.

Yeti smashed open the reinforced doors and threw us inside, dropped me on the hard floor and hey, what do you know, knock Link flat on his ass. Lovely sequence of events huh? I stumbled over to where Link was sitting, well more like crawled, and just dropped myself next to him.

"How was it?" I asked with a tired smirk.

"Cold very cold." I lifted my arm and patted him on his shoulder.

"I feel ya, let's go home now okay? Or at least to the village." I moved myself so my head ended up on his lap.

"Sure,"

"Now would be nice."

"Mhm."

"How about before I throw up because of the newlyweds being sickeningly sweet?"

"No I think Midna wants to torture you." I glared up at him wanting to cross my arms but I couldn't find the strength.

"She's a bitch,"

"She's not a dog in the slightest."

"You're a bitch too."

"Yeah now would be a good time to go back."

"Finally."


	27. a dash of jealousy part 1

Well I think it's fair to say I think God completely hates me, not because I'm still sick, but because I am stuck. Where am I stuck? Well between a rock and a hard place of course. Where else would I be stuck? Oh what is the hard place? Well it's more like a hard thing and his name just happens to be Link. Okay girlies before you get all excited about it it's that he just happened to fall on top of me… and just happened to land on my lips. It's happened before... Right? I mean it was a total and complete accident. Did not mean to do it at all. Right. He totally didn't slowly lean in, he viciously fell on me and we both had absolutely no clue what happened. Oh God this sucks. Maybe I should tell you guys about it from the beginning. It all started when we got back from the mountains of certain death…

* * *

"Well isn't this lovely." I said to Link riding on Sheik's back ( the horse not the person don't worry, you know it would probably be a really good idea to rename my horse something that isn't Sheik.) "I mean don't you just love this? It's so sunny and warm and not the mountains, where people keep thinking we're married."

"I seriously want to know why you keep freaking out every time someone says we're married. Just take it and move on."

"But it's so wrong," I whined while trying to shake the idea off. "I mean seriously how can you deal with it? Doesn't it bother you?" His face went red and he start coughing for some unknown reason. Maybe he was choking on his own spit or something.

"Not really," Oh yeah sure act all mature now but just wait till later, then you will most definitely be acting like a five year old on crack. "I mean we know it's not true so why does it matter?"

"Oh come on that can't be your reasoning." I moved around on Sheik's back a little trying to get my lower back to stop aching.

"Why not?"

"Because it's you! You're not this smart slash wise. Come on tell me the truth." He just kept silent and we kept on riding. "Well?"

"Well what?" I rolled my eyes and groaned. This guy really loves playing games with me doesn't he?

"Jackass." I kicked Sheik's sides and got him into a full gallop. I wasn't really all that angry at him, just frustrated, I mean you totally would be too if you were in position.

"HEY, ELLA! WAIT UP!" He yelled from behind me. I didn't pay attention to anything till I heard a squawk from above me. Not good.

"Shit," One of those bird dragon things were right above my head and I could reach my sword too easily. I know it's really stupid for someone who's riding across a country to not have a weapon within reach, but in my defense Link is usually right there next to me so he's the one who's always killing these things.

It became REALLY bad when I heard multiple hooves thumping against the ground and I saw a flaming arrow stick in the ground right next to me.

"Double shit!" I mumbled before the bird thing knocked me off, and let me tell you it hurt. I don't know if you've ever fallen off of a horse but it was bad enough to keep me on the ground for as long as I could stay there without getting trampled over, which in reality was ten to twenty seconds. Hey don't judge me.

God hates me as we all know, no not because I was now being chased by green pigs riding over grown brown pigs as well being attacked by a giant bird thing, but also because Sheik left me there… In the middle of the field… Alone. God I'm going to kill that horse if I don't die first. Hearing the twang of a bow I saw the bird thing just fall down next to me.

"Ella! Hold on!" I would have responded if it wasn't for the fact that I was too busy running for my stupid little pathetic life. I didn't have to hold on though because the coolest of all cool things happened. No I mean seriously this is beyond all the weird things that has happened to me.

There was a poof of smoke and a freakish burst of light and guess who was standing in front me, protecting me. Guess, come on guess! That's right the one the only Sheik (not my horse) was standing there in front of me one second and then the next second we were both on the rock cliff right outside of the village. How cool is that?! I was ninja'd! I know not exactly what should be the main thing that was on my mind, but hey it's me.

"Oh hey Sheik" I said once I could actually see. "You wouldn't happen to have my sword on you would you?"

"No,"

"Well that sucks." I said looking down at the little ants that were Link and the pig things running around the field. "Could you poof me down to my horse?"

"No, stay here." He couldn't poof me down to my horse and yet he can poof himself to battle field. Damn stalker. If he wasn't so amazingly awesome I would really be hating him right now. I mean come on he was treating me like a dog. Plus it's not like I could really go anywhere, because hey what do you know, Sheik dropped me off at the top of a cliff with absolutely no way down other than A) dying or B) teleporting. You know that really big cliff right outside of the village. Yeah that one. So here I am alone watching my two idiots fight.

I'm really hungry. I know it's random but it's the truth, I've been very hungry for the past couple hours and I've been looking forward to getting to the sanctuary for some food. I miss Luda's cooking too. And now I'm bored, and hungry, fantastic.

Looking over the edge back to the battle that was going on I saw that there were only two people left there and I'm assuming that they were Link and Sheik, because as we all know there's no way in hell that those little green pigs could ever kill My ninja or the idiot of the triforce.

"YO SHEIK, WANT TO GET ME DOWN FROM HERE?" I yelled waving my arms like a mad woman… Not that I am one or anything, it's just that I desperately wanted his attention and some food. Even though I yelled and was waving my arms around at them all they did was engage into a heated battle with swords and throwing stars. Lovely how they completely ignored me isn't it? "BOYS SERIOUSLY I'M REALLY HUNGRY UP HERE!" Yep, still too busy trying to kill each other. Guess I have to fend for myself.

Leaning over another edge I saw vines that went most of the way down to another level of rock, so being the idiotic dumb ass I am, I tried climbing down from there, only to have yet again failed. God I hate my life. Wondering why?

"JESUS CHRIST SHIEK HELP ME!" Because I put too much faith in the vine and not enough into stone. Yup that's right I ripped out a whole entire thing of vine and the stone was still about fifty feet below me. So I fall and I'm officially dead. You know what the worst part of this was. Sheik had just left me there literally hanging on one vine that was currently breaking. "Shit, shit, shit, shit." I shut my eyes tight and braced myself for impact. An impact that never came. "What the hell took you so long?!" I screeched smacking Sheiks amazingly sculpted chest.

"I was preoccupied." I rolled my eyes at him.

"Oh please it's just Link." He poofed us back down to the field and once he let go of me I was being squished by someone else. "Um… Is there a reason why you're hugging me?" Of course Link didn't say anything and just squished me even more. "Okay you can let go of me now." Seriously it's getting really hard to breathe.

Thankfully he let go of me and took a couple steps back. What I didn't get though was why he was glaring at Sheik.

"Ella, I think we should start heading for the village again."

"Okay?... We have a little problem though, my horse just happened to run off."

"That's not that much of a problem, we can both ride on Epona." I started laughing thinking he was joking.

"Oh wait your serious?" Don't get me wrong I'm not very afraid of Epona, it's just last time I was on her I needed to cling on to Link and I haven't ridden her since. Sure I never really needed to but still.

"Why wouldn't I be?"

"No reason." Cue the awkward silence……….

"Well we should get going,"

"Yeah," With that he went back a little ways to get Epona over here, or so I'm guessing because I most definitely did not follow him. I turned around to Sheik and his amazingly red eyes were glaring at Link's back. "Hey Sheik," His eyes turned to me and that soft look came back up into his eyes. I'm not going to lie but it still freaks me out a little bit. I know I said I've gotten used to it before, but I lied. There are just some things in this world you never actually get used to. Especially when he has mood swings like that. It's creepy I'm telling you creepy. "Thanks for saving me, multiple times."

He nodded his head in acknowledgement and then took a few steps back before he did his little ninja thing and disappeared.

"Why was he here?" I shrugged my shoulders at Link before reaching up to grab hold of the saddle.

"Who knows." Probably to make sure I don't get into any real trouble. "Probably because he thinks I'm his fiancée," Okay I really shouldn't have said that, because Link suddenly went emo after that. I'm not joking seriously, he wouldn't say anything for the rest of the time and when we were in the village he just got off of Epona and said he was going to see how Ilia was doing.

"Link's acting weird." Beth stated.

"You can say that again." We just stared off at the sanctuary door, almost as if we were expecting Link to come back out with a goofy smile on his face or something to tell us he was some how magically turned back to normal… Well at least his normal. This cannot be good.

* * *

**Well this is only part one of this part so bare with me a little, there might be three parts to this one little part I just didn't want to take five months to update again**


	28. and a pinch of alcohol part 2

**Hello my darlings :) I updated on time I hope all of ya'll are happy with this chapter, I had a whole bunch of fun writing it. **

* * *

Well this is just obnoxious, not going to lie, and the worst part is it's not just obnoxious; it's also very much immature. For once it's not my fault, its Link's, and I know I say that alot but it's true. I mean I did absolutely nothing wrong. He's just been pouting like a five year old over some stupid little thing. It's so miniscule that I don't even KNOW what the problem even is. You would think that he would be his usual rainbow sunshine self and all bowing down to Sheik for saving me. I mean if it were anyone else than he would be doing that.

"Maybe he's angry because I went ahead and was acting all immature."

"That seems reasonable." I rolled my eyes before going back to scrubbing the cloth with soap, which was not bubbling out of control this time just so you know. I'm very proud of my accomplishment. If you don't know what I'm talking about I'm referring to the time when I tried washing dishes and ended up covering the whole entire cooking area in suds. Back in the good ole days when Link wasn't that much of a pain in the ass. Unlike now. "I wonder…"

"Huh?" I turned to my head to Ilia who was also scrubbing the hell out of these clothes. Speaking of which, I wonder if Link ever changes his clothes. If he doesn't that's pretty nasty. I mean I can completely understand not changing for like a couple of weeks, but when he has three to four females doing laundry he might as well switch into something clean so we can clean his tunic, but then again I don't think he has any other clothes. On the other side he could always borrow something like I did…

"Maybe Link is jealous." I groaned at the impossible idea and rolled my eyes yet again for the millionth time within five seconds. I rang out my t shirt to get as much access water out as possible before I threw it into the separate bucket full of clothes that were being hung by Luda and Beth.

"Listen, Ilia darling, there is absolutely no way Link could be jealous of anything. And here's my reasoning. Reasoning Number one; absolutely nothing happened for jealousy to occur, reasoning number two; he's already in love with multiple someone's at this moment of time, and trust me when I say I'm not one of them. Reasoning number three, he maybe an idiot but I think that's it's a little more than obvious Sheik is just a friend." She had a very peculiar look on her face before she threw her white linen into the basket of clean cloth.

"Did he tell you this?" Uh, no, but its common knowledge that ever LOZ gamer knows. Ocarina of Time he falls for the Princess, Twilight Princess he falls for Midna; who is also a princess, and lastly there's you and as the world knows you're the mayor's daughter. He really has a thing for ladies with power. Of course this whole time I spent thinking that instead of saying out loud, so Ilia probably thinks I can't come up with any good come back. "My point exactly, so until he says it to you let's keep my theory open."

I picked up the next piece of cloth that needed washing, which just happens to be my bed sheet. Yeah the girls aren't going to be able to hang this one up without getting it dirty. I sifted through the pile and picked up something else, it was a rough brown material like most of the clothes I've been washing.

"I still say you're wrong."

"Yes but that's a step up from saying it's impossible." She had a small grin on her face as she started scrubbing the cloth against her washboard. I sighed before shaking my head not believing she actually said that.

"Sure." We kept working in silence until we heard the door to the hotel open, we paused our scraping off the dirt from the clothes to look at our intruder. "Oh it's you." I said before turning around back to the job at hand. I refuse to talk to him other than friendly greeting, completely refuse. Stupid jerk face.

"Ilia, would you mind washing my tunic?" Oh so he does get his clothes clean…

"Sure Link…" Believe it or not but Link actually didn't even think for a second before he started to strip. Yup that's right he stripped in front of two girls. I in all honesty don't care because I'm use to it and everything because of my four older brothers, but did he really have to do it to poor Ilia? Her face turned a dark red and covered her eyes before sticking her hand out to grab both the tunic and the white long sleeve shirt.

"Oh my god, Link you pervert! Don't you have at least a little bit of decency?! You don't just strip in front of girls like that!" I don't know why I suddenly got angry at him, but I felt as if yelling was very much needed. The worst part was that he didn't even turn back to look at me, he just kept walking towards the door and went 'feh' as if he didn't he didn't give a crap. "Since when did he turn into such a 'cool guy'?" That tool. He deserves to be smacked right across the face, and trust me I'm going to really enjoy it when I do smack him, hey what can I say? It's practically inevitable.

Ilia just shrugged her shoulders before she started to put Link's clothes in the bucket of the now murky water. The tool doesn't deserve to have nice and sweet Ilia do anything for him! What the hell is he thinking!

"Give me those." I grumbled as I ripped them out of her hands and I stomped outside after Link. Once he was in range I chucked them dripping wet at him, I stopped caring where it him as long as it did, that's all I cared about, luckily Din was on my side, that little trouble maker, and let them hit Link right in the back of the head so his tunic was dripping all over him. "I'VE HAD JUST ABOUT ENOUGH OF YOUR LITTLE BITCHY ATTITUDE LINK! YOU WANT CLEAN CLOTHES WASH THEM YOURSELF! BECAUSE ILIA IS NOT YOUR SLAVE AND I SURE AS HELL AM NOT WASHING ANYTHING YOU'VE TOUCHED!" I took a deep breath; apparently it transferred all my anger to my eyes from my voice, because I was glaring at him with all I had. "If you want to call in favors you better damn well deserve it, and don't even think about playing that I'm saving Hyrule card because that is bullshit."

Yeah that's right ladies, I just told Link off. I've been holding on to a short fuse lately, because of his stupid little immatureness that he's a brat. God I hate him. I didn't care for a response from him; I just turned around and stomped back into the hotel.

"Stupid Elf." I grumbled as I got back to my seat and started viciously scrubbing the dirty sheets in the soapy and murky water. "Stupid idiot Link."

* * *

"Okay Ilia I get it, I can walk to my room on my own." Apparently there's this thing going on up on death mountain. Some sort of celebration, which was never mentioned in the game nor was there any mention about needing to get dressed.

"I know you can walk there on your own, it's the part about you actually getting dressed in the dress Luda made for you that I doubt." You know sometimes I really wonder if this girl ever really lost her memory.

"How did you know I don't like dresses?"Just like the other 99.9999999999 percent of fan fiction people, but you know she never heard about them either…

"Because I haven't seen you ever wear one."

"Yes, but I never had time to wear one." I replied squinting at her suspicion clearly on m face.

"Well now you do. I'll help you put it on." I rolled my eyes AGAIN as I was dragged into my shared room with Beth.

"Okay I think I can put on a dress all by myself." She quirked an eyebrow at me as if she thought I just made a really stupid joke. Even though it was the only thing I could dress myself in when I was little because all you have to do is pull it over your head. When I saw the dress I started to have second thoughts… "Actually maybe I will need some help." It wasn't one of those things you just pull over your head, no of course not; it had to be a Japanese looking thing with the multiple ribbons and sashes. Hey at least it wasn't pink right?

* * *

"Okay, so what's the point of this party?" I asked Ilia as I walked down the cliffs holding on dearly to the skirt of my new dress.

"I don't really know, Luda didn't really tell me." Oh well that's helpful. Ilia was doing a much better job of holding on to the bottom of her dress and keeping it from getting dirty than I was. Seriously mine is going to be ruined by the end of the night.

Okay now the moment of truth, I had to jump down a mini cliff while not ripping my dress. Fantastic. I hopped down only to lose my balance as I hit the ground and I fell back wards into dirt.

"Great, just freaking great." Everyone was out here and eating and laughing and drinking some type of clear liquid. A clear liquid that I had a very strange feeling was not water. My theory was confirmed when Kehoe came over to us with the liquid in his glass and started to swagger around with his face bright red as if he was constantly blushing.

"Hello beautiful," He slurred putting his arm around me and breathing on me too. The scent of alcohol on his breath nearly made me gag.

"Kehoe what the hell are you drinking?" I asked as I tried to shrug away from him. He looked at the glass that was in his hand then back at me as if I asked him what the meaning of life was.

"I don't know… " His cheeks were still flushed and then he had that weird grin on his face again. "But it's good stuff." I quirked my eyebrow at him before leaning away from him still trying to get away, but no avail.

"How many did you have?" We started walking into the mob of Gorons that were holding rock mugs instead of shot glasses. He held three fingers up to me.

"Two. No more than four I swear." He slurred to me.

"I think you had enough." I said trying to grab it out of his hand. He just kept it at arms length from me. He whined no like a little child or like me if you were trying to take my chocolate away. With a leap I finally got it even though most of it was spilt all over the ground, then I shot the rest of it down like whiskey. I learned from my oldest brother. He's skilled in the ways of getting drunk. "There, no more." He started sulking and sat in a corner I dubbed as tonight's corner of woe.

That stuff was pretty strong though, it made the back of my throat burn to the point of nearly coughing.

"You shouldn't have any more than that." A voice said. A very smexy voice I might add.

"Hello Sheik darling." I said to him. I grinned when I saw that his mask was up and he seemed completely normal. "I think we have an alcoholic on our hands." I told him pointing at Kehoe who was still crying over me drinking his liquor. I hugged him and my face started to heat up. "Okay well bye bye now." I waved and got lost in the crowed.

* * *

Three hours a lost sandal and three shots of that drink later and I started heading back to the village on my own. Completely not the best idea but hey at the time I was just a wee bit tipsy. What are talking about?! That's totally offending how dare you suggest that I was completely wasted?! Talk about rude, just because I nearly fell off of two cliffs does not mean I was drunk.

"I'VE GOT A LOVERLY BUNCH OF COCONUTS DEEDLEE DEE FOUND THEM ALL BOUNCING IN THE ROAD!" Okay so maybe I was a little drunk. "Pshhhhhhhh, wooosh I'm an air plane!" And I think that's when I got the brilliant idea of jumping off of the last cliff. Luckily for me it was a soft landing, unluckily for Link however a lovely young lady decided to pretend she was Peter Pan. " 'Ello governa." I giggled before rolling off of Link.

We both got up and it was actually a really nice walk to the village. Of course it consisted of me dancing and skipping and screaming at the top of my lungs that I needed to see the wizard of Oz. "Or Gandalf, he works too." I stated as I walked over to the spring.

"Elenya…"

"Yes my Elf-Boy." I looked over to Link who was doing only god knows what the whole time I was making a fool out of myself. I took my other sandal off and stepped into the water, letting the hem of my brand new fancy dress get wet. The water made it look navy blue, it was actually better looking wet, and that's when I decided to go swimming. When I got out of the water I realized I was all wet and so that's what brings me to this…

I went over to the sanctuary, next to where Link was and I was going to turn the knob to the door and right then Link grabbed my wrist.

"Oh yeah you wanted something didn't you?" It wasn't till then I noticed Link's face was nearly as flushed as mine and probably the passed out Kehoe I abandoned with the Gorons. It didn't even regester that his face was coming closer to mine or that his eyes were starting to close. And within the blink of an eye ( I know because I myself blinked when this happened) Link had me here, pinned against the outside of the sanctuary and in a very onesided drunken lip lock. "Hmm…" Well This is tricky. How exactly am I supposed to get out of this little pickle.

Thankfully Gravity only likes me drunk and had Link fall over in a drunken stupor. Well that fixes that problem… He looks like he's passed out so the question was to leave him there or to not leave him there. Of course I was sleepy as well and I just stepped on him walking over to the hotel to get to bed. My answer to that question it might just be obvious, to leave him.

* * *

**Well there we are, all lovely and done and a weeeeeeeeeee bit foreshadowing, I didn't realize I could use terms like that on this :) Next chapter is back to the real plot so be prepared to face giant spiders moving statues and a very much hung over Link. :D**

**Please Review!**


	29. Really important AN Sorry

Authors Notes again

Sorry my people Finals are coming up and I'm trying to focus on those but don't you worry so far the next chapter is going to be nice and long and beautiful and not boring or an other filler. So please be patient, at the rate it's going it's going to be longer than my really long chapter that I typed when Mickey was with the Gorons (yeah I know that was a realllllllly long time ago but it might just beat that one.) So have faith please.

Yours Truly

~ThePersonWithTheVeryLongName AKA Emma


	30. This is why I HATE Magic

**OMG IT'S BEEN OVER A YEAR SINCE THIS STORY WAS STARTED! Thank you all of you I can't believe I actually got it going this far, nearly 200 reviews too! This isn't all of it but I thought since I was late for the special occasion I might as well update now, thank you my loverly reviewers your my life, and thanks for reading this, really. I apprieciate it. (Too bad I can't spell. If I could this would feel a lot less of a joke) But thank you really :)**

* * *

"Ow…" I opened my eyes only to automatically shut them again and stuck my head underneath my blankets and sheets to try to block the sun from not just burning holes into my eyes but through my eyelids as well. The vibrations of the floor creaking sent my brain pounding, and I could feel liquid crawling up and burning the back of my throat. Needless to say I did not want to wake up.

"I told you not to drink anymore." A freakishly loud voice said from next to my makeshift cocoon.

"Do you have to yell?" I grumbled daring to open my eyes keeping my head under the covers to dim the damn light. The floor creaked again as the person next to me squatted down to be a little bit more level. The only way he was really going to be level with me was if he were to lay down next to me on the floor, but I highly doubt he would actually do that. His shadow moved over my blankets as he got comfortable. "Is there a reason why you're here other than to watch me suffer?" I asked him fighting my nausea.

"I came to-"

"Why are you yelling?" My voice as quiet as it was cracked and made me sound like a boy going through puberty. He tried again this time in a softer voice very close to a whisper.

"I came to see how you were fairing." I peeked out from underneath my covers as if I were to slowly adjust to the light and make me feel better, or at least good enough to be able to stand on my own two feet.

"Well I was fine, until you freaking woke me up." Stupid ninja. I thought they were supposed to be silent?

"I am sorry." My eyelids felt heavy and I welcomed the thought of sleep. Trust me with a hang over this bad you would too.

"Yeah yeah just go away already will ya? I wanna go to sleep." He didn't leave, but of course he wouldn't just let me stay in bed either, no he's too cruel to let me live out the rest of this curse called a hangover in beautiful peace. Damn Ninja.

"You are to leave soon, to go to the Sacred Grove." I rolled over on to my side so I wouldn't be facing the moron.

"No shit Sherlock." I mumbled before completely giving up all hopes of ever going back to sleep. I slowly bring my head up from underneath the blankets and peek over at him, my eyes started silently screaming at me in protest, but he was right I have a bitchy elf to deal with. God can only hope that his hangover is worse than mine. The jerk deserves it.

I twisted out of my massive pile of sheets and one pillow and started crawling towards the door.

"Is there a reason why you can't stand up?" I rolled my eyes at him even though he obviously wasn't facing me.

"Did you realize that's the first time you've used a contraction (AN I'm in standard English class so my teacher just keeps us reading books but doesn't teach us grammar so I'm not too sure if that's the right term because I haven't heard it being used since the beginning of last year and I just used the internet dictionary so please tell me if it's right or not)?" I retorted not really wanting to answer. I was in a really bad mood, and he wasn't making it any better. "Besides, if I crawl I won't puke everything up." I said feeling the bile rise in my throat again. "Even though I'm starting to think that puking would make me feel better…" I mumbled. "It would be very messy though…" I turned my head and saw Beth sleeping in her bed still taking deep steady breaths. Man, why can't I be the one still sleeping?

I slowly made my way to the door and once there I stood slanted on my knees to push it open. I gagged a little on my way down to the lobby, and right when I was at the front door I made one gulp to try to make sure I didn't throw up… At least inside. Once I made it to the porch and I stopped trying to keep it down and let the chunks fly.

Too bad for Link he was standing right where I was puking. Hehe, my bad. When I looked up wiping my mouth with my arm I saw Link looked just fine, no hang over or anything. Sometimes I really hate him. Like I really, really hate him. For instance right now. He probably thought that I was glaring at him because I naturally start glaring at people even though I'm not necessarily glaring at them, my eyes just go really squinty, that plus I myself barely able to see through the slits just made it seem twenty times worse. Sure I was actually angry at him this time, but it's not like I would have actually glared at him, I'm quite happy barfing on him. I gave myself not so much secret pleasure by doing that.

"You might want to change before we leave." I said holding in a chuckle. I looked over at Sheik and saw him smirking. If it made him smirk than it must have been funny. I thought so. A little embarrassing on my half yes, but funny none the less.

I turned around feeling much better once Link left and that my stomach was no longer filled bile and all those things that are poisonous, honestly I think it's safe to say I completely damaged my liver to the point of no return, but that's not my point. I sat down on the porch in front of Sheik feeling so much better, but I really could go for some super pain killers.

"So when are you going to do that whole ninja thing and go poof? Because Link and I are going to be leaving soon, and you probably have some Zelda stalking to do." My big goofy smile must have looked really odd on my face with my icky unbrushed teeth and blood shot eyes and of course my favorite overly messy hair with just a dash of uncontrollable glaring. I must have looked like a mad woman.

"Soon, but I will be following you to make sure you don't get hurt." I rolled my eyes at him before throwing all my weight on my arms.

"Look Link will be there right? I'll be fine, don't worry about me, plus I'm tough, it's not like I'm completely hopeless. Go protect the princess, she probably needs you more than I will," I turned my head to mumble, "God knows she can't not get captured once." When I said this I completely forgot she died, sorry. I'm just thankful that Midna wasn't around to hear that. Sheik must have heard because he chuckled right when I finished. He kneeled down next to me and pulled down his little scarf and put his hand on my cheek. It wasn't till he started to lean in till I realized what was going on, and by then it was too late. Yet again, I was kissed. Sadly, I wasn't saved by gravity and alcohol this time, no this time I was completely on my own. He pulled back and grinned, and I was tense and stiff as a board my face felt hot and I didn't even process what just happened.

"How are you supposed to take care of yourself if you can't even defend yourself against me?" I mumbled at me before disappearing. By the time I got my brains working again to yell at him he was gone.

"SHEIK YOU MORON!" I yelled just in case he was still around to see what my reaction was. Well I should go get ready…

I was now changed, along with Link, and we were all set for squishing bugs. Minus that club rod thing that we need, but you know that comes after. So now we are riding our horses south. This led me to a very good question.

"Why can't we just teleport over there?" I asked Midna looking at Link's shadow.

"Because." I groaned and rolled my eyes.

"Great answer," I grumbled.

"Why do you want to get there so quickly? Miss your boyfriend?" I felt my face get really hot and right when I was going to defend myself, of course that's when I heard a firecracker and saw a flash. I automatically knew Sheik showed up. "Speak of the Devil."

"Elenya," He spoke nodding his head at me in acknowledgement I guess.

"Can I help you?" I asked him trying to pretend to not be effected by what he did that morning only to feel my face get hotter by the second. All the while Link was grumbling something that sounded very much like why's he so special, but as that makes absolutely no sense as to why he would say that so I'm guessing I heard wrong. "You know usually when someone is stalking someone else they usually try NOT to be noticed."

He didn't see the humor of what I said and Link has yet to grow up so no one was chuckling or acting happy, I was all alone in the world. Wow emo moment, but you know it kind of was true. Sheik just walked over to my horse (Who I have yet to rename, I really have to do that sometime) and climbed up behind me.

"Uh, what are you doing?" I asked feeling him sit right behind me, with literally no space between my back and his front, and he snatched the reigns from my hands and kicked my poor little horsy to get him into a gallop.

"I am coming with you," He stated simply. When he got my horse directly next t Epona I could practically feel murderous vibes radiating from the two guys. Honestly I don't know what's wrong with them but can't they just save it for when we get there?

"Is there any specific reason why you're not following us in the shadows anymore?" The movement of my nameless horse caused my head to bang off of his shoulder, which by the way, very much like Link's was amazingly bony. It hurt. No lie and this just keep happening over and over again.

"I do not see any reason not to be with my fiancée." I rolled my eyes at him and tried to scoot away but the shape of the saddle only made me slide back so I was squished against him again. You know what it's bad enough having one person constantly being accused of being your lover and or husband, but now I'm just going to go through hell aren't I?

"Ugh, I give up!" I sighed throwing my hands up in the air, and for a day I really did give up, it was just like that time, at the place way back when Srej wasn't knocked up. You know that mountain place with the gorons. God that was hell.

The rest of the way down was pretty boring nothing big happened Link was being his new pissy self, and I was doing a great job of ignoring him and holding a conversation with Sheik, which for some reason got him even angrier. I think he's pmsing and really needs some chocolate. Sucks to be him, that's what he gets for not having a hangover, which reminds me.

"Why did you kiss me last night?" I asked Link. He nearly fell off Epona and I nearly started laughing. Nearly, I would have if it weren't for the fact that he caught himself before he completely fell off.

"I didn't kiss you." I gave him a dead panned look as we continued on, but I didn't press the subject and he most definitely wasn't going to actually respond to my expression so we just kept our horses going.

We arrived at the forest around noon, don't ask me why it took us so long because honestly I really don't know, I didn't even know it was noon either; it was what's his face that you rarely ever see who said it. Well anyway I don't know if he was telling the truth or not, or even how the hell he could have known what time it was considering how you see the sun considering how it was blocked by a million trees. Yup, that's right; I forgot he's ninja so he wouldn't need to be worried about trees. Damn Bastard. That's his new name from me, Damn Bastard, just like Link is Jack Ass. Aren't they just lovely?

So anyway, into the deep forest of Forestness we go, last time I went in there it was because I was dragged by Link to go save the kiddo from ferocious purple monkeys. I think that was all the way back in like chapter 4, it's freaky ho w long I've been here. Which reminds me, when all this happens what will happen? Like will I be able to go back home? I hope I do, that would be awful if I couldn't.

Sheik dragged me out of my thoughts when he viciously ripped me off of my nameless horse, I know I've mentioned that he's nameless like million times, but you know I really want him to have a name and I feel bad because he doesn't have one so maybe his name will be 'Nameless'?

Link went into the cavern of creepers first and then Sheik followed him and I followed Sheik, so we were in like this little line going through the cave thing. Psh, I wasn't scared what are you talking about, I wasn't scared at all, in fact it was Sheik that was scared, know how I could tell? He kept grabbing for his darts every five seconds. He might like scream like a five year old on helium, but it makes me feel better to know I wasn't the only one that was scared out of their minds.

"Sheik, since it's obvious we both don't want to be here why don't you just teleport us to the forest temple?" I asked as he tensed for the millionth time with in the past five seconds because he heard squeaking. You know I find it slightly hilarious how two people who can kill giant monsters are afraid of mice and man eating plants.

"I cannot," I mumbled at his answer and of course under my breath and this time he didn't hear me and my craziness of anger at the fact that I actually have to go through the little poison somewhat of a clearing.

"Why are you going back into not using contractions, you know it's not impossible for you to say words like can't right? You did it just the other day."

He never answered me back and we finally got to the little poison lake mist pool thing. I really don't know what I should call it considering it never really goes away, and it is in no way natural. Where's Link?

"Um, why are we missing someone?" I looked around and still saw no Link, just me and mister ninja. Seriously there was no wolf or anything, if he teleported I'll be pissed.

"I do not know,"

"Okay dude, really stop talking like that it's driving me absolutely nuts. You a god damn contraction or something, I know you can you did it earlier today." Hey, don't look at me like that, I was grumpy especially angry at stupid Elf-Boy because he wasn't around and I really wanted to teleport and just get this over with, but no, he had to leave me behind and THEN disappear and leave me alone with what's his face. Great, just great. That's like leaving cake in front of a fat kid, just wrong and something is going to go horribly wrong.

The rest of the way was in done in silence and I found something out, amazingly I can't believe I didn't realize this before, but when Sheik teleports he only goes short distances, and most of the teleporting is just ninja skill. Honestly I thought it was a little disappointing, but that's life for ya.

When we finally got there, I saw Link talking to Rusle, oh and by the way, it took freaking for ever to get there, yeah not nice simple and quick no, because God (or Din whoever is in control over here) just loves seeing me miserable, so Sheik took his god damn time getting out of there and ended up needing to kill every single monster and or animal that was around because they are all 'evil'. Sometimes I really hate my life.

Once Link turned around and saw us he took the golden chicken, (yes it was in fact golden like in the game and looked like it would in fact fall faster than me if we dropped off the cliff at the same time. Link being the weirdo he is, (and a Jackass) didn't even bother to look in our direction again and just jumped off the cliff holding on to the damn bird. Okay just letting you know right now that I have no clue how he could ever possibly put so much trust into a damn bird. Not just any bird, a bird that looks like it can't even fly when it's trying to carry its OWN weight never mind someone else's. He's crazy man.

Once I saw Link I sprinted towards him to give him a piece of my mind, but you know God was against that too, and so he was able to jump off the cliff WAY before I even got near him, bastard. Of course I have absolutely no body control and ended up running into the ledge like railing of the tree root. I leaned forward to see Link gliding gracefully with the chicken in his hands.

"GOD DAMN YOU LINK!" I screamed after him. Rusle obviously thought it was funny I could tell by his chuckle, his completely unneeded chuckle. I was not happy at all.

"I see you two are getting along as always," He laughed before walking away. Well he started walking away anyway, he stopped as he got about two to three meters away from me and called out to me, I too busy swearing and cussing at Link who was no longer around to even hear it, but when did that ever stop me?

"YOU STUPID ELF! WHY THE HELL DID YOU EVEN BRING ME ALONG IF YOU WERE JUST GOING TO DITCH ME HALF WAY THERE, YOU IDIOT! I COULD BE SLEEPING IN MY COMFY BED BUT NOOOOO YOU HAD TO BE THE JACK ASS YOU ARE AND MAKE ME GET OUT OF BED WITH A GOD DAMN HANG OVER AND GO ALL THE WAY DOWN SOUTH TO THE DAMN FOREST WHERE THERE'S PURPLE MONKEYS TRYING TO EAT ME AND *$%#$& BUGS TRYING TO SUCK ALL MY BLOOD OUT!" I took a breath and man there's no one and nothing to stop me. "I DON'T KNOW WHY YOU'RE SO %^#$%* MAD BUT GET THE HELL OVER IT!" When I finished I was panting and at one point even punched the wooden root wall, of course that only helped with hurting my hand, so now let's have a mini review shall we, I have a migraine from the hangover, bug bites all over me from going through the forest, and now I have god damn bleeding knuckles, isn't that just great.

"Did something happen, Elenya?" Rusle called from where he was.

"Yeah Link finally hit puberty and now she wants to complain about getting her period every five seconds." I growled glaring at the place where he used to be about five minutes ago. Rusle obviously didn't understand what I was talking about, I don't think he even knew what a period was, poor man. He's probably better off not knowing.

Sheik stalked (because you know he's a stalker it's what he does) up to me and seemed to be watching the forest, or analyzing something, and trust me when I say he gets very creepy in his terminator mode. Oh, by the way if you've ever seen the second terminator movie then you'll know what I'm talking about because he gets the same look as the liquid terminator. Very creepy.

"So, you've got any plan how to get to the secret grove, because that jackass ditched us." I grumbled quite angrily. Sheik didn't say anything just put his left arm around me and through the firecracker at the ground with the other arm. If any of you remember, in the game there's that huge swinging hammer, and let me just tell you right now, Sheik's timing sucks ass. Yup that's right; he nearly got us knocked off… All three times. I myself completely forgot that there was even a set of swinging hammers, of course I don't think that there were that many, but still…

"Greaaaaaat, perfect, now how the hell am I supposed to get in there?..." We arrived at the sacred grove which by the by is beautiful, but now I had myself a wee problem, every time I walked through the stone doors I just ended up on the other side of the ruins. This was very much a 'what the fuck?' moment. I know God hates me but really? Couldn't he just give me a break for once? I mean I don't even know what you're supposed to do in the game at this point. I completely forget.

"Maybe an ancient artifact is needed." I sat down at the edge of the door way to the temple of time, and start to bang my head against it.

"Now only if we had one." I always laughed at this part of Lord of the Rings when they couldn't get the doors open, but now I seriously feel for them. At least they had more of a clue how to open this than I did. And that's when I had a spur of the moment stroke of inspiration. "Melon!" I said pointing at the door almost expecting it to open for me. Even though I knew that it wouldn't happen, why? Because God hates me.

"I do not think a fruit could be considered an ancient artifact Elenya." I glared at him.

"No shit Sherlock." Birds chirped and bugs croaked almost as if they were laughing at me. "Please give me a sign! Anything!" So I can go find Link and kick his scrawny little Elvish ass. Right then and there a raven flew down in front of me and started to hop towards the door. "Go away you stupid bir- OH I GET IT! THANK YOU DIETY PERSON!" I yelled to the sky waving my hand like a mad woman. Sheik looked at me like he was so amazingly confused, which he probably was. "Sheik you know that necklace your always carrying around ?" Seriously he treats it like he's Golem and it's The Ring. Wow a lot of LOTR references today. He nodded and took it out, from where I have no clue considering how he's wearing a skin tight jumpsuit thing. I pried it from his greedy sexy fingers (hey I may get annoyed by the guy but I still think he's hot give a chic a break) and put it towards the door, and of course with my luck… Nothing happened.

I groaned ready to throw the necklace at the ground but before I could Sheik grabbed my wrist right when I was about to let go of it.

"Perhaps you are supposed to wear it." And I didn't think of that because?...

"Hold on you just want me to marry you, just letting you know I am NOT falling for that."

"Do you wish to enter?"

"Yes."

"Do you wish to help Link?"

"Debatable."

"If you put it on you'll be able to go through, so just put it on and I'll follow." I did as I was told, not because I was told to, but because he had a very good point and I really wanted to knock Link onto his ass. Teach him a lesson.

I put on the necklace and something good actually happened, I guess. Once I put it on it floated a little bit then the doors opened. I yelled sweet before running through the doors, I was so happy I finally got in. I was about to jump on Sheik for being the know it all that he is, but when I turned around there was a problem…

"Oh Shit. Where'd Sheik go?"

* * *

**Guys don't worry, I'll have the second half soon, I just have to remember what it was like going throught the temple of time so I can write about it hehehe well anywhoooooooo... Stay tuned for the next chapter. And if you guys know of any good walkthroughs that I could use that would be great. LOVE YOU-Emma**


	31. Spiders, Ticks and other creepy things

**It's been a long time since I updated this, or anything on fanfiction for that matter, so I hope you like this next chapter even though it's extremely short, buit know that I've been wroking on the sequal to this story, oh yes there is going to be another one and trust me when I say it's SO much muchier.**

* * *

"Shitake mushrooms! Where did Sheik go?" I thought out loud, no not only did I have that stupid idiotic little necklace that means that I accepted him as my fiancée (insert groan here) but now I'm stuck in a temple, where time can't touch it and I can't find that Damned Elf boy, and where the hell is that creepy singing coming from? There's no one but me here!

My shoes clicked against the ivory flooring and as awesome as this may be from a fan point of view, I can't help but get freaked out by how stuck I am. You may ask 'Why don't you just try to open up the doors again Mickey?' but I already tried that and they won't open for me. So, yeah, I'm stuck here in the only hole in the space time continuum in the world, I'm simply amazing. Walking down the stairs and nearly falling down the last five steps, key word there being nearly, I began to be increasingly freaked out by the sound of deep voices singing into my ear when no one is around, and the echoing of my on footsteps. I actually stopped walking a few times to see if I could hear anyone walking around.

When I reached the back room where Link would have had to create the stair case by stabbing the Master Sword back into the mantle, I felt hopeless, not going to lie, I started to cry a little. Okay don't look at me like that, if you felt like you were going to stay in a place with no bathroom, no food and no possible way to change the background music you would start crying too. Of course when someone starts to panic, they don't think rationally, so when I started to panic and start crying I ran straight towards where the stairs should be. I've always had this theory that you had to have the master sword to go up those stairs, or some type of ancient magic. Because the stairs always disappear when ever Link walks away from it in the game and Ooccoo can go up the stairs all she wants. So when I started running strait for that wall with the stair case I NEVER in my life expected it to actually light up for me. Then again, I was wearing that damned promise necklace. Figures.

As I climbed up the stairs, stairs that made me almost want to cry because I never knew when I would be falling to my death from lack of magical abilities, the background voices that sang the oh so legendary song of time started to die down and a whole new type of music was created. I don't know what it came from but it started freaking me out, more so than the deep hollow voices from the main sanctuary. It didn't cross my mind that once I actually got into the sanctuary that I would need any equipment, no, of course not, because I'm too stupid to think anything through.

It wasn't till I was in the front of the shut door that I realized he wasn't even half way through yet, I mean he obviously wouldn't be, it hasn't been that long since he could have came into the time warp time zone. So, my game plan entertain myself until Link the jack ass of Hyrule, comes back to proceed with the second half of the temple.

I looked around the room to find something that could possibly enterain me, that's when my eyes landed on a large group of pots and bowls that were just calling my name sitting there harmlessly in the corner.

"Oh this is going to be fun,"

* * *

"Elenya, what in the world are you doing?" Oh, well Link's back, and the door is unlocked, cool. What used to be a sea of ceramic pots and bowls is now a house, or miniature building made by yours truly.

"What can I say? I was bored waiting for your royal highness to get back. What took you so long?" I was putting finishing touches on the wall facing the door that lead to the second half of the temple. He didn't answer me back, just sort of glared at me.

"Did pretty boy give that necklace to you as an engagement present?" I looked down at the charm and back at Link, then back at my charm.

"Yes and no. He gave it to me so I could go and kick your ass for ditching us in the middle of Hyrule field. Which by the way, was a really douchey thing to do." He walked over to the giant door took the rod and swung it down, which just so you know made the giant statue behind him slam the ground with a giant hammer. "Why did you do that?" He kept doing it till he was red in the face. "Link stop you look like a moron." Still kept swinging it. "God Link what is the poi-"

The sound of pottery clanging together stopped me from speaking, it sounded like a miniature earthquake or something like that. Turning around I saw a bowl slide down the top of the roof. That's when Link being the ass that he is shot a wall with a bomb arrow, I barely had enough time to connect what was happening and run away.

"WHAT THE HELL LINK? ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL ME?" He didn't even deny it. He just went to the giant door and kept on walking. Damn him. "I swear I'm going to kill that, stupid, blond, moronic, arrogant little elf."

After chasing him down again, we got to the boss. I'm not going to tell you about all that boring stuff that happened between me nearly being killed by a house of pots and bowls.

* * *

"You know I've got this really weird feeling." I announced while just staring at the door.

"Like what?" Finally I've got Link's attention, he's been ignoring me the whole time, being that overly emotional screw ball that he is.

"Like there's going to be something very icky on the other side of this door." He just shrugged and got the door to move. When we stepped in I was almost amazed at how beautiful the giant bug squishing statues were. In the game they seemed a bit plain, just like all the other statues outside of this room, but these statues had carvings all over them, almost like they were charms carved into the skin of the statues to make them be able to move. And of course there's always that one little thing to just make everything look amazingly gross. "You've got to be kidding me…" We both looked up and saw that annoyingly huge spider staring down at us with it's one eye. "I'll distract it you hit it."

I shot at it with Link's bow and missed horribly. The pull back was so much harder than mine and so I had to put more concentration on pulling the string instead of accuracy, but it did its job in getting the bugs attention. Once I saw that red-yellow eye stare down at me I had a very good feeling it would be a good time to run, and so that's what I did, I ran.

"Shoot the eye!" I yelled as I blindly threw his bow towards the spot I believed he was in.

"With what?"

"Well, I would imagine your bloody bow would be a bloody good idea!" Trying not to get touched by the lazer that was shooting out of it I dove into the middle of the floor. "When the eye is open shoot it with your bow, then use the statues to kill it!" I looked over my shoulder and saw the spider staring at me again. "Shit." I scurried back up onto my feet and started sprinting again. "NOW WOULD BE GREAT!" I screamed. I heard a shriek come from the ceiling and I looked for the beams of light that would tell us which statue it was at and would crawl down. "Give me the Dominion rod."

"Why-"

"JUST DO IT!" He tossed me the rod and I swung at the statue that would be my weapon of choice. See the problem with Link doing it would be he would give it a fair chance and probably kill me in the process . So I did the most American thing I could possibly do, I beat it to the ground before it even had a chance. "DIE! YOU! STUPID! BUG!" I wasn't satisfied until the leg stopped twitching. "There, now we can go home." Link looked at me strangely horrified, I quite liked it.

"Uh, Elli, we're not quite down yet." He said will point at the corpse. There were little white ticks popping out of the skin and the eye was in the middle of them, it was running around its black legs scurrying around on the floor.

"Can you please take care of it? I'm tired." He took out the Master Sword nodding, taking his heroic stance. "Dude just shoot it." He looked at me confused and the fierce look was automatically gone. "Trust me, it's easier and we'll get out of here sooner." Once the eye died all the other ones ran away, crawling up the walls. "Told ya."

Midna coming out of no-where again, made a portal in the middle of the floor. Her hair beckoning us to come to her so we can leave. Before we dissolved into nothingness Midna turned to me looking at me suspiciously.

"How is it you know how to kill the bad ones so quickly?" I just shrugged and said,

"I'm just smart I guess."


	32. Hyliuan Toture Device Take 2

**Chapter 32: Hylian Torture Device Take 2**

"TIME! BEAUTIFUL MOVING TIME! OH HOW I MISSED YOU!" I started to nuzzle my face against the closest tree trunk to the front entry way lovingly. "Hey, Link you hear that?" I said as I stopped nuzzling the tree.

"No… I don't hear anything other than birds chirping." I flung myself from the tree on to him.

"EXACTLY! There's no creepy background music! No old guys singing, no weird clicking sounds. Just pure beautiful sounds of not music!" I backed away from him and just lay down on the grass and stared at the sky, the sun went down and the full moon was staring us down. "How long were we in there for?"

"About twelve hours." Sheik's voice came out of nowhere. I lifted my head off of the grass to look at him, and then just as I had done before with Link, I jumped him.

"!" See what I meant to say was 'oh my god I missed you so much', but you know, I was so happy to be out of that evil place that I said it all in one breath… Maybe I was just a little too happy… Of course Link picked this exact moment to be all emo again. I swear to God he'd pregnant. "Okay, so what's next on our agenda?" I hope to the sweet lord that it's sleep because I'm pooped.

"Next we have to go back to the village and get any clues of where the next mirror shard will be." Midna said not even bothering to pop out from Link's shadow. Silly little Sheik got all scared and started to take out his daggers and all his other pointy objects.

"Breathe, it's just Midna. It's not like she's going to hurt you or anything… Maybe, on purpose… Well she might try to hurt you, but she won't try to kill us and hand everything over to the bad guy." Great job Mickey, great job, very reassuring. "Besides, she's just a bitch with superpowers."

I could feel the glare Midna wanted to send my way on my back as I lead the way out of the grove and into the forest. It was at that specific point where Link had to leave us and go on his own. I wrapped my arms around Sheik's neck (don't get too excited now you fan girls) and let him use his awesome ninja skills. Once we got to the other side of the grove I walked over to my horse, and first let Sheik get on then had him pull me up.

* * *

Don't ask me where Link went, my guess is that he probably already teleported to the village, but it was a pleasant ride back, well it was for me anyway. Sheik probably got tired of me sleeping on him, it was hard to accomplish at first, but with a little bit of practice, anything is possible. Even sleeping on someone's extremely boney shoulder, of course it goes without saying that every time he had me horse jump my head would violently bounce off his shoulder.

"MOTHER FATHER!" I screamed nearly falling off because of the sudden banging my head had colliding with Sheik's shoulder. I suddenly grabbed at whatever I could find to regain my balance, of course that just happened to be Sheik. More specifically that would be his knees.

"Are you alright?" I held the back of my head and softly kneaded it with my fingers.

"I'm fine. Just don't do that again… How much longer till we get there?"

"Not too long." I sighed a nice long heavy sigh that made me feel lighter.

"Can we take a detour?"

"All depends on if it is important enough and where you wish to go." I searched out for the yellow light surrounding the new and improved castle, debating whether or not I should even bother asking.

"Anywhere I guess, I just don't want to go to the village." I felt him shift behind me as if he were thinking that it had something to do with him.

"Did something happen between you and Link?" Shaking my head I gazed towards the castle.

"I don't know why he's being such a jerk. I didn't even do anything, right?" Leaning back into his chest and laying my head on his shoulder, I don't know why I keep doing that even when I know that his shoulder could cause me a concussion. I let another sigh go before looking at him. "Mind if we go to Castle Town? Just you and me? I really don't feel like going back to the village at all."

He just nodded but we kept going towards the village. My plan was horribly planned out, mostly because I forgot to realize that in order to get to the market you have to go through the village and enter through the east. Of course there's always that other way of entering from the west, but that would take at least a one day's ride and I think it's fair to say that Sheik needs a break. Even though he was sitting around literally doing nothing for about twelve hours.

"Do you know what the date is?"

"No…"

"So you know how long I've been here for?"

"I would believe your presence became known to us around six months ago." I Turned around and gave him the most suspicious look I could muster. "What do you mean 'us'?"

"The sheikah,"

"But aren't you the last- You know what, I have this feeling in my gut that I really shouldn't ask." I turned back around and just looked forward. We stayed silent for the rest of the ride. The only thing that went between us was a large amount of sighs.

* * *

"Elli, you look really pretty."

"Thanks I guess… Personally I feel like an over grown rag doll." I just finished taking a bath and now that I was clean I changed into a yukata type of thing. Luda gave it to me once I stepped into the village; apparently I reeked so horribly she could smell me from miles away and already got everything ready for when I took my bath. The pattern on it wasn't very epic, it actually very simple, but the fact that I was wearing something the Japanese would usually wear on a special occasion made me feel out of place. Besides it was technically dress. The color of the yukata was actually a nice light purple, almost lavender with the occasional dark purple or blue flower. All in all it was very pretty in that simply small town type of way.

"I think you look wonderful." Ilia stated from the corner of the room where she was folding laundry.

"I don't see why you people enjoy dressing me up so much."

"It's usually because the look on your face is priceless." Ah, and there's the knocked up Srej.

"Yeah, I kind of figured you to be the sadistic type." She glared at me and took out white face cream, from the cabinet next to her. "Don't even think about it. You already put me in something really pretty that I'm probably going to rip, I refuse to look like a clown."

"What's a clown?" Beth asked tilting her head to the side.

"A really creepy person who thinks it's entertaining to scare little kids. A lot of people are scarred for life after meeting one. I know I am." I gave a shudder a cringed a bit. They8 never actually did anything to me, but I never liked the idea of not being able to actually see someone's face. I have the same fear with anyone in a mascot suit or an animal suit.

Srej started to advance with the jar of white make up in one hand and a brush made out of strong goats fur in the other, just as we heard a knock on the door.

"Elenya, if you still wish to go to the Market we should leave now before the sun rises." Thank you Sheik you just saved my life.

"Couldn't agree more." I yelled back through the wooden door struggling out of Beth's death grip on my arm. I finally broke free and ran to the newly replaced door, "Bye girls see you later, probably tomorrow."

"But it's so early in the morning and you two just got back," Ilia, damn you stop questioning the all mighty Sheik so I can leave. "Aren't you the least bit tired?"

"No," Lies. I was exhausted, but they didn't need to know that. I grabbed my purse or pocket, it was just a one pocket bag with a leather strap, and ran out of there. Once I saw Sheik I grabbed him by the wrist and dragged him behind me. "We should go, now, before they find me and put that white stuff on my face." I think Sheik has a great fear of clowns too, because even though I couldn't see much of his face I saw him nod his head and pulled me to the horses as fast as possible. We ended up sharing the same horse again, except we didn't take mine this time… Actually I don't even know whose horse this is.

"Sheik…" He grunted.

"Did we just high-jack a horse?"

"I do not know this Jack you speak of."

"Never mind."

"…."

"…."

"Once we get to the city can we just sleep?"

"Was that not the whole reason for leaving so quickly?" I silently thanked whatever it was up there that loved me.

"Sheik, if I ask you to marry me will you take it seriously?"

"Yes,"

"Never mind then."

* * *

"What do you mean you only have one room?" I screamed my eyes bugging out of my skull and banging on the from desk of the inn right at the center of the city. "Does this room at least have two beds?"

"No, I'm afraid not, it's the honeymoon suite on the top floor." The large woman with flaming red hair said… At least I think she was a woman. "Most of the couples get married in the hot season, not the wet season; otherwise we wouldn't even have this room available."

I stood up straight and started smacking my head viciously cursing my luck. Pacing, I stared at the ground in a daze trying to figure out something else… Why does it always have to be honeymoon? Why does the world always have to try to set me up with a really sexy elf boy? Why-

"Elenya stop pacing you'll run a hole in the floor." Sheik ordered, and just like that I stopped. "We'll take i-"

"Why can't you give us something else? Like a really big room with two beds? Or one with a couch? I can sleep on a futon!"

"Don't you know? There's a ceremony being held in the square tomorrow." I gave her a dead pan look, you know the one. It's the one that just screams 'Are you kidding me?'

"What's it about?"

"It's a talent show more than anything else. The winner gets a special prize, it's different every year, surely you've heard of it? I was the winner once. I was quite a catch back in the day…" She started ranting off to Sheik about how gorgeous she used to be when she was my age… Somehow I highly doubt that.

"Well Sheik, I think it's about time we go to sleep." Sheik handed over three red rupees that came out of pretty much no-where to the… It… and….It…. gave us the key.

"Thank you, have a good night you two. And Congratulations!" I Looked at Sheik with what was probably the most ridiculous face known to mankind.

"Congratulations for what?" Sheik just smirked and gave me that bad look. I thought that the look went extinct, I mean Link stopped giving it to me ever since I started to spend most of my time with Sheik, well sort of, and Sheik gave that look to the necklace quite a few… I'm still wearing his necklace aren't I?

"Oh here's your necklace back." I said reaching to pull it over m head.

"You can keep it. It fits you."

"I'm not going to marry you."

"You do not have to. Just keep the necklace." I turned back around so we could return to our original task. Once I saw what was a head of me I groaned.

"You people should just go and invent escalators already."

"Do not worry; our room is only on the thirteenth floor." I could hear the laughter in his voice.

"Damn hylian torture device." Once he heard my comment he actually started to chuckle. He really is the most sadistic person I've ever met… He'd make a great dentist. "Speaking of hylian torture devices… Why were you even there in the castle that day?"

"My duty was to protect the royal family, and as the princess servant in the castle I fetched you for her." Fetched… What am I a bone?

"Then why did Zant listen to you? You must be part of his scheme somehow right? Are you spying on him?" I hope to God that's why. He didn't say anything, just continued to climb the stairs and completely ignored my existence. Really mature of him right? "You're not one of the bad guys right?" He just kept walking and started to walk faster almost as if he were trying to run away from me. "DAMN IT SHEIK ASNWER ME!" I caught up with him and stepped in front of him as if that was supposed to stop him from moving all together. Panic was starting to build up in my chest, tears started to burn my eyes.

"It doesn't even have to be the truth…" I choked. "Just tell me something... Anything…"

He didn't say anything just pushed through. I can't tell you why I was acting so overly emotional right then must have been hormones, but I was shocked, and confused. Sheik wasn't bad… Right? I mean he's been helping me and Link all this time hasn't he? He has to be good… It wasn't till I felt a very familiar pain in my chest that made it difficult for me to breathe. Something that I've been pushing back away so hormones don't get in the way.

"Great," I sobbed with my new epiphany, "I have a crush on a possibly evil Ninja." I wiped my almost exsistant tears with the sleeve on my yukata. "Just my goddamn luck."


	33. Pointless Vacation

**Pointless Vacation**

That night's sleep wasn't too great to say the least. Simply because I just found out that I liked a certain ninja. It wasn't even the fact of me liking him that unnerved me. It was the fact of the matter that I didn't even know what side he was on. Even though I wasn't sure if he was good or not doesn't mean I should automatically through away all my trust for him, right? I mean after all he always somehow saves me from something. Actually now that I think about it, I can't really remember the last time Link saved me at all, I think I was always saving him.

It wasn't till the next morning that I started talking to Sheik again. Even then everything that came out of my mouth sounded amazingly awkward and would always lead to an even more awkward silence. Of course we didn't wake up until about ten, so we got three hours of sleep in before an annoying amount of screaming, cheering, and laughter woke us both up. I would be surprised if Sheik got any sleep at all.

"Do you wish to-"

"Not really…" We were sitting at one of the tables in the middle of the square that gave us free breakfast with the purchase of a room, and we just watched all the laughing and happy people walk by. The city was alive buzzing with excitement about the soon to happen festival. I was poking my eggs and he of course wasn't eating anything. It was just around this point that I really started to miss Link. I know I shouldn't say I miss him even though I just saw him yesterday and he tried to kill me, but if it were him eating with me instead of Sheik I would at least be able to start an argument that would make me enjoy this meal.

"Miss! It's you!" I really should start actually putting the eggs in my mouth. I should write a book on how to eat things while I'm here. Step one; put food on fork. Step Two; put fully loaded fork in mouth. Step three; dump food into mouth. Step Four; take fork out of mouth. Step five; chew and swallow. "Miss!"

"Elenya there is a boy who is trying to catch your attention." I looked up from my eggs to sheik and then from Sheik's face to a boy who was standing too close for comfort.

"Oh you're that dude who was horribly afraid of Link way back when." I could feel Sheik's gaze on my face and so I looked back at him and filled him in. "This is an idiot who thinks that Link is a wild beast and I'm a sorceress that can tame wild animals with a magic power. Don't ask"

"I just wanted to thank you for saving me from that wild animal." I rolled my eyes at his great skill of ignoring someone calling him an idiot strait to his face. "My name is-"

"I honestly don't care what your name is."

"Then Elenya," How does he know my name? "Would you like to join me-"

"No. Please leave." I poked my eggs with my fork and ignoring the guy's existence. I felt something tug on my sleeve, thinking it was the guy I rolled my eyes and started to respond in a… bitchy manner. "Oh come on dude I said please! Don't you have your own life?"

"Elenya just let the man say his part."

"Um I don't think I will. If he wanted to talk to me he should have done so yesterday when it wasn't the morning."

"You were preoccupied."

"Oh shut up." They were really getting on my last nerve. I think the whole reason why what Sheik said bothered me so much was because we both knew that I was still in the temple killing off overly large bugs. Sheik looked at me than back to the man and then back to me, and started to silently beg me for my eggs. I know because every time he looked in my direction he was staring at my food.

The stupid idiot figured the silence was a good time to go and finally say what it was he was going to ask me in the first place.

"Elenya, would you honor me by entering the contest."

"I don't do beauty pageants."

"It's not a beauty pageant it is a talent show, and your uncanny ability to tame wild beasts would most definitely win first prize."

"Go away." I didn't even bother to look at the man just continued chewing on my eggs. "Could we pick up the tab now?" I asked pushing my plate away from me. Sheik nodded and waved the only waiter over to us so we could pick up the tab.

* * *

"Is there anything you need while we are here?" Sheik asked walking beside me down the southern path of the market.

"Could we visit Telma? You know check in on what's going on with Hyrule, there's no place better to check up on the Kingdom than a bar." He agreed and so that's what we did. Walking through the back roads were not fun, especially with the festival thing going on. Everyone was pushing and shoving trying to get their stands open as fast as possible, getting as much business as they could. When we got to Telma's bar there was a line going from the actual enterence to the steps of that lead of the back road. We pushed and shoved our way through to get inside to see that every seat was filled. Poor Telma looked like she was being over worked.

"Hey Telma, you need any help?" I offered yelling over the hussle and bussle.

"Sure, can you write or read?"

"Nope,"

"Just bring people their drinks then." I saluted her before walking behind the bar and started taking the beer out of the largest keg I've ever seen. And that's how we spent the next few hours, before we went back to village.

* * *

AN I know this is a really pointless and short chapter, but I'm getting out of character and I can't really feel the Mickey in me right now, but I HAVE THE FIRST CHAPTER FOR THE SEQUEL WOOT! And I have a new story for Batman coming up soon, depending if I can or not I'm going to try to put it on FictionPress on account it's barely even batman based. I had a lot of AN's for you guys and I felt like I didn't post anything for ages so that why I felt like I needed to post this. I'll have the next chapter up soon. Again So sorry it's so short and pointless.


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